I can't but feel betrayed. Nothing bad has happened but i'm jealous as hell.

[DavidNarn]

Well. I feel like i'm in a pretty damn good relationship. We have our ups and downs. Mostly ups. We only argue about a few things hardly. But mainly it's my jealousy.

 

We get SO close then get kinda distant for a week then, again, SO close, lovey, just kinda back and forth. When we are distant i just mean like not as lovey as the previous week. This is the same guy who has posted here before about jealousy. I get jealous of her liking guys' photos on facebook, her giving her number out ( when the guy asks ) and also when she texts old guy friends she had sexual relations with. There has only been four or so including me so its a big deal when she does that. SEX though full on i'm her second.

 

Well yesterday was probably the most lovey we have ever been in our 8 months of dating. we were sooo happy all day then we started talking about our future, spending our lives together, kids etc. not COMPLETE SERIOUS talk but we both were really happy talking about it and it's in our minds thats for sure.

 

Well today i was with her and she just got a random text from some guy i have never heard his name before. it didnt bother me too much till i got home. i looked at his facebook and he is a good looking guy for the most part. then i was like.... well i usually know of the guys she talks to, who is this.

 

Its probably nothing. she has never cheated on me or with anyone else. she knows whats wrong and what isnt. well.. sorta. as long as there is no cheating or flirting on her part then she does what she wants which is fair. SHE LOVES ATTENTION. But i feel so betrayed honestly. My mind goes crazy like ohh so thats why shes been so happy lately. a new guy! my logical mind knows nothing is wrong but i get sick and feel horrible and i cringe.. all of a sudden my happiness with her fades and it get extremely mad, angry, and yeah. I just feel horrible. i hate it.

 

If we are to ever end it will be because of my jealousy. we have no issues other than that really unless she is on her period. ( i try my best to be there and understand ) but i havent seemed to get this taken care of..

 

how do i stop this. she reassures me sometimes and i feel good for a couple weeks then it comes back. i tried counseling, Therapy, talking to other girls. i cant do it..

 

when i talk to other girls i feel guilty... i feel like i shouldnt be doing it because i wouldnt want her talking to other guys that find her attractive and want her.

[DavidNarn]

cant help**** i mean..

[skywriter]

It sounds like maybe, you are insecure, hence the jealousy, because you realise, she doesn't share your values, when trying to be in a relationship.

 

Your opening sentence spoke of a relationship, but, then as your story progressed I got a picture of a person who isn't sure if she's as into him as he is her.

 

Just take your time and if your gut is telling you something, if you take the time, to be mindful, trust your gut, you'll know if it's right or not.

 

Most of all, you need to be able to trust. This includes, what you believe to be attractive people or whomever. Without that, you'll sabotage your relationship anyway.

[skumpf]

Don't think it is your jealousy. That can also be her excuse. More than likely it is her creating that by her behavior take it from me 14 yrs of marriage and I know of cheating twice. I thought other times things were happening but had no proof and she talked it don't made excuses cried and couldn't believe I would think that. Well, looking back I was love blind and should have been out of here in the first month. Now three kids later and a legal battle.

Edited June 8, 2012 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Removed wife's name from post