DjinnAgain Posted May 29, 2012 Posted May 29, 2012 There is no secret that I am not suited for casual sex and I am looking for a long term relationship; That I prefer putting family first and that I want more children... I am a romantic at heart. I like nice guys. But the 5th date is too soon to expound on our life together as you envision it and suggest we marry. (5th date in a very short time period, and only two were all day dates) I really like him though and thought there was something real forming, but now I feel as if he likes the idea of the traditional life suggested more than who I am as a person... I don't know if he'll be back. I thought he was joking at first and laughed. That was not the right reaction, since he was serious. I wasn't trying to hurt him. But he doesn't know me well enough. Emotions are always high early on. There may be soul mates; but I don't think I believe in love at first sight like he was referring too. I hope he comes back and slower. He is a little older than me, but this still is a bit much for impatience... I think I hope, anyways.
Lil1 Posted May 29, 2012 Posted May 29, 2012 Not sure if youre looking for advice but I agree with you that it is waaay too soon to start talking about marriage! Regardless of age you need to know each other well first and that doesn't happen within 5 dates! Follow your instinct because it's leading you in the right direction! 1
Balzac Posted May 29, 2012 Posted May 29, 2012 I see that you are venting here. How do you plan to communicate your feelings with this man?
xpaperxcutx Posted May 29, 2012 Posted May 29, 2012 Men who move too fast are usually the ones who back off fast. Most men can say things they don't mean either to get on your good side or to get you into their bed. Men are charmers and women tend to be more emotionally invested by lies. What does his body languange tell you? What does his actions say? Again men say things they don't mean. Only their actions tell _everything. 3
wordrock Posted May 30, 2012 Posted May 30, 2012 A female friend of mine got married to her husband after they had only known one another for a couple weeks. It's been 3 years and they get along great. It's a nice story to hear and they explain it as "we just knew". He proposed on their first date. On the other hand, I've known a dozen or so people who got engaged and married within a few months of knowing their partner and all their marriages ended terribly. I'm one of those people. My personal opinion is that a couple should focus on seeing if they can manage to live with one another for at least a year without the whole thing blowing up in their faces. After all, you don't have to be married to be in love, and you don't have to be married to live together. While trying to discuss plans is not the same thing, it's certainly preemptive on his part... Talking about getting married during a time when he should be trying to get to know and understand you, while encouraging and helping you to understand him is not romantic! It's perfectly normal for you to feel put off by it. Romantic would be him working it out on his own, judging over a period of time that you'd be receptive to a proposal, and then proposing. Ie, giving you time to think about YOUR future on your own, not planning it for you. I'd be very leery of him.
daphne Posted May 30, 2012 Posted May 30, 2012 I once had a guy roll it out on the 2nd date. That was our last date. Sometimes, a guy really knows what he wants. Most of the time, however, he's desperate to charm the pants off of you. If he is sincere, he'll be back and slow his roll. One guy did that, and was very patient. Unfortunately, we just weren't compatible in the end.
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