GreenSeed334 Posted June 13, 2012 Posted June 13, 2012 (edited) Okay, long story short. I broke up with my ex 7 months ago, she tried fighting for me back but I just needed time to myself at the time and had to go. After about 2 months, her old ex came back wishing her back, they have been off and on for 4 years. She told me she did not want him at first but ended up giving in after he made her "happy". After about another 2 months, he stopped randomly talking to her one day, and she bascially told him to go F himself. So she ended up in anotherh heartbreak. And he went back to his girlfriend and is now happy with her. Guess he just ended up using my ex. Then about 1 or so months ago I ended up texting her for the first time to see how she was doing. She ended up telling me her Brother was digonsed with a illness and only had about few years to live. So we talked about that and some other things. Over the past few weeks we have been talking at times. I try not to text her too much to annoy her. She ended up telling me for now she just wanted to be a kid and if things worked out between us she would try again, but not now. Other then that when I text her(Im always the one to text first)she usually keeps a conversation and sends me Smiley faces and winks, and at times flirts with me but rarley. We ended up hanging out one day and had a good time. She started at me and laughed just like the first time we met. So I felt a small connection. AfterI left I ended up texting her that she looked good and it was good too see her, and she told me the same thing. The next day I texted her saying I missed her and hope to hang out with her more. She told me she does not mind hanging out but right now she does not want a relationship or if she ever will. She told me that she did not want to lead me on and dissapoint me in anyway and hurt me. And that she said she was too Stressed out from everything and can barley make herself happy, yet alone someone else. I told her I will be there if she needs help and I was in no rush for myself. Since then I havent talked to her, and want to give her space and not make it seem like Im forcing her like her ex did and ended up hurting her. So what do you guys think she is doing? I asked her if I should move on and she told me right now its probably the best Idea, and I asked if she really had no more feelings for me, she said that was not, she will always have something for me but she said she couldnt really tell me what to do in honesty because she doesnt know what she wants anymore. (Btw Im 21 and she is 19). I think I will let her settle down and try to talk to her later. I know its not the best time for her to express everything, Edited June 13, 2012 by GreenSeed334
Author GreenSeed334 Posted June 14, 2012 Author Posted June 14, 2012 No one has a little advice at least?
Philosoraptor Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 Look man, you hurt her. She may be able to forgive the pain but it doesn't make her forget how you left her and how she tried after the fact only to continue to be rejected. It's not easy to just let someone back into your heart. You need to be patient with her and give her time to warm up to things. I wouldn't just stop talking to her though as that will likely not come off as just giving her space. From the other side it looks like "I said no and he bolted".
Author GreenSeed334 Posted June 14, 2012 Author Posted June 14, 2012 (edited) The thing is, shes not really angry at why I left. She told me straight up shes over that. I was with her for almost 2 years and I know her enough that she is not really one to hold a long grudge or hate someone or a very jealous girl at all. We talked about the whole thing and she forgave me a long time ago and understood why I had to go. She is more hating her ex right now because he is the one who unlike me, Lied, led her on and used her, and then left. All I wan't to know is, how should I talk to her? should I still try to show her I care, and try to hang out with her more and maybe try to flirt a little here and there? or just text her once in a while and just be a regular friend? I mean Im in no rush for a relationship with anyone, but I just don't know how to really handle this situation since she told me she doesn't know what I should do. I still feel like I care for the girl and some things feel unfinshed and if it came down to it, I would give it another shot, and she also said she would if things "fell into place". Edited June 14, 2012 by GreenSeed334
Philosoraptor Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 I'll take your word on this but I implore you to take under consideration that no one wants their ex to know that they are hurting or scared. For now do just that, be her friend. Don't get pushy, just be patient. If you want to be with this person you'll just have to let her take her time. Things might work out, you might waste a lot of time and have her come around to tell you she met someone and was excited to tell all of her "friends" about him. But if you want her enough, you'll be patient and take the risk.
dng Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 I read the title of your thread as "Does my ex need time for what?" and its not a bad question. Look at yourself. When you feel for someone and want to get involved, do you need time to think about it?
Author GreenSeed334 Posted June 15, 2012 Author Posted June 15, 2012 I read the title of your thread as "Does my ex need time for what?" and its not a bad question. Look at yourself. When you feel for someone and want to get involved, do you need time to think about it? Well that depends, when we first met I did want to be with her, but I did not jump straight into it. We got to know each other and talked on and off. And If I wanted someone and I was hurt by them, I would probably do what she did Is doing.
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