broken-and-lost Posted June 6, 2012 Posted June 6, 2012 I saw my ex yesterday in the cinema been over a year since i've seen her i didn't know she was there i sat 6 seats away from her and i think she was with her new guy it totally threw me i had a major panic attack. I actually sat there for two hours as i couldn't bring myself to get up as i was with a friend. It was the worse two hours of my life i was doing really well thought i was getting over things it's been about 18 months since we split i thought i was learning to cope with her loss but seeing her has just reminded me how much i'm still in love with her. I'm total mess today i have so many mixed feelings for this girl seeing her acting like she use to with me all her little movements the way she reacted to scenes in the film just brought it all back i felt like a stranger watching something that i use to be in like frozen in time looking in on myself only it wasn't me sitting their was someone else. How am i ever going to get over this girl when in my heart i know she is the only one i really want to be in my life i'm not a young guy so this is not a first love issue i'm in my 30s i've done every thing people say you should do to move on yet one moment is all it's taken to me see that this girl is all i've ever wanted in my life how do you get away from that. what should i do, can you leave the rest of your life alone knowing that person is out their have i ruined my life letting her get away??
Philosoraptor Posted June 6, 2012 Posted June 6, 2012 You continue to give it time. A test I feel works is to imagine your ex doing everything they did with you, and everything you wanted to do with them, with someone else. When that no longer has any sting you are truly over things. Just pick yourself back up and continue to work on making your own dreams come true.
Renard99 Posted June 6, 2012 Posted June 6, 2012 (edited) I wouldn't think about it too much, simply accept what just happen and try to get back to the way you were a few days ago, before you went to the cinema. I had a very similar experience a few days back. I signed up to a dating site ages ago that had 2 parts to it. One was regular long term relationship dating and the other was 'adult encounters' and one night stands. As soon as I found out the second was just basically for sex I abandoned it but that didn't stop them sending me emails trying to get me to sign up fully. The emails said something along the lines of 'Look what you're missing... Here's someone we think you'll have a lot of fun with'......... Only problem was that the person featured was clearly my ex wearing very little! Despite having broken up 18 months ago, not seen her for over 9 months now and not having thought of her at all for about 4 or 5 months, it still made me feel like a mess. I felt like you in the sense that it was like I was looking at my ex from a different perspective. Seeing her in lingerie was something once reserved for me, yet now it's not for me and is indeed for other men. The silly thing is that I can see i'm better off without her now and wouldn't have her back even if she wanted to try again. Yet it still effected me. I know you're in a slightly different position in that you feel your ex is the one, but I used to feel the same way about my ex, yet I'm now with someone new who has absolutely blown me away. I always believe that everyone has more than just one 'the one' out there. There are so many people in the world, surely the odds of having more than one perfect match are more in our favour? It's like the film you went to see..... maybe you have a favourite but how do you know that the next film you see won't blow you away and become your new favourite? These women have hit many of us quite deep inside......We just have to let the sands of time get to work. Edited June 6, 2012 by Renard99
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