Author Philosoraptor Posted July 13, 2012 Author Posted July 13, 2012 Wow, I wish you two a life long happiness together!!! Haha thank you, we shall see. I could see her being the future Mrs. Philosoraptor. Probably one of those movie moments when you shout 'I LOVE YOU' when the music stops suddenly and everyone looks at you on the dance floor Knowing me it will happen at the most awkward but perfect time. I've always been good at making things memorable and interesting. Enjoy it, this part is one of my favorites! Hope everything works out! I shall enjoy Thank you.
Radu Posted July 13, 2012 Posted July 13, 2012 Have you thought about teasing her into it ? Like doing something she likes a lot but stopping just short of doing it, then turning to her and say 'say it or i won't do it' ... and have her keep trying untill she says 'i love you'.
Author Philosoraptor Posted July 13, 2012 Author Posted July 13, 2012 Have you thought about teasing her into it ? Like doing something she likes a lot but stopping just short of doing it, then turning to her and say 'say it or i won't do it' ... and have her keep trying untill she says 'i love you'. Nah, I'd rather just let things happen naturally and not be coerced in any way. I'll wait patiently and see what the world offers me. It could be said today, maybe months from now. I trust that my heart will know the right moment and I'll just go with it. Worst it can do is freak her out and make her take off... but as long as I'm true to myself I'll have no reason to regret anything. 2
Author Philosoraptor Posted July 14, 2012 Author Posted July 14, 2012 Well it looks like this ride is about to come to an end. I brought her dinner at work last night and things were good. Today she let me know at the last minute (when I was expecting her at my door) that our plans were canceled. I asked her to please let me know in the future earlier so I can make other arrangements (no aggression at all). We had plans or so I thought to see each other all weekend and now she needs a little time to figure out what she wants... yet she wanted to commit. I called her to make sure all was good and she sounded fine so I let it go and she said she would ding me when she went on her break. Well her break came and went, nothing. Being the optimist I am I tried to find reasons for it and assumed maybe her phone battery died or whatever, but she had plenty of time to play on Facebook so it seems. Pretty sure I'm about to get royally ****ed.
miss_jaclynrae Posted July 14, 2012 Posted July 14, 2012 Well it looks like this ride is about to come to an end. I brought her dinner at work last night and things were good. Today she let me know at the last minute (when I was expecting her at my door) that our plans were canceled. I asked her to please let me know in the future earlier so I can make other arrangements (no aggression at all). We had plans or so I thought to see each other all weekend and now she needs a little time to figure out what she wants... yet she wanted to commit. I called her to make sure all was good and she sounded fine so I let it go and she said she would ding me when she went on her break. Well her break came and went, nothing. Being the optimist I am I tried to find reasons for it and assumed maybe her phone battery died or whatever, but she had plenty of time to play on Facebook so it seems. Pretty sure I'm about to get royally ****ed. Did she actually SAY that? Or are you assuming it because she cancelled?
Radu Posted July 14, 2012 Posted July 14, 2012 Did she actually SAY that? Or are you assuming it because she cancelled? It's a feeling you have when you have dealt with enough flaky girls. Basically, if someone wants you, they will make time to continue the link with you or change it to another more flexible form. If it's what i think it is, kinda ****ty it happened after almost 1.5months of dating.
miss_jaclynrae Posted July 14, 2012 Posted July 14, 2012 It's a feeling you have when you have dealt with enough flaky girls. Basically, if someone wants you, they will make time to continue the link with you or change it to another more flexible form. If it's what i think it is, kinda ****ty it happened after almost 1.5months of dating. I disagree, then again, I don't know her personally. I have cancelled dates last minute, and have forgotten phone calls as well. Then again, my job is one where this can happen... a LOT. I do usually try to ensure the guy that I hope we can reschedule though. I know this may be the hopeful side of me, but I wouldn't write her off completely...
Eternal Sunshine Posted July 14, 2012 Posted July 14, 2012 Well it looks like this ride is about to come to an end. I brought her dinner at work last night and things were good. Today she let me know at the last minute (when I was expecting her at my door) that our plans were canceled. I asked her to please let me know in the future earlier so I can make other arrangements (no aggression at all). We had plans or so I thought to see each other all weekend and now she needs a little time to figure out what she wants... yet she wanted to commit. I called her to make sure all was good and she sounded fine so I let it go and she said she would ding me when she went on her break. Well her break came and went, nothing. Being the optimist I am I tried to find reasons for it and assumed maybe her phone battery died or whatever, but she had plenty of time to play on Facebook so it seems. Pretty sure I'm about to get royally ****ed. I hope she comes around. Don't freak out just yet, you seem like a pretty level-headed guy. You need more information to figure out what's really going on.
