heatherfeather Posted May 30, 2012 Posted May 30, 2012 I am feeling lonely and wish I had a rebound relationship right now.
Author heatherfeather Posted May 31, 2012 Author Posted May 31, 2012 Well at least someone to take my mind off of things....my family doesn't really live around me ...parents live in two different states and siblings all live in other places that are far from me. Friends all have their own families etc and I don't really feel like going to the bar.
Philosoraptor Posted May 31, 2012 Posted May 31, 2012 A rebound will do nothing but delay your pain. Find a group around you that does some of the same things you are interested in. Meetup.com is a good place to start.
Mack05 Posted May 31, 2012 Posted May 31, 2012 (edited) Rebound relationships are never the answer. They just delay the pain and more often than not cause you worse grief further down the line.. The key to building a successful relationship is to build the foundation slowly. Despite what some delusional posters on this site post, relationships are not easy. If the relationship is not built up in the correct way, then it is doomed to failure. Too many people (me included) have amazing honeymoon periods. These relationships more often then not (as Philo says) are built on wishes and hopes, more than having an actual foundation. Too many times I see people post on this site about their ex's emotionally checking out. They checked out because the communication in the relationship was poor and the dumper didn't have the emotional maturity to communicate their fears, when things started to go wrong in the relationship. They fell out of love, quicker then they feel in love, because more often then not the dumper has no idea what the word 'Love' truly entails. They view you awesomely at the start only to flick the switch and view you overly negatively when things go wrong. These are relationships with emotionally immature people you need to avoid. Use this time to grow emotionally. When you look after yourself, you will learn the relevant tools on how to build something special in the right way. Looking for a rebound is looking for the easy way out. You are looking to avoid instead of confront. People that 'avoid' bounce from relationship to relationship (getting more and more bitter along the way) wondering why it fails every time after a seemingly great start.. Believe me there are better choices to be made.. Edited May 31, 2012 by Mack05 1
Chi townD Posted May 31, 2012 Posted May 31, 2012 You have to do what I did. Join a club (like a cycling club or a kayaking club) or co-ed sports, or volunteer your time. You need to keep busy. When you do these things, you never know who you're going to meet along the way!
Tree_Salmon Posted May 31, 2012 Posted May 31, 2012 You have to do what I did. Join a club (like a cycling club or a kayaking club) or co-ed sports, or volunteer your time. You need to keep busy. When you do these things, you never know who you're going to meet along the way! Do something you're passionate about or have been too busy/afraid to do. There is so much more to discover out in the world. Build something now and if this breakup thing ever happens to you again you'll have a great outlet.
raebee Posted May 31, 2012 Posted May 31, 2012 forget what all these people are saying . a rebound is exactly what you need , UNLESS youre a sucker and all youre going to do is fall for that person too .
Chi townD Posted May 31, 2012 Posted May 31, 2012 Yeah, believe me when I say this. If all your doing is getting up and going to work; coming home; eating dinner; watch a little TV then going to bed only to repeat the same process the next day. That WILL put you in a funk. You need to get out of the norm. Grab a single girlfriend and plan a trip. Go somewhere. Get excited about something. Go somewhere nice and warm, with a beach.....and a hammock.....and a margarita......with flip flops......with a nice ocean breeze...... Damn...now I want to leave work....
Author heatherfeather Posted May 31, 2012 Author Posted May 31, 2012 I just did that by tubbing down the river last sunday with some girlfriends of mine... It is during the week when everyone has their own families and other crap to deal with that I wish I had something to do. Yes I already volunteer and do other stuff.
Chi townD Posted May 31, 2012 Posted May 31, 2012 well then, you know what? It's okay to be lonely. It's okay to be by yourself for a while. Yeah, being lonely sucks. But when you're happy being by yourself, when you finally meet someone, it's because you WANT to be with him and not because you NEED to be with him.
Author heatherfeather Posted May 31, 2012 Author Posted May 31, 2012 I wish I had my own family and kids of my own... Kinda jealous of those who have this. It is everything that I want right now.
Chi townD Posted May 31, 2012 Posted May 31, 2012 Yeah, but you don't want to have those things with the wrong person just for the sake of having them. I truely believe that there's a guy out there for you. That fits you and your personality. And he's trying to find you right now. So, give it time and enjoy life, he'll find you when you least expect it.
Recommended Posts