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online dating is futile for guys


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Posted (edited)
It's a great charity that you would date a guy whose a 6 if he was absolutely amazing in every way, especially considering you yourself are a 6.

 

 

edit: looked at your pics again

 

Any girl who's not more than 20 lbs. overweight thinks she's a 10 nowadays just because thousands of decent looking to hot guys are lining up to bang them. What girls fail to realize is that EVERY other girl experiences the exact same thing.

Edited by Bob_Funk
  • Like 2
Posted

Look dude, I know this is not what you want to hear, but you are shooting out of your league. Check out this blog post: Your Looks and Your Inbox « OkTrends

 

Men just don't send that many messages to less attractive women -- even when the man is of equivalent attractiveness. You need to stop aiming so high. Find an ok-looking girl with similar interests. Good luck.

Posted

I mean, you can bitch about the situation (that men solicit women, rather than the other way around), but that won't change anything. If you want to achieve your goal of dating a woman, start pursuing less (physically) attractive women.

 

Or you can just post on the internet about how unfair it all is, I hear that's really satisfying too.

  • Author
Posted
Look dude, I know this is not what you want to hear, but you are shooting out of your league. Check out this blog post: Your Looks and Your Inbox « OkTrends

 

Men just don't send that many messages to less attractive women -- even when the man is of equivalent attractiveness. You need to stop aiming so high. Find an ok-looking girl with similar interests. Good luck.

 

Well, all I can get is the odd 250 lb. single mom, even though I'm a lean 170 lbs. I give up.

Posted
Well, all I can get is the odd 250 lb. single mom, even though I'm a lean 170 lbs. I give up.

 

Do you have a sense of what might make you undesirable to women?

Posted
Do you have a sense of what might make you undesirable to women?

 

Actually, yes, I know exactly what it is...and it's helpful when about half of the women's profiles I've seen explicitly state it. :bunny:

  • Author
Posted (edited)
Do you have a sense of what might make you undesirable to women?

 

Dude, I'm the norm. A guy who attracts women is the aberration.

Edited by Bob_Funk
  • Like 1
Posted
Dude, I'm the norm. A guy who attracts women is the abberation.

 

Let's suppose for a second that you're right.

 

You say that the only women you can attract are 250 lb single moms. I would, from my own dating experience, say that these women are on the low end of the desirability ladder for women. Probably near the bottom rungs. Let's say, on a ladder with 20 rungs, she's on rung 2 or 3. It is clear who is dating the women on rungs 15 through 20....the guys who are really really desirable.

 

Who do you think is dating the women on rung 4? 5? 6? 7? 8? 9... you get the idea.

 

Women and men are roughly (roughly!) evenly distributed across the planet. So there are a few possibilities:

 

1. The women on rungs 4-14 are happily sharing the desirable men with the women on rungs 15-20

2. The women on rungs 4-14 are competing with the women on rungs 15-20 for the few desirable men

3. The women on rungs 4-14 are single

 

Did I miss any? Which do you think is happening?

Posted
You totally ignored my point that according to your link, women voted pretty good looking guys as below average, while some frizzy haired yentl got rated as decent looking. What is the explanation for that other than women having an incredibly inflated opinion of themselves, and men playing the game on their terms because they will take any woman.

 

Some things arent in the power of men, but the fact that everything is made to comply with a womans fantasy (/delusions).

 

I just don't see how it is at all helpful to harp on this if your goal is to date women. Continually accusing women of being delusional is not very attractive, EVEN IF YOU'RE RIGHT!

 

Also, when you say that men will take any women, that is not consistent with the data that men are extremely reluctant to message less attractive women.

 

And for what it's worth, I'd totally **** the "frizzy haired yentl."

Posted
This bro experiment alone is a damning case against not only online dating, but also our awful culture.

 

If you're a normal guy having trouble attracting women , take a look at this experiment and all your questions will be answered. No wonder women all have such ridiculous high standards.

 

All this shows is that guys are willing to put their dick in anything. Not exactly a surprise.

  • Like 1
Posted
So I shouldn't tell the truth because women don't think it's attractive? That's the kind of white knight beta male mentality that's gotten men into this mess to begin with. What's right is truth and reason, not picking up where daddy left off by feeding some princesses delusions of grandeur.

 

And about the woman you would "****" I wasn't asking that, I was just pointing out the massive difference between how picky men and women are. Her male equivalent would most likely, die alone unless he had a lot of money.

 

You can say whatever you want, I'm just here to give some advice. If you want to have successful relationship with women, berating them for having high expectations is not a good strategy. You can sit here and be pissed off all you want, but it's not going to help you get what you're looking for.

Posted

If you're a man, and I don't care what level of attractiveness you are, you will always, always, do better in real life than online.

 

Online dating is heavily stacked in favor of women, for reasons already mentioned in this thread.

 

Online you can search for people based on criteria you personally enter in. From height, to income, to ethnicity. Some of you will be blown out for not meeting those criteria alone. Let's say a girl only wants profiles of men from 5'9-6'3 displayed, and you're 5'8; you won't show up in her searches.

 

Conversely, if you approach that same girl on the street, is she really gonna take out a measuring tape and blow you off because you're an inch shorter than what she wants? No. Your charm/personality/other intangibles will carry you.

 

You can't replicate your personality on a web page. I don't care how clever you think your profile is. And that's assuming people are even reading it and not just judging you off your pictures.

  • Like 1
Posted

You can't replicate your personality on a web page. I don't care how clever you think your profile is. And that's assuming people are even reading it and not just judging you off your pictures.

