USMCHokie Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 So in my numerous experiences with small town America, there's something that I've always been curious about... When I meet or see women who either live in or are from small towns, more often than not, they are engaged or married at a very young age...and the explanation I often get is that there really isn't anything else to do in a small town except get married and start a family, especially if they have no way out. And from what I've seen, it doesn't take much to get a ring on their finger... And if I meet and talk to them, they are in shock and owe at what I do and/or have done...and coming from a place where people like me are a dime a dozen, I have a hard time understanding why they are so amazed... So either from your personal experience or observation, are women from small towns more willing to settle? Should guys look to the "small town girl"...? Any thoughts on this particular dynamic...?
Feelsgoodman Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 The problem with small town girls is that most of them are overweight McDonalds fiends...and those who aren't fat/disgusting get taken as soon as they hit puberty. Your chances of finding an attractive, single, small town girl who is past jailbait age are pretty much nil. 3
Solo34 Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 The problem with small town girls is that most of them are overweight McDonalds fiends...and those who aren't fat/disgusting get taken as soon as they hit puberty. Your chances of finding an attractive, single, small town girl who is past jailbait age are pretty much nil. LMAO...sad but true. P.S. I thought Steve Perry wrote the title of this Thread...
Author USMCHokie Posted June 7, 2012 Author Posted June 7, 2012 What do u mean by shocked about what you do/did? What I do for a living...
Author USMCHokie Posted June 7, 2012 Author Posted June 7, 2012 The problem with small town girls is that most of them are overweight McDonalds fiends...and those who aren't fat/disgusting get taken as soon as they hit puberty. Your chances of finding an attractive, single, small town girl who is past jailbait age are pretty much nil. I'm not necessarily talking just about the pretty jailbait...but also the older ones who might not have gotten married yet or are divorced after marrying young...
SJC2008 Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 This thread reminds me of My Cousin Vinny. Especially when they first get down south and all the towns folk are gawking like their aliens lol. Pesci has a leather jacket on and Mariss Tomei's taking lics like she's in awe haha. 1
dasein Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 Average small towns (not upper middle suburbs), non-coastal, non "glamour" (Colorado, Virginia, some Fla) with no colleges tend to lose all their attractive women who don't get married out of HS fast to big cities IME. Some return, often with kids and emotional baggage in tow. Smaller college towns with some charm or cool factor can be different, but those are exceptions. This makes dating for average guys in small towns brutally competitive. There will usually be a handful of rich guys, whose families "own the town," or docs, lawyers or business owners, and all the socially aspiring young women will get in line, take a number and "share" those few. On the other side are the party girls lining up taking numbers and sharing tuquey type party dudes in crappy local bands and drug dealers. Ordinary guys get squeezed out entirely, lower their standards of acceptable fatness or date single mothers resulting from the inevitable post HS marriage divorces. One thing you see lots of in my area are cannonball sized huge shapeless women with normal, even good looking guys. Guys who are able to "win" an unfat woman who doesn't let herself go are considered the lucky ones, even if she's a b-tch or cheats on them.
veggirl Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 Average small towns (not upper middle suburbs), non-coastal, non "glamour" (Colorado, Virginia, some Fla) with no colleges tend to lose all their attractive women who don't get married out of HS fast to big cities IME. Some return, often with kids and emotional baggage in tow. Smaller college towns with some charm or cool factor can be different, but those are exceptions. This makes dating for average guys in small towns brutally competitive. There will usually be a handful of rich guys, whose families "own the town," or docs, lawyers or business owners, and all the socially aspiring young women will get in line, take a number and "share" those few. On the other side are the party girls lining up taking numbers and sharing tuquey type party dudes in crappy local bands and drug dealers. Ordinary guys get squeezed out entirely, lower their standards of acceptable fatness or date single mothers resulting from the inevitable post HS marriage divorces. One thing you see lots of in my area are cannonball sized huge shapeless women with normal, even good looking guys. Guys who are able to "win" an unfat woman who doesn't let herself go are considered the lucky ones, even if she's a b-tch or cheats on them. Right, and most of the men in small towns like you are describing are hicks, they are out of shape, and gross. So wouldn't dating be just as tought for a normal gal in this situation? 2
Negative Nancy Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 What I do for a living... what exactly is so spectacular about it that makes people "stare at you in awe"?
