YoungGuy Posted June 17, 2012 Posted June 17, 2012 I don't know this forum, nor do I know if it's normal to ask about falling in love and or being rejected, but I'll give it a try, so here we go. Hi. I am a confused young man at the age of 15. Yesterday I came home from a christian "confirmation camp" that lasted for 2 weeks, under which weeks I developed strong feelings for one particular girl. At the camp, she flirted with me and we talked to eachother pretty often, and I got the impression of that she actually liked me, which I thought was great because I liked her very much. Anyway, I will go back to day 3 (I think) of the camp. This was the day that I started getting feelings for her. I talked to her for the first time, and we seemed to have alot in common, we had both lived in the same place as kids, and we had similar interests. OK so, after this day, I started feeling like she was a nice person and we kind of became friends. The day after, on "freetime" we sat in a big room, kind of like a living room with comfortable chairs. Anyway, some confirmanders (those who were getting confirmed on the camp) were sitting there and just hanging and talking with eachother. Suddenly the girl I like(d) said : "I have such neck pain, anyone here good at massaging?" and she asked her friend and roommate : Can you massage me? and the girl said No you know I'm bad at that. Then my roommate and friend randomly said as a joke that I'm good at massaging, and she asked if it was true, and coincidentally it actually was true because I sometimes massage my parents and actually get money for it because they think I'm good at it, so I told her that yes I am good at it. And she let me massage her, and I massaged her for a good 10 minutes, while we also talked. In the camp we had funny program aswell, like competitions and games, and in all of those I was in her group in competitions etc. So we talked alot and got to know eachother, and it seemed as if she was flirting with me now and then. Anyway things were like that the whole first week, then we all went home for the weekend, sat-sun, and then back on monday for our lessons again. I talked to her on facebook and tried to keep in touch with her under those 2 days aswell. So when we got back to camp, things were pretty much the same, she flirted sometimes, I flirted back and tried to be really nice and caring, and we talked alot. So, 2nd week, on thursday, we were watching football EM, all of us in the "TV-Room", and she just randomly again said that she has a bad neck, and I said I can massage her again if she'd like me to, and she said yeah if you want to sure. And so I did, and I really tried to show her by moving my hands on her shoulders etc in a way that I liked her, she allowed me to massage her like that aswell. Things were however pretty much the same after. The following day (the last day of the actual camp) friday, in the evening we had some fun program once again, with games and funny things with eachother in the camp. So there was this game called "The gentleman-test" in which all 5 boys, and 5 willing girls had to do a random non-planned "sketch". My roommate and friend was first, he just joked through it etc, the game would work like: Game Leader: OK, you want to ask the pretty girl out, but you have to get her parents permissions, what do you do? And 2 other camp leaders acted as parents. So he had to talk them into letting him go out with their daughter etc. and then the leader would say random situations that he had to handle to make the girl feel comfortable etc. (I said all of that just to give you an overview of what the game was about) Anyway, I forgot to say that, ironically, among the 5 girls that wanted to participate, the girl wanted to aswell, and all of us 5 boys and 5 girls stood there, and the leaders chose who we were gonna be with, I don't remember however if we were assigned or not but I think that me and the girl I liked got assigned to be with eachother in the game aswell, or I actually just walked and stood next to her. So when it was the 2nd guy's turn, he joked and didn't take it seriously obviously So the girl I like said to me "I hope you're a better gentleman, right? " and I was like yeah sure, and she said "Try to be serious and don't be like them" I was like okay, yeah. And then when it was our turn, I approached the parents, and said : "Hi, I just moved in next door, I really think your daughter is cute and I would like to take her out." The "father" was happy with the fact that I wanted to take his daughter out and that I thought she was cute, but the "mother" didn't like it etc etc, not relevant, anyway, I succeeded in the test to go out with her after charming her parents. So, in the play/game we walked towards a cinema, and the leader said : "You are walking in the forest, and suddenly you see a river in front of you, and you need to get over it, what do you do?" The other guys had done everything from telling the girl to jump herself and building a bridge, I thought that was boring, so I simply picked her up and took her in my arms and jumped over she thought it was funny and didn't mind. Anyway, we had some situation to deal with in the "cinema watching the movie" aswell, that I dealt with blabla. Then same thing on the way back, I took her in my arms and jumped over the "river" that actually was a blanket. Every other guy had tried to be funny and didn't take it serious, whilst I tried to have both fun and take it seriously. So, after everyone had done this, we voted for the best gentleman. I won without problems, 2 boys voted on eachother and everyone else voted for me. So the camp leaders said "Okay, we think that the gentleman should take icecream first! " (we had this game in the dining room of the school that the camp took place in). Anyway, the girl I like and who was the girl in the test with me, said "But what about me?" as a joke, and I actually said "You can go first" and she said that was sweet and cute of me, and all the girls were like "aaaww" xD. Anyway, in the end of the day, we had this thing where you write your name on a paper, and let it go past every other confirmand, and you wrote one or more things about this person. As a matter of fact, I know what she wrote on the paper about me, and also obviously you can tell the difference from what a boy wrote and what a girl wrote. Anyway, I will go ahead and just say what was on the paper when everyone had written something about me (you could choose if you wanted to write who wrote it to be anonymous or if you wanted to say who you are, I will just assume if a boy or a girl wrote, and I pretty much know what all the boys wrote) anyway : - THENEVERENDINLAUGH (written by a boy) - A funny man with alot of love to women (also written by a boy) - We had fun playing hold 'em (written by a boy) - Coffee addicted man (written by a boy) - Girl charmer who charms everyone near him with his happy mood and bright smile. (written by one of the leaders, a man) - Really friendly guy with a sharp mind! Helpfull gentleman (also written by one of the leaders) then what the girls wrote about me: - The coffeeman - A guy who likes coffee, you have beautiful eyes, a sweet smile and you are a really cute girl charmer - Coffee lover Positive, gentleman. - A polite and super kind and sweet campbuddy! =) - The gentleman of the camp! Positive and talkative - The gentleman of the camp =) and a nice guy. - The girl charmer of the camp who is talkative and really kind - The coffee and hard to push in the water guy. You're also kind and funny! (the push in water thing is something that happened in the camp, she tried to push me in the water and didn't succeed ) - The charmer of the camp, and a really amazing guy with a nice and good personality. Cute smile! (written by one of the leaders, a girl) - It has been such fun to learn to know you even better. What a CHARMER! (also written by one of the leaders, a girl) Here is the one that matters: - Suuuper kind and cute. It's nice that someone laughs at my jokes... (Written by the girl I like) On the night, I talked with my both roommates, who knew I liked that girl, and they said "So when will you ask if she likes you?" I said "I won't" and they both said "Oh comeon man you have got to be kidding me? Haven't you seen how much she's been flirting with you and how much you both like eachother, she's let you massage her 2 times for crying out loud! It was so obvious today that you like her when you tried to impress her etc on the gentleman test " I said, well even if I like her it doesn't mean she likes me just because she's so nice to me and a bit flirty..? And they said of course she likes you. So you can imagine why I thought she likes me. So if you actually read all of that, which I doubt anyone would, the day after, saturday, we got confirmed. (if you don't know what confirmation is google it or something, it's a part of christianity, a ceremony or something) So after all of that, we took our goodbyes. Everyone in the camp hug eachother, and I hug all girls, and then when I hug her, it felt really close, and she held onto me for about 8 seconds or more, while everyone else it was like 3 seconds. It honestly felt like she liked me. Anyway, when I got home, later that evening, I told her on facebook when she wasn't online "Hey, I want to talk to you about something, so tell me when you can talk " Later that evening, when I saw her online on facebook, the conversation overall looked something like this: Me: Hey, did you see what I wrote earlier? She: Yeah we can take it now if you want to She: So whatsup? Me: (told her that I like her blabla alot of stuff) She: Well, you're incredibly sweet and cute, but I don't think I'm in love with you... You're really super nice and I had a feeling that you liked me but... It has been really fun to be with you and everyone else and I hope that we meet again soon and that we still can have fun together. I appreciate it soo much that you're so honest. You're really great. Me: Okay, I'm glad I got it said ;p She: Yeah but it is... and really I appreciate it sooo much that you're honest! Me: Just forget about it I just wanted to know how you feel because I don't know but I've never met a girl who just randomly asks for massage and who it's so easy to talk to like you, anyway I just want you to remember how incredible you are, you have such a great personality and you're cute and funny, just remember that. She: I'm really sorry if I made it look like I was in love with you. I really didn't mean to. I usually try to be straight on and honest so that it doesn't get worse... and I really HAVEN'T tried to "play" with you. I hope you understand that... Me: yeah but that's not why I liked you ;p absolutely not your fault, I don't want you to think I'm angry or disappointed at you or something, oh well but we're still friends though right? She: OF COURSE!!!! No one can destroy that! Me: She: You're really great and I like you very much, but just as friends! but a real gentleman, you are! Me: Thanks She: haha! ;D hope to see you soon. I'm heart broken. I will add that this is the first girl I've ever felt this strong about and not just about looks, I love(d) her for the way she is. You may think this is mostly me whining but YES I do have a question. Do you think that she would like me if she knew me better? I've only known her for 2 weeks, so I thought maybe I should just keep talking to her on facebook as friends so that we can get to know eachother better? And those in the end of her messages everywhere are SOO annoying, don't know what to think she means with that. And she actually said I'm cute, which is why I thought she likes me. Anyway, should I keep trying by just talking to her occassionally and hope that she realises that she likes me if she does? Or should I completely give up on her despite all the flirting and the massages, or should I ask her why she wanted ME to massage her etc? Just so confused.. I got the impression of that she likes me when she apparently didn't, please give me some tips, should I really forget her or should I keep trying or just try to talk to her and stay FRIENDS with her..? Regards, if you want to know more about the situation ask. Btw, this topic I've posted on one other forum aswell, and one of them said that this was the type of situation he had when he was 19 and had asked a girl out, she said she doesn't like him that way but then 2 years later when he had a girlfriend she said that she liked him and wanted to see how hard he would try or something. And I don't understand why she flirted so much with me if she didn't like me.. I mean massaging her not one but TWO times, I see that as flirting. so now Im not sure if I should keep trying by just getting to know her and ask her out sometime or if I should forget about her or keep talking to her as friends? Help..?
Philosoraptor Posted June 18, 2012 Posted June 18, 2012 Well it's obvious she did like you but you both seem a bit young to date to be honest. The word "love" keeps coming up as if it's supposed to be there instantly. Now did you tell her in any way that you "loved" her? I'm reading her saying she didn't love you but not sure where it came from. If you did mention something like that I'd think you came on way too strong.
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