soonerfan77 Posted June 19, 2012 Posted June 19, 2012 Well my ex and I broke up 3 weeks ago. Two days after we broke up she was in a relationship. Now this was a mutual breakup and I was fine until I found out she had already moved on. I think her and this guy were talking on facebook while we were together, but not 100% sure they had met though. I think they met the day after we broke up because we were together ALL the time. I think we both have been emotionally checked out of the relationship for a month or so now. Well anyway 10 days ago I sent her a goodbye message. It wasn't mean and she responded with something short. Today she responded to the same exact message saying she just got it. She said she was sorry that was how I felt. Then she sent another message saying is there anything else you need to say. Now keep in mind it CRUSHED me 3 weeks ago when I found out she had moved on already. I have been fine the last few days or so, but here is what I sent her back when she asked if there was anything else I needed to say. "Yeah don't contact me again. That message I sent was 10 days ago. I haven't contacted you since then so why are you contacting me now?? Why does it matter if I meant what I said?? You moved on. I moved on. End of story. Take care" Her response............."sorry I will respect your wishes." It feels good to send that and not care after just 3 weeks ago feeling like my heart was ripped out. Like I said it was a mutual breakup so she had every right to move on, but hurt she did so fast. Just curious why the hell she contacted me. She knows she already responded to that message 10 days ago. LOL Anyway, sure she was just trying to start up some talk, but I am so proud of myself to shut it down and not care!! It was an e-mail by the way. She has a new phone number and I don't know how to get in contact with her which is fine with me.
Philosoraptor Posted June 19, 2012 Posted June 19, 2012 Maybe she is worried about you? Maybe she feels guilty. But you set your boundaries so don't ponder why she does things anymore. Just stick to your guns and continue to work on moving on.
flitzanu Posted June 19, 2012 Posted June 19, 2012 two days after you broke up she was in a relationship? hate to be the one saying it, but that was being planned long before the breakup then. she's pulling typical girl crap trying to talk to you to alleviate her own guilt. also "i'm sorry YOU feel that way" is not an apology, it's just wordplay. let her have the nonsense she was wanting, sounds like you're much better off than being with someone that fickle.
Jose11 Posted June 19, 2012 Posted June 19, 2012 She just sent that message to make herself feel better. By seeing if your ok, she can feel less guilty of what she did. Which she, hate to say it, sounds like was planning long before you guys broke up. Give her NC an thatll make you feel better. Remember your needs first. 1
Chi townD Posted June 19, 2012 Posted June 19, 2012 (edited) The break up wasn't mutual. She checked out long before you did and was cheating on you up until the plug was pulled. There was no "mutual" understanding on why the relationship didn't work. It didn't work because there was someone else in it and you weren't aware. She's sneaky and underhanded. She'll have to live with the way she treated you, becuase you don't have to. Time to heal and move on. Actually, she goated you into sending that last email. Stating is there anything more you need to say? That screams at me that she wanted you to lay into her so she can get mad at you. Convince herself that you're a total ass and she was right to break up with you and hook up with someone else. Edited June 19, 2012 by Chi townD 1
flitzanu Posted June 20, 2012 Posted June 20, 2012 The break up wasn't mutual. She checked out long before you did and was cheating on you up until the plug was pulled. There was no "mutual" understanding on why the relationship didn't work. It didn't work because there was someone else in it and you weren't aware. She's sneaky and underhanded. She'll have to live with the way she treated you, becuase you don't have to. Time to heal and move on. Actually, she goated you into sending that last email. Stating is there anything more you need to say? That screams at me that she wanted you to lay into her so she can get mad at you. Convince herself that you're a total ass and she was right to break up with you and hook up with someone else. well done! i'm with chi, i think it's very likely she wanted you to insult her so she could be "mad".
Catherine76 Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 I broke things off with a man and he went on and on about being friends, even sent me a card. Then when things were okay and I said I was fine after having a rough time of breaking it off with him, he suddenly disappeared when I didn't answer an email for two days and here on facebook, he's updated his status to being in a relationship with someone. Totally insane. I ignored it for a while until his ex finally got to me and told me she had caught him cheating on her and I was the one. I had had no idea. So I ended up ripping him a new one. Turns out he was trying to put this in my face to make me jealous. Kept saying all this stuff like she is the best one yet and maybe I'll marry her! Really childish stuff. I threw in his face that I knew about his ex and what he had said to her and he lost and told me to never contact him again. Then he blocked me on facebook two days later. This man is 40 years old acting like he was in high school. I figured out he had a serious personality disorder, had cheated on his pregnant wife, she had cheated on him later then left him and he tried to kill himself. Still swears it was her fault because at least he admitted his indiscretion and he had to do it because he was tired no sex and masturbation. Some people are just really immature. Really immature. And really sick.
Sugarkane Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 Don't feel sorry for her at all. She was cheating on you.
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