My girlfriend keeps hurting me..

[rence10]

hello to all of you..i'm new to this site..can anyone help me with my problem?

so here it is.i got a girlfriend named Miya, we've been dating for almost 7 months now.i really,REALLY love her.i try to show that to her everyday.i try really hard,i really do.but for some reason,she keeps on hurting me.she sometimes texts me(because you know,she's busy..her parents are really strict so she doesn't go out very much..we don't go out that much so all we can do is text each other)that she's with another guy,and she says they are kissing.on rare cases she even says she let lets herself be f*****.and in the end i get really sad depressed and sometimes even mad.when i get to that state she says it's not true,but i still feel a bit uneasy somehow.i don't think she's up to something bad like cheating or something,but it just bothers me that she just keeps on hurting me.when i first asked her out,the few first weeks were all good.sure we got to the ups and downs but we managed.but when time passed,she changed.she hurts me for no real reason.she's like"hey baby,i love you" then she's like "i don't care about you anymore.i got someone else now.just go die".even if it's not true she keeps on saying that.and she got tons of crushes just this summer..

despite my effort to make her feel that i love her,she just blows it away by hurting me.she sometimes make me feel i'm replaced in her heart.like i'm not important to her.now iv'e been hurt countless times in my past(all in purpose) by the girls i loved.but miya hurt me more than all of those girls put together.just today,in the morning she greeted me good morning with a signature attached to the end of the message "mac".i asked her what or who was that. she said it was her new crush.when i asked"why do you have so many crushes?am i not enough for you?" she didn't reply for 3 hours.and when she finally did reply she said"hm".that's it'just a simple "hm" and completely avoided my question.and then when i asked her what was she doing she said she was doing nothing.nothing at all.and get this:she said she was going to have sex with another guy,and wanted to invite me for a threesome.hell no.then she said she was just joking.sometimes i think i'm just a toy that she plays with.my emotions are like toys to her.she treats me like i have no emotions at all and she can say whatever she wants.i did everything for her and yet she still does this to me...how can i make her stop?what should i do? i hope someone can help me..our monthsary is coming up too..

[d'Arthez]

She emotionally abusing you. Either you tell her to stop (not likely to sort an effect), or you break up with her. Because she will keep on hurting you if you don't. It is better to walk away from a bad relationship.

 

You are still young. You will find someone else, someone who does not abuse you, and loves you for who you are.

[Teal]

Why are you even with her? Leave.

 

There's no magical solution to make someone of piss-poor character who doesn't care about you treat you with respect and consideration. As with everyone in abusive relationships, you either sit and take it or you walk. It's best to leave now before those hooks are in deep and lasting damage is done to you.

[Balzac]

Scrape up some self respect buddy. She's abusing you and disrespecting you in a massive attack. What are you thinking? Walk away. There are girls who would value your love, respect you and treat you like a man.

[rence10]

hello again everyone...thanks for all your replies..guess what..she broke up with me..for no reason.

we were texting each other.everything was good,really good.then she didin't reply for some time,then she said"let's break up ok."when she said that i thought she was lying.i was writing her a letter,then suddenly i fell asleep because of my fever.my cousin texted her to update her on my current state.she asked if i took my medicine.my cousin said yes,blah blah blah.then she told my cousin to tell me to find another girl.and she doesn't want me anymore.when my cousin told me that i thought he was lying too.he showed me his phone and text messages with my miya.i tried to compose my emotions and asked her myself.no reply up to now.haha..she broke my stupid heart..this was the first time i really got serious with a girl.i met her parents and bonded with them.i did everything to show her i really love her.but she just made it look like i'm worth nothing.i don't know if i can move on with this kind of pain..makes me feel like i dont want to love ever again..

again, thanks for your replies..thank you all.

:'(

[d'Arthez]

It hurts now, but she would have kept on hurting you with her behavior towards you.

 

Try to spend time with real friends, people who care about you. Do things you used to enjoy, try to distract yourself. Try not to think too much about your ex, and definitely don't contact her. Not only will she hurt you again and again, it will also stop you from getting over her.

[Radu]

She emotionally abusing you. Either you tell her to stop (not likely to sort an effect), or you break up with her. Because she will keep on hurting you if you don't. It is better to walk away from a bad relationship.

 

You are still young. You will find someone else, someone who does not abuse you, and loves you for who you are.

 

This, spot on.

 

OP, i know it will hurt but i want you to print out all of your text conversation where she is abusive to you.

And keep them.

They will help you :

- when you feel down and think you do too little

- when you find another girl like her [knock on wood ... i really hope you don't]

- if and when [mostly when], she spins this around in front of your friends ... she is an emotional bully so she will do this

 

Funny enough, doing this and taking a stand against her, putting her out of your mind will actually make her feel attracted to you.

It hurts now, but in time it will get better and hopefully you learned a good lesson ... which is best learned early in life instead of later.

 

PS: How old were you 2 ?

[boytoy]

Wow. She sounds like a horrible human being. You should either forget about her, as she is not worth it, or you can try to take revenge first and then forget about her. For revenge, I recommend shaming her in your community / social circle / highschool / whatever. Definitely save all her texts. Assuming you two are in highschool (it sounds like you are really young), a brutal vengeance can be exacted by sending all her text messages to her parents and family. If you don't want to be as cruel, you can select some of the text messages that are very embarrassing to her but don't make you look like a chump, and share them with her friends and social circle so that they realize what an abusive person she is.

 

And for all those who are going to say that taking revenge is somehow "sinking to her level," I will argue that abusive people need to be shamed to stop them from doing this to others in the future. Who here would object to Chris Brown being shamed for beating up Rihanna? This is not too different...

[rence10]

thanks guys..but i cant really take revenge on her..

right now, i cant..but maybe i will.

thanks guys.you really helped

[Feelin Frisky]

Could you really love someone that delights in your misery? I don't think so. What you have is not love for HER--it's love for the image you created for her before you knew her true cruelty. Take a lesson from this about yourself and her and close her out of your life before you lose even more.