freetolove Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 I've been thinking about this for a while, would you leave someone over bad sex? this guy who's great but he's lacking in size have basically ruined sex for me. At first I didn't think much of it but I was chatting with a friend and she asked me why I was nick picking everything about him and I finally realized that it was because I wasn't sexually satisfied. His penis is small, so I don't really feel anything when we're having sex, I just lie there confused as he's trying to have sex with me. (this is not a joke), minus all that, he's a great person, caring, loving, etc. Would this be worth breaking up over?
Balzac Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Have you and Mr. Dinky talked about this? Is there chemistry but you lack satisfaction as in he does nothing to bring you to orgasm? How did you get together? Why have you stayed? People terminate relationships because of bad sex, sure.
Brit Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 I've been thinking about this for a while, would you leave someone over bad sex? this guy who's great but he's lacking in size have basically ruined sex for me. At first I didn't think much of it but I was chatting with a friend and she asked me why I was nick picking everything about him and I finally realized that it was because I wasn't sexually satisfied. His penis is small, so I don't really feel anything when we're having sex, I just lie there confused as he's trying to have sex with me. (this is not a joke), minus all that, he's a great person, caring, loving, etc. Would this be worth breaking up over? Well, you mentioned he is a great, caring, loving person, but you lightly chatted with a friend and betrayed him, by telling her he has a small penis....how lovely. Only you can answer the question if his small penis is an issue, but i would not go embellishing this to others for his sake.
Author freetolove Posted June 11, 2012 Author Posted June 11, 2012 We met through mutual friends. I haven't brought up bad sex yet but he's well aware that it's small, it doesn't take a genius to figure that out. He tried to make it better his effort is buying sex toys, etc. Everytime I see how small it is I get upset/frustrated (not a joke) I never brought up the size to him because I think it's mean but do you think I should bring it up?
Author freetolove Posted June 11, 2012 Author Posted June 11, 2012 Brit, I said I chatted with her about nickpicking, not about the bad sex, I came to the realization about the bad sex. that's why I'm on a forum about it.
Chi townD Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Well, if you're not happy with your sex life then cut him loose. Sounds like you're looking for any excuse to cut him loose anyway. So, break up with him. However, give him any other excuse BESIDES his sexual performance. You're going to break his heart, don't crush his male ego. My personal opinion, I think you're going to let a good guy go and one day you're going to regret it. Sex is part of a relationship and is part of a marriage but it isn't the only thing. And sex in a relationship can be fixed to make it enjoyable for both parties if you're willing to try......but, I think you already made your decision. 2
Brit Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Brit, I said I chatted with her about nickpicking, not about the bad sex, I came to the realization about the bad sex. that's why I'm on a forum about it. I can understand this. It seems to be an obstacle that you will not be able to overcome. If it is a problem now, it will become much more of an issue further in the future. I would not mention this as a reason to him, because it may lead him to become neurotic about it, and unless penile implants have improved drastically in recent times, there is really not much he can do about it.
USMCHokie Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Hmmm, threads like this make me wonder...does a girl I'm dating think I'm too small and doesn't want to admit it...?
Brit Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 You should dump him and then find someone as shallow as you are. Find someone with a HUGE $%&& who is even a bigger &^&( in real life. Have you ever thought the problem might be that you are too loose? I think women like you are so shallow and I hope you dump him; because he deserves someone so much better than you. Someone that will appreciate real attributes like being "great person, caring, loving". Some people are never happy and don't know what they have lost until they have lost it. The problem here is your lack of depth as a person; not the size of his winky...These problems are easily sorted with open and honest communication. You can having amazing sex with a guy; no matter how big/small his winky is.. "This," was uncalled for. How ugly.
Chi townD Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 "This," was uncalled for. How ugly. And dumping a guy for something that is beyond his control and isn't is fault isn't ugly?
RickFox Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 "This," was uncalled for. How ugly.'' No, it was simple brutal honesty, tactful no, straightforward, yep.
Balzac Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 (edited) What you did was attack the OP personally; an ad hominem attack. While you may view her feelings and question to the forum as unjustified, stuck to the issue at hand. One may question why she has stayed in the relationship as long as she has, or why upon first discovering Mr Dinky's size but why attack the OP for coming here in honest reveal? Edited June 11, 2012 by Balzac
Brit Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Men are so quick to judge a woman as shallow....so for all you men...who believe OP is so shallow, answer me this, say you met a woman, who was born with a birth anamoly of being a female, but also had a penis, (this does happen, not often though) and she was sweet, loving, and caring, and loved her penis and vagina, would this cause you to be, "shallow,"...or would you love her for her, and her vagina-penis?