maybealone Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 When I meet or see women who either live in or are from small towns, more often than not, they are engaged or married at a very young age...and the explanation I often get is that there really isn't anything else to do in a small town except get married and start a family, especially if they have no way out. And from what I've seen, it doesn't take much to get a ring on their finger... I grew up in a small town and lived in a few others, and I think that explanation only fits for a handful of women I have known. The others are just doing what they want and what they know. They were raised by parents who married young and stayed in town and stayed close with their immediate family. The girls just tended to repeat this. I had many friends in high school who had no desire to go to college and whose biggest goal in life was to have a family. There is nothing wrong with that! And there are benefits to starting young -- they are now empty nesters in their early 40s with happy marriages and time to do whatever they want. Instead of having their kidless time in their 20s and 30s when money is typically tighter, they now have the resources to travel, start businesses, or just enjoy their families. Yes, there will always be parties girls and guys, and those that don't take care of themselves. But in my experience, it's more common to find girls and guys who were simply raised to know what they want and who didn't have the urge to move somewhere bigger and accomplish some list of things before starting a family.
Author USMCHokie Posted June 7, 2012 Author Posted June 7, 2012 what exactly is so spectacular about it that makes people "stare at you in awe"? Exactly...
FitChick Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 Dating is a numbers game. Fewer numbers in small towns.
iris219 Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 I'm an attractive, educated woman who's never been married and has no children who lives in a smallish town. The problem where I live is there are few single men and even fewer relationship worthy ones, so yes, women here are VERY willing to settle. I couldn't participate in the recent thread that asked what are your 5 dealbreakers because I don't have 5. I agree that most people get married early in small towns. It has to do with small town values. I would have loved to have gotten married 10 years ago, but I never met the right guy. We aren't all naive in small towns either. I have a Master's degree and I've lived in other places, so I can't imagine being amazed by a man's job, though I am impressed when a man is successful because I meet so few who are. It's very possible to met an intelligent, fit, sophisticated woman living in a small town, and it's almost a guarantee that she has no options when it comes to dating (raises hand). I do see women competing for the same moderately attractive dude in a local band, but they are by no means party girls, as dasein claimed. They are nice, normal women with no options. There are also women where I live who haven't dated in years. Unattractive, overweight women aren't getting average guys where I live. They are already paired up with unattractive, overweight guys. Hardly anyone is single where I live, and single men are much more rare than single women here.
dasein Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 Right, and most of the men in small towns like you are describing are hicks, they are out of shape, and gross. So wouldn't dating be just as tought for a normal gal in this situation? Nope, reason being that average and above average men don't flee the town in droves after graduation if they aren't married the way average and above women head straight to cities. The men are more likely to hang around, try to learn family businesses, start trade practice in the community. Since women don't do much trade practice and don't take much interest in "unglamorous" (but lucrative) businesses with blue collar elements, they take off, leaving lots of normal nonhick, in shape guys with limited prospects. Guys who don't like this given reality of small towns are certainly free to leave as well.
dasein Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 It's very possible to met an intelligent, fit, sophisticated woman living in a small town, and it's almost a guarantee that she has no options when it comes to dating (raises hand). Do you live in an actual small town? Or in a suburb? Have seen you posting these laments about where you live before, am puzzled by them, and think them anomalous in comparison to my and other male experience in small towns. Based on life experience and friends' in small towns, I can list maybe 100 towns and small cities where it's a certain fact you, or at least you and a significant number of women like you, don't live.
iris219 Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 Do you live in an actual small town? Or in a suburb? Have seen you posting these laments about where you live before, am puzzled by them, and think them anomalous in comparison to my and other male experience in small towns. Based on life experience and friends' in small towns, I can list maybe 100 towns and small cities where it's a certain fact you, or at least you and a significant number of women like you, don't live. I live in a smallish city. The population is a little under 100,000 and a lot of these people are older and retired. No, I don't live in a hick town where there's a main street and one stoplight, and I don't live in a suburb either. Your posts baffle me as well, as they are entirely contrary to my experiences.
