Bubbles Posted July 15, 2004 Posted July 15, 2004 BAJI, Sounds to me like she is taking full advantage of the fact that she does have the opportunity to get away. There's nothing wrong with that even though you have an urgency to get back together with her and don't want her to go anywhere except to your apartment and work things out with you. Not to sound mean but.....that is your priority....not hers. She will enjoy herself in New York for as long as she can enjoying her family and time with them and then she will come home eventually. She will make her decision when she is good and ready to. Remember I told you to be patient. You read far too much into everything she says and does. Patience man! Patience! Bubbles
BAJI Posted July 15, 2004 Posted July 15, 2004 Well she is going to NY on Friday 16th and she told me that it is a 1 way ticket and she will be able to return anytime. She said that she don't want to tell me if she Loves me or not and if we are going be together when she returns, but before that she said that she don't know if we will be together this year. Well in the meantime I will try and meet and go out with other people. She saids that she is not going back to NY to see anyone particular, just to enjoy the rest of her summer, I don't know if to believe her but I have always trusted her. I told her that I believe that this is true Love what we have, she said that it hurt alot after the breakup, she didn't really have fun when she went out. She says that she misses the relationship sometimes. Why women are so complicated? If they are hurting because they broke up, why not try to work things out. I think she needs to see that I have actually changed and that things will be different in the relationship if we try it again. I have never felt this way about anyone else, and this might be the worst breakup she have ever went through. So I thank everyone for their help! And advice is greatly appreciated. BAJI....
BAJI Posted July 16, 2004 Posted July 16, 2004 She is off again. This morning she came down for us to go to the SS office, she came in the bedroom and I asked for a kiss and she gave me 3-4 kisses on the lips the way she like to do it. We went to the mall and I put my hand around her waist and neck and she didn't move, we played alittle today. Yesturday I called her, she sounded sad,I asked her what was wrong, she said nothing, when she came down stairs, she looked sad I asked again and she said nothing again. The first thing she really said is when we get back together we should be able to date other people and have fun, huh? She sounds really confused and I think part of it is because of her cousin, maybe all of it. Her cousin doesn't have a steady boyfriend, so she goes out with different guys, I believe that her cousin is influencing her in things and to go out on dates. She wasn't like this until she went to NY, seems like she is battling between heart and mind, I think her hearts calls for me and her mind calls for what her cousin has. I guess she has to find out for herself, but I don't want her sleeping with anyone then returning to me. I wish she hadn't gone to NY. When she leaves I will try to go out with my friends and have fun and ignore most of her calls when she call. I want her to miss me and think that she is loosing me, will that work? What is the best way to make her long to talk, see or to be with me.? Bubbles, RoboHobo, anyone advice and reassurance needed. Any ideas what to do?
BAJI Posted July 17, 2004 Posted July 17, 2004 She hasn't even called to tell me that she have arrived. I have put 2 and 2 together now and I don't know this for a fact but it is very good posibility. My ex dumped me, we didn't really had a rocky realtionship, 3 week into her summer vacation she broke up with me she says because she can't put up with it anymore and that I call her in NY too much, dam good reason to end a 2 year relationship. Come back and asking me for money something she has never did, also saying that she don't have to work. She told me that the family friend/ cousins' best friend reminds her of me that he is just like me. Now the only thing that he has is money, he has a good job. I am highly pissed that she dumped my for him because of material stuff, (going to resturants, shopping etc.) this is the first time I have ever knew her to act like this, she have never asked me for a penny in her life. No I don't think that she did already but if she speads her legs for this guy because of his earnings that bi*tch can stay the hell up there and the joys will not last long cause I know she isn't herself up there. If that happens she is really a high class prostitute. F**k her, I hope she gets preguant and he spits in her face. B*tch. What do Ya'll guys think of that??
BAJI Posted July 20, 2004 Posted July 20, 2004 I told her how she have changed so much and she said she knows for the better, I told her that she hve change into someone that I never thought that she could've, she asked how, so I told her that she turn materialistic, all about the money. She asked if I was jealous because I couldn't give that to her in the relationship. I then told her this" I didn’t do anything wrong in the relationship, I was a good boyfriend to you despite the obvious. You have chosen to breakup up with me to do whatever you are doing maybe you think that there is something much better than what you had with me. You are doing what you think makes you happy so therefore I will do what make me happy, what makes me a stronger person. I will give you time and space to think things through about what you are doing, and I think its your cousin's bestfriend that you have been infatuated with because he reminds you so much of me and he can spend all this money on you and you think that I can’t because of my present situation, but I’m not waiting for ever, that time for you to decide if you really want to put yourself out there with everyone who wants to sleep with everyone or you want a loving secure relationship with someone that you know who really truly loves you. If weeks and months go by and you look back at what you have done and you say to yourself, ‘man I really hurt BAJI, I deserted him when he needed me the most’ and you want to give it another try then I will decide if I’m going to take you back. And if you have slept with other people… I know that someone influenced you to do what you did and the funny thing is that people envy others who have something good and maybe that someone wished they had the love that we had for each other and tried to take that away to make them feel better. You hadn’t broke up with me good and you are bouncing around with you know who. I know you Latty and you have higher morals and more self respect that this. LOVE waits for no one and you know that I am a very kind, loving, understanding and faithful person, who have always been there no matter what, what more can you ask for. Well I not going to be waiting around after this week, so you need to make up your mind. I am who I am, if you like what NY have turned you into? (Materialistic, now always about the money, shopping, fancy restaurants etc.) the stay there, I never thought that you would turn out to be like that. Money doesn’t bring Love or happiness; you gave up Love for something that you lusted after. Your lost. You told me that your cousin bought you ticket and I know that that isn’t true and I have always asked you to be honest with me. After awhile people get tired of spending money and catering to a person, especially after they got what they wanted out of it, and who gets hurt in the end? So make your decision." She got upset after I told her that after this week I will be waiting no more and said that she don't want to get back together and I said that is your choose. She said that there is nothing going on between she and her cousin'd best friend. After wards she started to talk like the girl I once knew, she talked kind to me instead of abruted. She also said that I only think of my feelings, she said that I hurt her, I didn't understood, I said if she meant when my fiance came here she replied yes and I told her that we weren't even together then and she should've told me. SHe said she did, she said that she said that I didn't even paid her any attention whe she was here I said that I didn't know that it was that kind of hurt that I only found out how bad it was when our mutual friend told me that she was hurting and I appologized to her when I found out and I did yesturday. I asked her if she thinks that I'm a bad person or a cheater and she said no. I think that she held that against me all this time. And I am truly sorry, I don't ever intend to hurt anyone. My question is did I do damage or she actually realized that I have actually became a stronger person? And seeing how sorry I am for what I not intentionally did, would she come back to me. I still want her back, I LOVE her so man I do.
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