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Broke NC.... damn

Insanityshorse

By Insanityshorse
in Second Chances

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Insanityshorse Member

Insanityshorse

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So, my ex and I have a mutual friend who still 3 weeks later does not know we broke up. She works at a bar where everyone knows both of us and we decided to keep it quiet so that we did not have to explain or talk about it. She is a pretty private person. Anyway, I went over to his place to help him remove some siding from his house. Afterward we wanted to go grab a beer and went to a bar that is his hang out that is 5 blocks away from where my ex works. I got a ride with him so I had no car. I didn't think anything of it because she was working and obviously wouldn't come down there. Well, another friend shows up and they decide they want to go down to her work to say hi and hang out. Now I'm in a **** spot. So I told them that I needed to go run some errands and to give me a call when they were done. Well, obviously they said something about hanging out with me while they were there because she ended up calling me last night.

 

It was a fine conversation and nothing heart felt or anything was discussed. I know we are both still trying to get our emotional legs under us.

 

Today though, god damn I just feel totally bummed and lonely. I know I should just man up but I really miss that girl.

 

Guess I just needed to vent to someone other than close friends. No damage was really done by us talking last night, but it definitely still hurts. I guess that's the damage, I feel crappy today.

 

On top of this my ex of 5 years, who I've been broken up with for 3 years. I broke off all contact with her over a year ago when I started dating the new girl, who is now my ex. It's like she smells blood in the water or something. She has been texting and calling me a lot. I spoke with her 1 time on the phone and she told me she'd been wanting to call me for so long and that she thinks about me all the time. I don't think that she wants to get back together, and honestly I would not allow that to happen. I don't want to be with her. My question though is 2 fold. One, if I allow her to be my friend again I run the risk of having to cut her off again when a new girl comes around, or if my current ex and I reconciliate.... and that is totally not fair is it? Two, if my current ex found out that I was now talking with her she would really be upset, and that's not really fair either is it? So do I cut her off and make sure she knows that we can't really be friends talking all the time?

Edited by Insanityshorse
BDranger Member

BDranger

Posted
Posted

What do you want? This is your life. You can't rely on reconcile, your ex from 5 years ago...who knows what she's really looking for...This is YOUR decision. be honest with both of your Ex's with your intent. Make it clear.

 

"I run the risk of having to cut her off again when a new girl comes around."

 

This is what you said and I think you're about half right. If neither of these girls are "the one" then what are you doing waiting around for them? Are you really going to, wait, for them to get a clear conscious?

 

Good luck. I didn't want to sugar coat it, just be clear but nice when you do deliver the message.

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