Should I break 3 weeks NC to apologize for reaction to breakup??

[Jono85]

I'll try to be concise..(i suck at this).

 

Dated about a year, with a breakup of about 3 months in between (contact throughout breakup). Basically first 8 months before 1st breakup, she was the needy/insecure one who's feelings seemed to be ahead of mine. I could never return ILY's and even broke up with her a couple times b/c I felt guilty, only to get sucked back in by her within 24 hr (doesn't this sound like a healthy relationship!! ). The 3 month breakup I broke up with her b/c I caught her flirtying on FB with a past crush, and she tried and failed to cover it up/delete it. After I broke up with her, siting lack of trust, she admitted it was a huuuge mistake, and only did it b/c I could never give myself fully to her (partially true, but still obv inexcusable). So after weeks apart, and missing the heck out of her, and feeling as if I was the one who got dumped, I realized I DO in fact love her. I have for a while I realized. I finally told her this, and wanted her back. She was not so receptive this time and "needed time".

 

She came back a couple months, maybe less, later. Anyway, after an awesome first weekend back together, things seemed off when she went home (she lives 2 hours away). There were great days, then distant days. I started fights b/c I was insecure now from when she texted that guy behind my back. Admittedly I acted semi-needy, but she WAS being distant and different from the past. But she told me it was b/c she WAS different and had grown, and put herself first now etc etc. But still, something seemed off.

 

 

Anyway, after fighting every couple days, she eventually broke up with me. I reacted very immaturely, as I was crushed that she wanted to throw in the towel on us. Especially when the first 8 months I stuck with her even through all her insecurity episodes (she started a ton of fights b/c of it). So I basically told her to never contact me again. "I'll never take you back. Don't even reach out to me, just think of a fond memory and smile". I didn't write anything TOO nasty, just basically not to talk to me and how I never gave up on her, yet not even a month of me being insecure and she disposes me. She hasn't replied since, and neither of us have tried contacting eachother almost 3 weeks later (the longest we've ever been in NC by far).

 

So should I break NC to apologize for acting so immature about it?? I really did love her, and feel if she's happier without me, I don't want her staying. But at the same time a part of me does feel betrayed, and really upset that she gave up on me so sudden, and so easily. I also feel there has to be another guy, as I doubt she could just throw all this away like that. But 3 weeks is such a great start to NC, and I'd hate to throw that away. There's just this part of me, however small, that feels like such a baby for not reacting more maturely. Thoughts?

Edited June 15, 2012 by Jono85

[nofool4u]

So should I break NC to apologize for acting so immature about it??

 

Hell no. She was the one being immature by disrespecting you by signaling interest to a past crush on FB, and trying to cover it up no less.

You owe her nothing.

 

 

I really did love her, and feel if she's happier without me, I don't want her staying.

 

You may have loved her, but if she felt the same she wouldn't be letting another guy know she is interested in him. If I am in love with someone, you won't catch me dead letting another woman know I am smitten about them by flirting with them.

 

But at the same time a part of me does feel betrayed

 

You were betrayed

 

 

and really upset that she gave up on me so sudden, and so easily.

 

Thing is, she has no basis to be the one to give up on you. She was the one showing disrespect, not you.

 

I also feel there has to be another guy, as I doubt she could just throw all this away like that.

 

Well you already know she was flirting with someone she is attracted to. Of course there is another guy. She is the kind of tart that likes to keep her options open. That is the kind of girl you do NOT need.

 

 

But 3 weeks is such a great start to NC, and I'd hate to throw that away. There's just this part of me, however small, that feels like such a baby for not reacting more maturely. Thoughts?

 

Just leave it be. She doesn't deserve the consideration.