Author Philosoraptor Posted July 14, 2012 Author Posted July 14, 2012 (edited) Did she actually SAY that? Or are you assuming it because she cancelled? Her words. I know she needs to figure out what she wants as it's a vibe I've always read from her, even told her and she agreed. I've been very patient and understanding. Wouldn't have bothered me at all if she hadn't just dropped the entire weekend (our only real time to do anything as she works mids). I hope she comes around. Don't freak out just yet, you seem like a pretty level-headed guy. You need more information to figure out what's really going on. I am very level headed but lets call a spade a spade here. If you want to be with someone you'll make time, not skip out on the only time you have. That's where the issue is. Not that she needs to think, but she has plenty of time to think and chose to do it during the plans we had. She didn't even need to tell me she had to think, could have done it all during the week. It reads as an avoidance maneuver, which brings us back around to the original point. If you want to be with someone you'll make an effort. Edited July 14, 2012 by Philosoraptor
tigressA Posted July 14, 2012 Posted July 14, 2012 Her words. I know she needs to figure out what she wants as it's a vibe I've always read from her, even told her and she agreed. I've been very patient and understanding. Wouldn't have bothered me at all if she hadn't just dropped the entire weekend (our only real time to do anything as she works mids). I am very level headed but lets call a spade a spade here. If you want to be with someone you'll make time, not skip out on the only time you have. That's where the issue is. Not that she needs to think, but she has plenty of time to think and chose to do it during the plans we had. She didn't even need to tell me she had to think, could have done it all during the week. It reads as an avoidance maneuver, which brings us back around to the original point. If you want to be with someone you'll make an effort. I'm in total agreement. Also, when she said she'd get back to you but didn't, and then was on Facebook, that's another flag. After more than a month of dating, this behavior says absolutely nothing good. Looks like you should be prepping for an exit from her. Sorry to say it, as you've been so happy.
Eternal Sunshine Posted July 14, 2012 Posted July 14, 2012 OK let me ask you; 1. Did anything change in the dynamic/interaction between the two of you leading up to this weekend? 2. Do you think there is a possibility of her ex or third party involvement?
Author Philosoraptor Posted July 14, 2012 Author Posted July 14, 2012 (edited) I'm in total agreement. Also, when she said she'd get back to you but didn't, and then was on Facebook, that's another flag. After more than a month of dating, this behavior says absolutely nothing good. Looks like you should be prepping for an exit from her. Sorry to say it, as you've been so happy. Well she did finally get to me after 11 last night. Just a text asking how my night was. Seems like the message was more "oh crap I said I would but I forgot so I better do something". But yea, I'm reading an exit too. OK let me ask you; 1. Did anything change in the dynamic/interaction between the two of you leading up to this weekend? 2. Do you think there is a possibility of her ex or third party involvement? No, things were really good just the day before when I brought her dinner at work. I actually thought things were getting even closer because we had a pretty good conversation about us. All of her friends and coworkers kepy saying "he's a keeper" to her (with me present) after meeting me. Not sure if there is a third party but she doesn't seem like that kind of girl. I guess there is always the possibility that everything she's said to me is true and she just needs a bit of time to think... but everything seems so avoidant so I'm not holding onto much hope. I've set my boundaries for this and I plan on sticking to them. I've been plenty patient but that has a limit as well. I don't waste anyone else's time and I expect the same respect. Edited July 14, 2012 by Philosoraptor 1
Els Posted July 14, 2012 Posted July 14, 2012 What was the reason given for the initial last-minute cancellation?
Author Philosoraptor Posted July 14, 2012 Author Posted July 14, 2012 What was the reason given for the initial last-minute cancellation? The cancellation yesterday isn't really the issue. She goes to the gym near me and woke up late so she had no plans to go, therefore would not be stopping by after. She works right by my house so had she still wanted to see me it wouldn't have been out of the way at all, and she had planned on being here anyways already. She knew well beforehand that she wasn't coming but didn't let me know until about the time I was expecting her to arrive. But still, I let that go. The issue started when I asked her if we had plans for the weekend and they disappeared.
Author Philosoraptor Posted July 15, 2012 Author Posted July 15, 2012 Well it's over. We'll continue here: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/335708-one-burnt-raptor#post4117706
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