 

This is so unbelievably true. I find it slightly amusing that people place such emphasis and weight on the written profile. I hope people know you can purchase/steal/"borrow" profile text from the internet or even some other dude's profile, right...? And someone can spend hours writing the "perfect" profile and have zero conversational skill.

 

And I speculate that if a person's pictures are good enough, they will make up for whatever upsurdity is written in the profile...

Posted
This is so unbelievably true. I find it slightly amusing that people place such emphasis and weight on the written profile. I hope people know you can purchase/steal/"borrow" profile text from the internet or even some other dude's profile, right...? And someone can spend hours writing the "perfect" profile and have zero conversational skill.

 

And I speculate that if a person's pictures are good enough, they will make up for whatever upsurdity is written in the profile...

 

Yeah. I mean I've seen all sorts of experiments run by guys to see just how bad OLD is. Ones where guys set up fake profiles posing as women, without ANY pics on the profile, and STILL get messages from men.

 

I've seen ones where guys make profiles using shirtless, ripped models as their pictures, and get girls who said in their profiles they're not looking for ONS or hookups to send them naked pictures, phone numbers, and set up dates all in the first night of talking to them.

 

OLD has really shown the ugly side of the dating world. Revealing how desperate some men are (messaging profiles that don't even have pictures?, really dude?) to how shallow and picky some women are.

 

Real world interaction, that's where it's at. Even if you meet someone online, you can always find a higher quality person in real life.

 

Very few high quality people rely on online dating to get dates.

 

Also, online, your message can be buried under messages from all the other hundreds of men.

 

When you meet a girl in real life, it's just you and her talking; you're not competing with hundreds of other guys.

Posted

No doubt about it, girls have a much easier time. My last serious ex (whom I met on a dating site) said she received 100 messages within a few days of signing up.

 

The current girl I've been on a few dates with (kissed etc but nothing else yet) seems pretty keen with lots of texts and flirty banter, but I see her on the dating site multiple times a day whenever I happen to look without being logged in myself (yes, not good but I got burned by a girl earlier this year I was seeing for a few months who picked another guy in favour of me so I like to know roughly how much interest they have). Absolutely no doubt she is getting lots of messages from other guys on there too (and maybe/probably meeting with them). Part of me hopes she is just checking messages as some kind of ego boost (I'd probably be logging on frequently too if loads of girls were messaging me) and is actually really interested in me, but I realise how easily it could be game over as soon as someone who ticks a box that I don't comes along.

 

Girls have the luxury of picking from a million half-decent suitors, guys have far fewer options and have to just hope that the girl they are interested in decides they are the best choice of many. As with any situation where you are competing with lots of other people, some of whom are probably the "star athlete", you are going to lose far more frequently than you're going to win.

Posted
It's a great charity that you would date a guy whose a 6 if he was absolutely amazing in every way, especially considering you yourself are a 6.

 

 

edit: looked at your pics again

 

 

I think I am good looking in real life. Your opinion does not matter. People who see me in real life tend to not think of me as a 6.

  • Like 1
Posted
So after messaging over 1000 girls, I finally found one who was interested. Ended up going back to her place on the second date. One thing led to another, and eventually her clothes came off. It wasn't a pretty sight.

 

HUGE gut, hairy nipples. "F*** this s***!" I thought, while on the brink of crying. If this is the best I can get, especially after all that effort, I'd rather just be celibate. I immediately stormed out and never talked to that girl again.

Um, hairy nipples?! :confused: Are you sure this wasn't just some fat guy?

Posted
I think I am good looking in real life. Your opinion does not matter. People who see me in real life tend to not think of me as a 6.

 

Regardless of how many times you say "I'm hot" (4 times in your last post?) I'd say 6 is about right.

  • Like 1
Posted
Regardless of how many times you say "I'm hot" (4 times in your last post?) I'd say 6 is about right.

 

 

That's your opinion. Your entitled to it. In real life, I am told differently. I do believe I am hot, based on my body and over all, real life appearance.

 

My boyfriend did not like my online pictures and without meing rude, told me I am much better looking in real life. As has everyone else.

 

I never said I was the best looking thing out there - I said in real life, a lot of people find me good looking.

 

I am not deluded - I am a realist,. based on my life experiece and what people in my real life tell me; not some 2 D online pics.

 

I have never had a issue getting any guy I want, because of who I am in combination with my appearance.

  • Like 2
Posted

HUGE gut, hairy nipples. "F*** this s***!" I thought, while on the brink of crying. If this is the best I can get, especially after all that effort, I'd rather just be celibate. I immediately stormed out and never talked to that girl again.

No to make light of your misfortune but this made me laugh out loud :laugh: I can see hairy nipples being an unpleasant surprise, but how could you not know she had a gut ahead of time? What was she dressed in?

Posted

Don't give up yet bob just as your luck is changing and you land a woman who's up for action. You've honed your online seduction skills after those 1000 msgs and its now starting to pay off. (:laugh: sorry)

 

"but how could you not know she had a gut ahead of time? "

I wondered this as well. Dark baggy clothing I guess + his mind was probably blocking it out to a degree earlier on as he was hell bent on getting a result.

Posted
:laugh::laugh::laugh: I deff had to laugh at this..
Posted

With all this going on, I love how people continue to suggest doing OLD.

 

It's just retarded.

Posted

Well where else can you meet people? I rarely meet anyone new. OLD is my only option I think, unless I want to meet men in bars.

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