Star Gazer Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 What I do for a living... Small town women are shocked you're in the military? Why would that shock them? Most bases are in smaller towns/cities. You live in one.
Author USMCHokie Posted June 7, 2012 Author Posted June 7, 2012 Small town women are shocked you're in the military? Why would that shock them? Most bases are in smaller towns/cities. You live in one. No, I'm talking podunk Midwest towns...
Star Gazer Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 No, I'm talking podunk Midwest towns... You mean where the majority of our service men and women come from? I'm sorry, but I'm failing to understand how anyone in this country, small town or major metropolis, would be shocked to meet or in awe of a member of the military who's below an O-5 or not a pilot, particularly one who's never fought overseas and has been stateside his entire career. It just confuses me. Nothing personal.
Author USMCHokie Posted June 7, 2012 Author Posted June 7, 2012 You mean where the majority of our service men and women come from? I'm sorry, but I'm failing to understand how anyone in this country, small town or major metropolis, would be shocked to meet or in awe of a member of the military who's below an O-5 or not a pilot, particularly one who's never fought overseas and has been stateside his entire career. It just confuses me. Nothing personal. On top of my two other professional licenses/accreditations...again, a dime a dozen in DC, but not so common in small town America...
mortensorchid Posted June 8, 2012 Posted June 8, 2012 I had the reverse happen to me. I had an LDR with a man for nearly two years, he was a small town boy and I am the city girl. That was never an issue with me and him, I accepted him (and most people) no matter what their situation may be. However, I do find with people who are from small towns or rural areas tend not to be exposed to a lot of things that those in cities are. The further away you go from metropolitan areas, the people tend to be far more conservative, have more traditional values, and be less open to trying new or different things than what they have been exposed to. I also worked for a company where I was a customer service rep. I talked to people who lived so far off the beaten path they didn't even have mail delivery at their homes. They had a post office box in a town that could be over fifty miles away, they would get to town once a month to do their shopping and whatnot. Remember that those who live in small towns or rural areas choose to live like this. Most people moved to and created cities because they did not choose to live like this. As to why most from small towns or rural areas get married as young as they do, it's because they don't have many options. There are some who go onto college or join the army in order to see more of the world, but those who choose not to go back to their home towns are going down the same path as those around them. It's about what you know or what you think they know. Never assume anything with anyone.
kaylan Posted June 8, 2012 Posted June 8, 2012 (edited) I live in a smallish city. The population is a little under 100,000 and a lot of these people are older and retired. No, I don't live in a hick town where there's a main street and one stoplight, and I don't live in a suburb either. Your posts baffle me as well, as they are entirely contrary to my experiences. 100 k is not too bad...and I cant understand how youre not meeting men. I live in a city of around 40 k. However Im in a suburb of NYC, so theres plenty of towns and what not nearby and several social hubs (not including NYC) within driving distance where I can meet women. I mean Id imagine you have surrounding areas, in addition to your own city of 100k, that has a fair number of singles in it. Maybe move to a metro area with population reaching towards 500k or a million? Edited June 8, 2012 by kaylan
Ruby Slippers Posted June 8, 2012 Posted June 8, 2012 When I visit my small Texas hometown, I do notice a lot of overweight, frumpy women with cute, in-shape guys who work their butts off to keep the women happy. It's the same thing when I see couples come into the city for Cubs games from the 'burbs - a lot of overweight, frumpy women with cute, in-shape guys. Those guys covertly check out us stylish, in-shape city girls, the wives look pissed off, and most of them look like they're kind of hating life.
Author USMCHokie Posted June 8, 2012 Author Posted June 8, 2012 When I visit my small Texas hometown, I do notice a lot of overweight, frumpy women with cute, in-shape guys who work their butts off to keep the women happy. It's the same thing when I see couples come into the city for Cubs games from the 'burbs - a lot of overweight, frumpy women with cute, in-shape guys. Those guys covertly check out us stylish, in-shape city girls, the wives look pissed off, and most of them look like they're kind of hating life. So do you think there's a power dynamic between men and women from small towns? Your observations seem to suggest that women who stay in town have the advantage over men who stay in town...or is it independent of gender and just depends on the individuals...?
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