CaliBabe Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 I think you should break up with him, not for the fact he is small, but because it clearly bothers you and it seems like you are trying to find a reason to leave him anyway. You are already nit picking him. Just end things and find someone more suitable for yourself. Just spare his feelings on why your leaving him.
geegirl Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 its clear as day the OP has the emotional depth of an orangutan. Please, no insulting the orangutans. 2
Brit Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Firstly, I am a woman but its clear as day the OP has the emotional depth of an orangutan. Just do a search for her threads and read a few of them. I don't base my answers on what I read on a single thread. I normally do a search of posters; to form an opinion of them and their situation. She posted this on the 8th of June -> http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/329614-man-teasing-me ...She posted the winky thing in other forum and got 5 pages worth of answers. My reading of her is spot on. She is shallow. An alpha female appartently ... I have no time for people like the OP. Ok my opinion is not welcome by some. That's fine. I call it as I see it. I have made my contribution to the thread so I will leave it. Whether people agree or not that is why its called a 'forum'.. The question was intended for the men who claim to be non shallow, and a physical attribute that cannot be helped and should be accepted, so my question is they are dating a female born adrogenous, but fully female according to genes but also wield a large 9 inch penis, and she is loving, caring, and sweet, then this would not be a deal breaker for them, it would seem, by their responses to OP. They would enjoy her vagina and large penis....not an issue:)
geegirl Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 OP, he seems to cover all other bases well so that in itself are things you should place as priority and I do believe that there are other ways to have great sex, even when he has a small penis. You just have to learn ways to improvise and if communication is great between the two of you, exploration can be your ticket to having great sex, albeit the small penis.
Chi townD Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Men are so quick to judge a woman as shallow....so for all you men...who believe OP is so shallow, answer me this, say you met a woman, who was born with a birth anamoly of being a female, but also had a penis, (this does happen, not often though) and she was sweet, loving, and caring, and loved her penis and vagina, would this cause you to be, "shallow,"...or would you love her for her, and her vagina-penis? Hey some guys are into that. But, for the ones that aren't, then upon the discovery, most would just end the relationship rather than continue with something you don't like. Letting the other person get emotionally involved and falling in love with a person that they THINK loves them equally as well.
Brit Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Hey some guys are into that. But, for the ones that aren't, then upon the discovery, most would just end the relationship rather than continue with something you don't like. Letting the other person get emotionally involved and falling in love with a person that they THINK loves them equally as well. So they are indeed, also shallow, and not accepting of a physical attribute someone cannot help.....so it is shallow calling out shallow.
Chi townD Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 So they are indeed, also shallow, and not accepting of a physical attribute someone cannot help.....so it is shallow calling out shallow. No, allowing a person to become emotionally invested in someone that they are not attracted to is cruel. So, why stay? Did Mr. Dinky have a lot of money? Treated her like a princess? Why stay?
Author freetolove Posted June 11, 2012 Author Posted June 11, 2012 Brit, I appreciate you stepping in while I was gone. For the person who judged me for my question, you're obviously angry about something that happened in your past, stop taking it out on people in this forum. You make all these assumptions but don't even know me. Obviously in a forum setting, we're not trying to become best friends, we're trying to solve a problem that exists in the "real work" that isn't easily discussed or resolved. Anyway, it's not like I didn't give the guy a fair chance, I care about him but I'm thinking more on long terms/marriage now. Sex is important to me. It's like telling someone, "hey no sex/bad sex for the rest of your life but you should be with me anyway because I'm a good person" My thoughts on this is MEN are the ones who care a lot more about this then women. But yes, I DO Care about sex. I'm feel blessed that I actually have a choice. Thank You It's obviously a sensitive topic which is why it's posted here, not directly at him.
Author freetolove Posted June 11, 2012 Author Posted June 11, 2012 Chi, I've stayed with him so far because I like him for qualities such as possible good father, he's smart, intelligent and overall a good person. I make more money then him and yes he does treat me well.
Joaquin Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 A man wouldn't bat an eyelid leaving a girl who didn't satisfy him sexually. Eg I wouldnt be with a girl if she refused to give blow jobs. If your not getting it how you like it, it's probably best to break up. It's not like his penis is going to grow or your suddenly gonna feel fulfilled. Good fulfilling sex ( love making....) is important.
CaliBabe Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 ^^^ DANG.... You gotta respect Flourescent for doing her homework though.
BewitchedandBothered Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 I've been thinking about this for a while, would you leave someone over bad sex? this guy who's great but he's lacking in size have basically ruined sex for me. At first I didn't think much of it but I was chatting with a friend and she asked me why I was nick picking everything about him and I finally realized that it was because I wasn't sexually satisfied. His penis is small, so I don't really feel anything when we're having sex, I just lie there confused as he's trying to have sex with me. (this is not a joke), minus all that, he's a great person, caring, loving, etc. Would this be worth breaking up over? Not sure that I would leave someone over that==I was with someone who was impotent. He turned out to be an abusive jerk any old way; because I thought I was in love, I am pretty sure I would have kept on trying with him. Have you communicated your feelings to him? He probably thinks he's satisfying you===you could open the lines of communication and that could change. If he's great and you connect on all other levels, give it a whirl; things could work out fine.
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