Ghaleon Posted June 13, 2012 Posted June 13, 2012 So I added this girl on facebook that I remembered seeing at an old job I used to have a long time ago. She had a video up of her playing guitar so I sent her a message saying hi and complimenting her. I always thought she was lesbian. Well she started talking to me a lot after that and next thing I know she told me that she used to be a lesbian that she was with a woman. She asked if I was okay with that because she said she kinda liked and wanted me to know her know her. She was best friends with her mom and she died back in January and then she lost her aunt and she lives alone with her dad who has Alzheimers and she takes care of him. Well she got a friend to watch him and she asked me out. Things went really well and she told me EVERYTHING about herself so that there wouldn't be anything come up in the future that I could break her heart over. Well things were going great till this past weekend when her sister came home for the last time before she is moving out of state. The girl I'm talking to has to stay in state to continue getting paid to take care of her dad. I noticed this past weekend she started acting funny. Well last night she tells me that she might be moving and that she will talk to me tomorrow. So I called her today and she told me that she went over to her ex gf's last night and she sweet talked her and now she is confused and doesn't know what to do. She says that if she moves to close to her uncle she might get help with her dad. She tells me however that if I'm thinking about dating her that I should just forget her and that we can still be friends but she is not ready for a relationship because she is in a bad place in her life right now. So all last week and everything she was flirting heavy with me and talking with me and we hung out and stuff and then the day her sister comes home everything and changes and today everything really changed. I don't really know what do because she felt like the right one.
sid3 Posted June 13, 2012 Posted June 13, 2012 Don't take it personally, she wasn't over her ex. All you need to know is that you are still single and looking. Lots of women out there, go meet a few.
Author Ghaleon Posted June 13, 2012 Author Posted June 13, 2012 I try not to take it personally, its just the circumstances that surround it. I've been treated horribly by my soon to be ex wife (we have been separated for 6 months now) and she knew that. She said she tried being Lesbian because her sister is and she was with this woman that is a lot older than her for 3 years. She said the woman constantly told her that she didn't love her and that she wished she would find somebody and move on. Well she found me and knew I was vulnerable. So she basically tells me that she has long term ambitions in mind and is talking with me about things like that all the time. Then she just stops one night and the next thing I know shes talking with her ex again after swearing to me shes not lesbian and that she is through with women. I really, really like this girl a lot.
sid3 Posted June 13, 2012 Posted June 13, 2012 Women seem to change their minds like the weather don't they. Well I can't say I'd try being gay if my brother happened to be, maybe a new hobby or unusual food perhaps. Anyhow, you'll find there will be no shortage of girls you'll really, really like if you get out there and meet them. in fact, I'm sure you'll find at least a few you like even more. Sure it stings a bit now, it'll pass quickly if you learn something from it and dust yourself off. 1
truth_seeker Posted June 13, 2012 Posted June 13, 2012 Women seem to change their minds like the weather don't they. Yes they do!
Author Ghaleon Posted June 13, 2012 Author Posted June 13, 2012 Thanks for the replies thus far and I couldn't agree more. It just kills me that she got so personal before doing this. I mean she got to the point that she wanted me to know really personal things that she would never want to get out about herself.
Shaun-Dro Posted June 13, 2012 Posted June 13, 2012 Thanks for the replies thus far and I couldn't agree more. It just kills me that she got so personal before doing this. I mean she got to the point that she wanted me to know really personal things that she would never want to get out about herself. The best survival weapon is to never ever take women seriously. Women can't even take themselves seriously, so why should we? You'll be better off if you just have fun with them and never grow attached, period.
amantis Posted June 13, 2012 Posted June 13, 2012 i dont understand why are you surprised that she left you . You were married , you have some experience in relationship . You know that she was having problems with her father and she was a "lesbian" and her ex was still in the picture I was married and i know that your ex = problems = waste of time After the divorce i know what i want , you should too . She was only supposed to be your friend and you wanted more , your own fault tell me please , you were thinking that you were going to be together (forever )with her , or you were just waiting and dreaming until something like this happened ? Just find someone with no problems in their life , and cute ... i tell you , its not dificult at all ( if you are really looking for a relationship ) Theres alot of crazy girls out there but with time you can find someone normal , just get the divorce and take time for yourself
Author Ghaleon Posted June 13, 2012 Author Posted June 13, 2012 Your right Amantis. I guess I shouldn't be surprised at all. It just took me by surprise that she came on so strong and was talking about how if we had kids she already had the names and stuff like that. She was married once before and had almost the exact same thing happen her as did happen to me. I told her I was going for my paperwork this week and she said she was fine with that and that she understood. I'm just going to cut everything off until I get my divorce then take some time for myself and then maybe later on down the road I will contact her again if no one else is in my life.
ascendotum Posted June 13, 2012 Posted June 13, 2012 I second amantis's comments. I found this weird though..."She said she tried being Lesbian because her sister is". I guess if you have the hots for a woman you dont worry about it. Wanting to go back to an ex that constantly said they didnt love her, is also a little screwy. She's just as likely to contact you again when the ex gets bored with her in a bit.
Author Ghaleon Posted June 14, 2012 Author Posted June 14, 2012 So true. I bought her this shirt last week that she has went on and on about how much she loves it, well Saturday during all this weird stuff she posed in a picture wearing the shirt and wanted me to know that she was wearing it. Weird stuff.
RedFemale Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 Women seem to change their minds like the weather don't they. Well I can't say I'd try being gay if my brother happened to be, maybe a new hobby or unusual food perhaps. Anyhow, you'll find there will be no shortage of girls you'll really, really like if you get out there and meet them. in fact, I'm sure you'll find at least a few you like even more. Sure it stings a bit now, it'll pass quickly if you learn something from it and dust yourself off. Maybe we can open a gay club for straight men.
Author Ghaleon Posted June 14, 2012 Author Posted June 14, 2012 I also remember she said that her ex talked to her in a way she never had before. She said it would be like if my wife showed back up and started talking to me in a way I had never heard her talk before. I told her that she had done that before and it was because she saw that there was competition. She then said that she feels crazy and she feels like she doesn't deserve to smile. She said the one person that has been helping watch her dad was a guy that is a little bit mentally slow and makes her give him pics of her in a bikini in exchange for watching her dad. My friend thinks that this girl likes me but at the same time is afraid of me. I remember that she said she doesn't want a relationship with anyone including her ex right now but shes comfortable around her ex and she wants that comfort right now. She said shes getting prepared because when she puts her dad in a nursing home he loses all income and will be on the street and the car that she is paying on is cosigned by her ex.
dasein Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 Forget her entirely and move on, don't try to remain friends or you will probably go through several cycles of this back and forth unpleasantness. She was not truly available, and in all likelihood took up with you in a rebound moment or a fight with the ex. Also be wary of people who tell you "all about themselves" too early on, this is a sign of emotional issues. Good luck finding more available prospects for yourself, but do consider going NC without being mean and moving on with your life.
2sunny Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 Too much DRAMA! Read the four agreements! You'll find out why she's delivering so much drama your way. End it!
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