LadySwag12 Posted June 18, 2012 Posted June 18, 2012 My boyfriend of 3 years just confessed he cheated on me with one of his good coworkers. He has never cheated before and never come close to it and fessed up right away. It was his birthday night his friends came up for a concert and I was unable to go out that night. I could tell he was very intoxicated by the end of the night by the texts I was receiving. He told me all he remembered was taking the condom off and then passing out. When he confronted his coworker the next day she asked if he could keep it secret because she is married and has a child and it didn't mean anything to her. She also said she's been wanting to do that for a few weeks now. I confronted the coworker, and she tried to tell me that nothing really happened between them because he was so drunk. Since this has happened I agreed to work it out with my boyfriend because I believe he is truly sorry I can see it in his eyes and I believe he is the one I am supposed to be with. I'm unsure how I am supposed to cope and get over this though? He has agreed to get tested since neither of us knows if anything did happen that night or not. Any advice is greatly appreciated!
96nole Posted June 19, 2012 Posted June 19, 2012 Spend some time over at the infidelity board, there is a lot of good advice over there. I will say you are in a better position in that he confessed as opposed to you finding out another way. At this point you can see he is sorry for doing it. If you found out another way, you wouldn't be sure if he was truly sorry for doing it or just sorry for being caught. But make sure he knows exactly how you feel. He is going to have to do a lot of work to make sure he rebuilds your trust. He should be willing to do what ever it takes to make YOU feel safe in the relationship. Being drunk is still no excuse.
Nohbody Posted June 19, 2012 Posted June 19, 2012 All of your feelings are valid. If you decide you can work it out, I think that is awesome. If you suddenly decide you don't want to - that's fair, too. This is a major betrayal, and it isn't your fault.
CopingGal Posted June 19, 2012 Posted June 19, 2012 But what happens the next time he gets drunk? And why would he get so, so, so drunk, does he have a problem? You have a lot of thinking to do. Good luck.
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