Norse Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 Let me start off saying we've dated for a total of 1 year and 6 months. We did break up for 2 months once because I was being too "controlling" according to her friends, and she was tired of my guilt trips about spending too much time with her friends over me. We got over that, one day she told me she was done and wasn't going to take me back, so I let it go and never spoke to her again. The very next day I didn't respond to any texts or calls and she eventually told me she wanted me to take her back and she wasn't appreciative of my good qualities. So I did. It's been six months now, and she recently flew several states away to be a bridesmaid at a friends wedding. So I sent her some texts being jealous and said "is your groomsman cute?", "you're not talking to any guys are you?". I'm not sure why I said these things, I guess after a few days I started missing her and was just sad. To be honest we're both jealous like that, when I got my recent job the first text she sent me while I was there was, "are there any cute girls there?" and I told her, "no I just come here to work, I only care about you". So I was hoping with me texting her asking about cute guys and stuff she would kind of tell me the same, well it didn't work like that. She started to seem without emotion in her texts over the next few days and I knew something was up. So I sent her one asking if we were okay. Big mistake, that's what caused us to break up the first time, asking that question always initiates it. So I called her and asked if we were going to stay together and she said she just wasn't sure. So the next day(yesterday) I brought her some flowers and we seemed to get a long fine, we talked about it a bit and disputed it. Eventually we were hugging, kissing, etc etc, even though she didn't seem to care much for kissing me. Which in my opinion is because she's pretty upset. She told me she felt attacked because I told her not to talk to any guys, and what I asked was "you're not talking to any guys are you?". To her it was an attack but honestly I was expecting her to say something along the lines of "no I just care about you". Then she went on to tell me that it seemed like i was being controlling again. Over the next few hours she told me she would think about it. So far this time she hasn't untacked the facebook status, and is still telling me she loves me only when I say it first and that she misses me, but she's not calling me any pet names , and we're still semi acting like a couple, this is ten fold not as harsh as the last time when we went strictly friends. As far as I know she's only told her best friend about us having some issues. And her best friend told her to follow her heart and do what she thought was best pretty much. I feel she may not remove the facebook status because she doesn't want her whole family to know, because then she will have to explain. And they'll gun me down real fast. I didn't get to see her today, but tomorrow we are going to meet up at an event with her best friend, I'm pretty sure she wont hold my hand or anything there... I'm just going to do my best not to act a fool. So my strategy is this... Not to say anything about her decision. Continue to act like a couple, and hope this nulls away, and sweeps under the rug. I feel like she's just upset over it all. If she does say she's done some day I have two plans, I'm going to tell her that she's jealous too, and likes to check my texts from time to time, and I never check hers because I trust her, and she gets annoyed when I hang out with this older lady or when she texts me. It just looks like she could relate and understand, I told her most of the things above. In some aspect I feel like she is punishing me making me not sure of what she's going to do because that scared me into not ever saying anything about her spending time with her friends last time, and maybe the thinks that's what it will take again. Even before she told me that the first time she was going to eventually take me back, and she told me that on several ocassions. If all else fails I'll just not talk to her and hope she will come back. Do you guys think I have a good strategy? Or have any other tips? Thanks!
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