Bathroadman Posted June 18, 2012 Posted June 18, 2012 I posted another thread earlier about this. 6 days ago my girlfriend of 5 and a half years dumped me as she was unhappy the last month or so. I always got annoyed at her if we did not go to the pub or clubbing. I have learned from my mistake now. We also did not have enough to alone together. We were very close and would talk like friends before this. I am wondering what are the best steps now for me to get her back. I read the magic of making up by t.w jackson. That e - book states give her space to miss me and what we have. Anybody any ideas ?
Twins Posted June 20, 2012 Posted June 20, 2012 I would agree with some space and time. Let her miss you.
sheithappens Posted June 20, 2012 Posted June 20, 2012 stop reading those e-books! they give you alot of false hope! I was in your position four years ago. The best thing you can do is work on you, make yourself happy and as the poster said give her space and have her miss you. they all come back eventually! keep your head up and the world will turn
BB7 Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 I've been sucked into those e-books too...they give some good advice but it's does give false hope. You need to stop contacting her altogether right now and leave it for a month just like the books say. Do not lapse on this, I mean it may not be the be all and end all, but she needs to know that you will be fine without her. In the mean time really focus on yourself, but do it for you, not her.
fucpcg Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 You like to go out all the time, and she doesn't. That is a big difference in personalities. I won't date someone who goes out all the time, especially at the cost of us having personal time together. If someone always chose the pub before me, to the point that I chose to break up with them, I'd never get back together with them. Because after all, when we were dating, their choices showed what was most important to them. If the pub was more important before breaking up, the break up will NOT change what you find more appealing. Maybe temporarily to get your security blanket back, but in the long run no it won't change your priorities, you will go back to wanting the pub more than your girlfriend.
Gulf-Delta Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 I posted another thread earlier about this. 6 days ago my girlfriend of 5 and a half years dumped me as she was unhappy the last month or so. I always got annoyed at her if we did not go to the pub or clubbing. I have learned from my mistake now. We also did not have enough to alone together. We were very close and would talk like friends before this. I am wondering what are the best steps now for me to get her back. I read the magic of making up by t.w jackson. That e - book states give her space to miss me and what we have. Anybody any ideas ? Space and time. There's nothing you can do to change her mnd. She's her own person with her own mind. The only thing YOU CAN control is giving her time and space.
sheithappens Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 I almost forgot , read this . It helped me out a few years ago http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/second-chances/84894-guide-second-chances
Boynextdoor Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Space and time. There's nothing you can do to change her mnd. She's her own person with her own mind. The only thing YOU CAN control is giving her time and space. i highly agree with this. Well My ex of 2 years and 4 mo's broke up with me 2 months ago in the reason of arguing a lot. Ive done several things a man can thnk off to win ex back. (which I think will work) in the transition of 2 months mixed signals was sent. Droping by my webpage,nice then cold, now unfriended me online. Despite of it all I did not retaliate though im hurt. Because I lOved her dearly. I used to be optimistic and now I tend to be clouded by my emotions at times given the fact that we are already 2 months apart. I almost decided to buy them e-books to win them back or better yet break NC. Well since i try to contact her and inspire her every other week / every 2 weeks nothng seems to work. We hafta trust it with NC because we cant make them/convince them to come back. It has to be felt by them within. Though it sucks right now.. Ryt? Well only thing that we can work on is ourselves and show them that we have changed thru actions not by words. They seem to be very dettached now but things arrent forever. All we gotta do is focus on ourselves. Because change comes from within.
Boynextdoor Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 i highly agree with this. Well My ex of 2 years and 4 mo's broke up with me 2 months ago in the reason of arguing a lot. Ive done several things a man can thnk off to win ex back. (which I think will work) in the transition of 2 months mixed signals was sent. Droping by my webpage,nice then cold, now unfriended me online. Despite of it all I did not retaliate though im hurt. Because I lOved her dearly. I used to be optimistic and now I tend to be clouded by my emotions at times given the fact that we are already 2 months apart. I almost decided to buy them e-books to win them back or better yet break NC. Well since i try to contact her and inspire her every other week / every 2 weeks nothng seems to work. We hafta trust it with NC because we cant make them/convince them to come back. It has to be felt by them within. Though it sucks right now.. Ryt? Well only thing that we can work on is ourselves and show them that we have changed thru actions not by words. They seem to be very dettached now but things arrent forever. All we gotta do is focus on ourselves. Because change comes from within. Have to correct myself though. When I said I almost broke NC.. Well since I did them its called LC. So now back to NC. Well my ex is taking up her boards at the end this month for er nursing exams. We broke up because she wanted to focus on her board and I the used to be "support system" is now a distraction to her
Gulf-Delta Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 i highly agree with this. Well My ex of 2 years and 4 mo's broke up with me 2 months ago in the reason of arguing a lot. Ive done several things a man can thnk off to win ex back. (which I think will work) in the transition of 2 months mixed signals was sent. Droping by my webpage,nice then cold, now unfriended me online. Despite of it all I did not retaliate though im hurt. Because I lOved her dearly. I used to be optimistic and now I tend to be clouded by my emotions at times given the fact that we are already 2 months apart. I almost decided to buy them e-books to win them back or better yet break NC. Well since i try to contact her and inspire her every other week / every 2 weeks nothng seems to work. We hafta trust it with NC because we cant make them/convince them to come back. It has to be felt by them within. Though it sucks right now.. Ryt? Well only thing that we can work on is ourselves and show them that we have changed thru actions not by words. They seem to be very dettached now but things arrent forever. All we gotta do is focus on ourselves. Because change comes from within. Well, as everyone knows, there are different types of relationships. There are ones where you just ****, ones where you just hangout/date to get over being lonely, there's non-serious, yet commited relationships, there's marriage/engagment and so on. Her coming beck really all depends on the kind of relationships you guys had. If you guys had a real committed relationship, with unconditional love, trust, support, etc. and were living together, discussing futures, etc. her chances of realizing her mistake are much better. It's hard to quantify, and you really need to be honest with yourself about your relationship. In my case, my ex and I had a very real relationship that was really based on solid things that relationships should be built on, and I won't go into it all here, but that's why I have the outlook I do.
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