vanek26 Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 Hey guys. I'm a male in my young twenties and have been talking to a girl a year younger than me for a few weeks now. We met for coffee one night and had a pretty fun conversation. We decided to get together again, and she suggested a movie at her place. Well, we all know what that means... So last night I went over there. We rented a movie and as we were watching it i started to cuddle with her and judge her interest. She allowed me to touch her but didn't seem too into it. I kissed her softly on the lips a few times and she allowed it. Again, she didn't seem like she was dying to kiss me, but she may have just been nervous or whatever. The movie ended and I decided to try to make some moves to see if she really was into me or not. I figured if she wasn't interested, she would start talking about how tired she was (I've been rejected enough to know the signs, lol). We started kissing a bit more passionately. And I got on top of her and we were rubbing our bodies together. I worked up the courage to rub her vagina over her pants and she allowed it. I tried to slip my hand in there and she grabbed it and stopped me. I asked her what was wrong and she said "it's not that i don't want it... it's just i don't want to go all the way." I assured her that I didn't plan on going all the way with her. At this point we cuddled a little bit more. I held her and was rubbing her back. Again, I was waiting for the "i'm sleepy" but it never came. So I did some more exploring with my hands. And this time, she let me slide my hand into her pants. I rubbed her over her underwear for a while, and eventually started touching the bare skin. She was pretty wet and was moaning throughout the process. I fingered her for a good ten minutes and then asked her if she wanted me to continue and she said no. So with that we said our goodbyes and I left. She sent me a goodnight text which i didn't receive until the next morning. I texted her this afternoon and she has not yet responded. Basically, do you think I may have gone too far and it turned her off? Maybe she didn't want anything to do with me but lacked the confidence to tell me to stop? I feel like she wouldn't have moaned while I was fingering her if she didn't want it, but I'm not sure. I'm not concerned with whether or not she wants a relationship or a FWB situation. I just want to be able to see her again. What do you guys think?
ALoveStudent Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 Hey man, I understand exactly where you're coming from as I've been in similar situations myself. Anyway, as far as you going "too far", I think that you did in this situation. When a girl stops you from doing something it means that she isn't comfortable progressing to that level of intimacy. At that point, you should've respected her decision and not progressed further. Also, the mere fact that this girl invited you over to watch a movie at her place suggests that she had interest in you. Now to answer your main question of whether or not going too far can turn a woman off. This all depends on her comfort level. Some women are comfortable going all the way at a fast pace while other are not. However, once you go past the girls own comfort level then that can turn her off. In other words, a girl can only be as interested in you as much as she is comfortable with you. Now as far as seeing her again man, that all depends on if she is still interested in you after your first date performance. If she accepts another date with you, I would say that you have another chance. If she doesn't. then you gotta move on man its over unfortunately. If for some reason you do get another rendezvous with her, I would advise that you take it slow. You can never move too slowly man, just too quickly. I'm not saying to be a wimp and not make any moves, but if you get any vibe that she may be uncomfortable, then don't take it any further. Read her actions, not her words. Hope this helps 1
SJC2008 Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 So if she said 'I'm sleepy" is that code for I'm going to bed, follow me or is that a no? Serious question. My money is on you ASKED her if you should continue. She was wet and moaning and you could of had sex IMO but asking her put it on her thus making her uncomfortable and that's the last thing a woman wants.
Solo34 Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 Hey guys. I'm a male in my young twenties and have been talking to a girl a year younger than me for a few weeks now. We met for coffee one night and had a pretty fun conversation. We decided to get together again, and she suggested a movie at her place. Well, we all know what that means... So last night I went over there. We rented a movie and as we were watching it i started to cuddle with her and judge her interest. She allowed me to touch her but didn't seem too into it. I kissed her softly on the lips a few times and she allowed it. Again, she didn't seem like she was dying to kiss me, but she may have just been nervous or whatever. The movie ended and I decided to try to make some moves to see if she really was into me or not. I figured if she wasn't interested, she would start talking about how tired she was (I've been rejected enough to know the signs, lol). We started kissing a bit more passionately. And I got on top of her and we were rubbing our bodies together. I worked up the courage to rub her vagina over her pants and she allowed it. I tried to slip my hand in there and she grabbed it and stopped me. I asked her what was wrong and she said "it's not that i don't want it... it's just i don't want to go all the way." I assured her that I didn't plan on going all the way with her. At this point we cuddled a little bit more. I held her and was rubbing her back. Again, I was waiting for the "i'm sleepy" but it never came. So I did some more exploring with my hands. And this time, she let me slide my hand into her pants. I rubbed her over her underwear for a while, and eventually started touching the bare skin. She was pretty wet and was moaning throughout the process. I fingered her for a good ten minutes and then asked her if she wanted me to continue and she said no. So with that we said our goodbyes and I left. She sent me a goodnight text which i didn't receive until the next morning. I texted her this afternoon and she has not yet responded. Basically, do you think I may have gone too far and it turned her off? Maybe she didn't want anything to do with me but lacked the confidence to tell me to stop? I feel like she wouldn't have moaned while I was fingering her if she didn't want it, but I'm not sure. I'm not concerned with whether or not she wants a relationship or a FWB situation. I just want to be able to see her again. What do you guys think? Wow. Sounds exactly like the girl I was just seeing. We fooled around, kissing, me rubbing outside of her pants and top, sucking on her titties, hanging out all night. Sent her a text, didn't hear a peep back for a little over a week. It was ridiculous. If she does get back to you and you guys start hanging out and she asks you for a love letter down the line, let me know. If you're on the East Coast of the USA, it's probably the same chick... --- Honestly though OP, I had no idea that other women pull this BS as well. I've never got down with a female to have her pull this on me (or anyone else I've ever known, either). I guess they just flake out more than I thought they did. The only thing you can do is what I did when she flaked on me: Give her space and let her contact you on her terms. Sucks, but that's how they roll I guess.
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