peacefuldreamer Posted June 27, 2004 Posted June 27, 2004 I talked to my ex earlier today and we talked about working things out. How happy I was. I still love him what can I say. Well we were interrupted by his step dad and he said he would call me back. I waited... and waited.... and waited. Finally at about 2:30 ( we hung up at about 6:30) he got online. I had just sent him an email because I felt guilty about not appreciating the nice things he did. At first he was making excuses not to call. Thats really nothing new lately. Then he started accusing me of sleeping with his best friend. I already knew about the accusation but it was 2 years ago and I thought we got past it. He said that if I didnt tell him the truth he wouldnt talk to me again. So I did I told him it never happened. Of course he didnt believe me. He kept saying that if I didnt tell him he wouldnt talk to me anymore and I kept telling him that it didnt happen. Well he decided that even though I have always been honest with him that I was lying I guess cause he said goodbye and thats the last I heard. I dont know how or if I can prove to him that this never happened especially since its my word against his friends. I dont even know if I will ever get a chance to prove it. I do know that I am innocent and that I love him. This is breaking my heart more than anything he has ever done to me.
Fancy Posted June 27, 2004 Posted June 27, 2004 You will continue feeling pathetic as long as you remain in contact with this guy. He's your ex! You have absolutely nothing to "prove" to him. Why are you allowing him to manipulate you like that? Don't want to feel pathetic anymore? Then block the bum from your email and instant messenger and don't answer the phone if he calls. Today is a new day. Gather your strength, look ahead rather than backwards, and leave him behind. No good will come of being in contact with him. This latest incident is living proof of that.
amanda25 Posted June 27, 2004 Posted June 27, 2004 I agree, you shouldn't worry about it, no reason too...And I'll just about bet anything that eventually he will call, or email ya..why? Cuz ive been through that 'Dumb game' of tell me or i wont talk to ya again..Its kinda like some times if we think the other is cheating and we can't exactly prove it, then we basically accuse them of it and tell them either admit to it (even if ya didnt do it)(and YES that is stupid!)or Ill threaten ya (not gonna talk to ya) until you do say you did it... Sounds like the insecurities are within himself..You told him you didnt do anything..If he don't believe ya, then thats on him, not you! Don't worry about it..Be stubborn like him, and dont give in by calling him or whatever....My opinion...lol Good Luck
Author peacefuldreamer Posted June 27, 2004 Author Posted June 27, 2004 Yes he is my EX but up til a month ago we were planning our wedding. He is still the love of my life and thats not very easy to just "turn off". I am feeling today that he is probably feeling guilty about something. He likes to start fights when he has something to tell me that he doesnt know how to or that he knows I will get mad about. I left him an email last night before I went to bed. He had just left me one this morning when I got online saying pretty much the same thing he said last night. That he doesnt believe me and to leave him alone. I am having a really tough time not emailing him. I dont understand what this is all about and its confusing. I just want to know what happened between 6:30 and 2:30 that hes being like this over. Maybe I shouldnt care but I do after all I do love him and I was extremely happy when we talked about working things out.
amanda25 Posted June 27, 2004 Posted June 27, 2004 "He is still the love of my life and thats not very easy to just "turn off"." "THe likes to start fights when he has something to tell me that he doesnt know how to or that he knows I will get mad about. " [color=green][/color] You are right, you cant just turn love "off", and you can't pick and choose who you fall in love with, but you CAN pick and choose how many times you are going to let one man hurt you...And that fighiting when he does something wrong or does something he knows you will get mad about, what is that? A MAN thing?? Mine use to do that too!! We can't make up your mind for you, we are only giving our opinions...Take it for what you want, in the end, its you that has to make the decision and live with it... Anyhow, good luck, hope it all works out for ya!!
reasontosigh Posted June 27, 2004 Posted June 27, 2004 I'm wondering about this accusation thing. Who put the idea in your ex's head in the first place? And after 2 years is this person still going around saying this? Is that why it hasn't died down by now? And just what is his best friend saying? If he said he hadn't done anything with you and your ex can't believe his own best friend, his problems may be bigger than you think.
Author peacefuldreamer Posted June 27, 2004 Author Posted June 27, 2004 I guess I am just using this so I can vent and wont end up emailing him or something like that. It helps though to have people tell me not to put up with him lol. Even if you are all strangers. My friends have been telling me for years. Well when I still had contact with them. Our relationship is far from healthy. I guess I just keep telling myself he will change and everything will get better. You would think after 3 years I would know better lol. I have to say thanks you saved me by replying right now cause I was just about to email him.
Author peacefuldreamer Posted June 27, 2004 Author Posted June 27, 2004 Well a couple years back we were split up for a month or so. HIs friend was at the same bar as me one night and tried to get me to go home with him. Which I didnt do. After that he told my fiance that I slept with him. I dont know how or why it got brought up last night though. For all I know hes still saying it. Honestly though I think he was just trying to find something to fight with me about. I am thinking that he probably slept with someone last night and feels guilty so he has to make me feel terrible too. I never know with him but he does do that. I am starting to seriously think he needs counseling. He went from saying he took his step dad to the hospital and when I asked why he jumped to accusing me of this again. It doesnt make any sense to me. I want so bad to call him and ask him what the hell happened but I cant do that. Thats the easy part not emailing him is more difficult.
reasontosigh Posted June 27, 2004 Posted June 27, 2004 We are always happy to be of assistance here. Venting here is a good way to resist any number of temptations, and quite a few of us do just that, so by all means feel free!
reasontosigh Posted June 27, 2004 Posted June 27, 2004 Between his own insecurities and having a best friend like that, your ex sure doesn't need any more enemies than he's already got, huh? Ugh.
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