emma123 Posted June 29, 2004 Posted June 29, 2004 Hi, I hope someone has some good advice for me coz i'm so confused. My boyfriend split up with me 2 week's ago. we'd been together for 2 and a half years and split up a few times but always got back together again. But this time it's different. We have now split up because he says he doesn't love me anymore. We have talked every day since and generally been ok with each other. He's said he'd come and finish some diy jobs for me in the house coz i carn't afford to get someone else in 2 do them so i need 2 keep him sweet for that. He's confusing me because he says he needs time on his own 2 sort his head out.Right from the start of the relationship he's always had a downer on life in general. I want him 2 sort his head out. He also doesn't see why he should do what society says he should do 2 be happy ie get married have kids ect by a certain age he's 31 now. I'v asked him if in time does he think we could give it another go. he says maybe maybe not he doesn't know how he will feel then n said i'd proberbly be with someone else then anyway. He also says he doesn't want 2 be with anyone else n what we had was special. but he doesn't want to be with me ether right now. he says he wants me to move on n meet someone else but says that he wouldn't b able to cope with it if i did n that we couldn't be friends. he wants me to enjoy my life not wait round for him. when i'v suggested not having any contact though he said he didn't want that. I still love him allot but i haven't been the best girlfriend, I have been selfish and wanted everything my way and have nagged about it till i got what i wanted. In one of the times we were split up i got with someone else i really regret it now and wish it never happened. So in a way I want to stay friends until he has sorted his head out to prove that i wont do it again. I feel i owe him that. Im really confused. i don't want to hurt him. what should i do?
gold26 Posted June 30, 2004 Posted June 30, 2004 my bf rebounded once during a breakup only to realize he was stupid.. he confessed it to me and even thought i appreciated his honesty it messed me up alot for a while.. this may just be his way of trying to deal with feelings.. i have a possesive nature and even though i love my bf dearly i felt very betrayed by it...with me when we wre intimate or he said something sexy or flattering i would picture him saying the same things to her.. he may just be testing you to prove he can trust you. i would doall i can to reassure him you could never be with anyone else and if he wants time to sort his head out your willing to wait ... i dont mean to wait a lifetime.... but it may be what he needs to hear...nobody likes to feel they can be replaced... i may be wrong but its how i would feel... hope things work out
Author emma123 Posted June 30, 2004 Author Posted June 30, 2004 My Ex came round last night he still says that he doesn't wont me back but we have arainged to go to the cinema on fri but there was nothing on we fancied so now he is coming round 2 watch a dvd n maybe get a takeaway instead. I don't get it! why does he still want 2 do this sort of thing so soon if he really dosen't love me? I will give him some time but how much should i give? he says he wants 2 be aloan 4 a good year. It's so hard 4 me coz i like to know were i stand.
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