Author dsw31 Posted May 27, 2012 Author Posted May 27, 2012 Lol! That nc didn't last long! I texted him "That just means that you are running from your problems & feel like no one can help you.You feel like no one likes you.I said I bet I wasn't in that car.I bet you don't even think of me" He said "I do.What does your dream mean?" I just replied "Stop lying.My dream means that I feel like my world is collapsing & you are the only one who could save me" He said "why do you feel like someone else is responsible for you" I knew it was a mistake texting him! I just need to chop off my fingers already!
Hereiam007 Posted May 27, 2012 Posted May 27, 2012 That actually is An honest question. "Say, I just want everybody to be responsible for me as I am for them. We can't do this all alone. But in the end it will be my choice."
Hereiam007 Posted May 27, 2012 Posted May 27, 2012 I can help u. I had similiar characteristcs as your boyfriend one time. U know self- centered and never listen
Author dsw31 Posted May 27, 2012 Author Posted May 27, 2012 Here's the rest of our convo I said "You're not responsible for me.You just devastated me.I still can't believe this sh+t" He said "How?" I said "I know having BPD makes you have memory loss but come on now..." He said "Because I broke up with you?That's how I devastated you?" I said "If I had to explain all the things that devastated me I could write a book" He said "More like you can't explain.You're addicted to me like a drug" I said "Um..no.I just really f*cken loved you.If you really want to know what you did I can write the book for you.I get it though-I've broken up with people before & never gave it a second thought.I'm glad you are doing ok without me" He said "See that's a perfect example.You are depressing me & agitating me.It makes me want to be really mean to you.I'm fantasizing about punching you in the face"
RiRi Posted May 27, 2012 Posted May 27, 2012 I know Art Critic but it's the hardest thing I've ever had to do Hey, i think you did really well to turn down his offer to go and watch something with him. If you really like him and if you do want him back, stay away but live your life to the full! If he makes contact with you, say you are really busy at the moment. Then drop him a text in a few weeks to meet for coffee and a chat, then take it from there. You need to be really selfish and forget about him for a while, just go out with your friends and live every day like it is your last. Have fun and stop pining for him and certainly stop checking if he's in or out. He's ruling your life! Do the opposite of everything that comes naturally to you. You may find that in time, you enjoy your life without him and he may not be the one for you! If he is, you will get there. But dont force or rush anything. My website may help you www.notbreaking.com Best wishes and good luck and remember - get out there and live your life for you! There was life before him and there will definately be life after him!
Exit Posted May 27, 2012 Posted May 27, 2012 Wait... why are we on page 4 of a thread where you asked people to talk some sense into you, and you're giving us details about the numerous texts you decided to share with this guy tonight? Your NC skills need some major work... 2
Hereiam007 Posted May 27, 2012 Posted May 27, 2012 Ok. No more of the blaming him for the break up. You have some responsibility in it as well. you came on real strong in your text...thank u for sharing. ate t him and can u apologize. He doesnt want to hear about this now.
Author dsw31 Posted May 27, 2012 Author Posted May 27, 2012 I was so upset last night.Had to reply to that "fantasizing about punching me in the face" comment. THESE HAVE TO BE MY LAST WORDS WITH HIM!! I wrote "Yup..3:30 am & I'm still pissed.This will be the very last time I ever contact you.I was just just trying to express my hurt & you wanna "punch me in the face?" I'm at peace knowing that you will always be a sick,twisted,miserable person.It kind of makes me feel good knowing that you can never make anyone happy...not even yourself" I think I'm going to be needing you guys more than ever! I really CAN'T talk to him anymore.Way too painful!
Author dsw31 Posted May 27, 2012 Author Posted May 27, 2012 Hey, i think you did really well to turn down his offer to go and watch something with him. If you really like him and if you do want him back, stay away but live your life to the full! If he makes contact with you, say you are really busy at the moment. Then drop him a text in a few weeks to meet for coffee and a chat, then take it from there. You need to be really selfish and forget about him for a while, just go out with your friends and live every day like it is your last. Have fun and stop pining for him and certainly stop checking if he's in or out. He's ruling your life! Do the opposite of everything that comes naturally to you. You may find that in time, you enjoy your life without him and he may not be the one for you! If he is, you will get there. But dont force or rush anything. My website may help you www.notbreaking.com Best wishes and good luck and remember - get out there and live your life for you! There was life before him and there will definately be life after him! Thanks for your kind words RiRi! I read your other post about "question for the dumpers & dumpees" & I gotta say...you nailed it! When you said that the dumper has already made their decision & grieved before D-day even came. Then the part about them maybe having second thoughts after some time has passed.I think that's what keeps me stuck.This is our 3rd time breaking up & throughout our other breakups,my ex acted a little unsure about his decision.It made me believe that he might still want to be with me.I guess he has completely made up his mind now. I can totally relate to being the dumper as well.When I brokeup with one of my old ex's,I felt like I had been let out of prison. I will check out your book because I really need to learn how to be happy without him.Thanks again for posting
Hereiam007 Posted May 27, 2012 Posted May 27, 2012 That is painful for what he said. Sorry he said. He needs more manners and better way to express himself. The reality is that u love him, and these will be the steps to work it out. He never hit u so that is a good sign. Can u say that it was nice for him to say those things?
Art_Critic Posted May 27, 2012 Posted May 27, 2012 I think I'm going to be needing you guys more than ever! What is it that we can do for you ?.. you seem hell bent on continuing to contact him 1
Author dsw31 Posted May 27, 2012 Author Posted May 27, 2012 What is it that we can do for you ?.. you seem hell bent on continuing to contact him I know I'm stubborn but I honestly don't want to keep hurting myself.I might just need some reassurance every once in a while that my ex is a douche & I will gain nothing out of contacting him. He did reply this morning He said- "I'm going to kick your ass next time I see you" That was a few hours ago He just sent me a picture of him standing in the mirror naked, with his penis tucked into his legs & the caption said "eat my p*ssy" He is taunting me but I'm going to be strong this time. Plus...I just met a new guy that I just might be interested in. He's attractive,likes the same music as me (which is rare) likes UFC & works at a law firm. This may be just what I need to get over the ex. Well see...I'll keep you guys posted. Thanks for putting up with my shenanigans!
Art_Critic Posted May 27, 2012 Posted May 27, 2012 Thanks for putting up with my shenanigans! Good luck.. I'm done posting in your thread.. You seem be be just craving some attention instead of actual advice.. and that is okay but I would rather spend my free time helping someone rather than spending it on someone who only wants to hear us post. 1
Author dsw31 Posted May 27, 2012 Author Posted May 27, 2012 Good luck.. I'm done posting in your thread.. You seem be be just craving some attention instead of actual advice.. and that is okay but I would rather spend my free time helping someone rather than spending it on someone who only wants to hear us post. I'm sorry you feel that way. I don't really understand how I could be craving attention from people who don't even know me.I assure you that's not the case.I post here because it's been very therapuetic typing everything out & hearing other people's views.I do listen to everyone's advice & I'm trying my best to take everything into consideration.I just lack self control when it comes to my ex because I love him more than I have ever loved anyone.It's not easy. He just sent me another picture.He is posing with a gun that I guess he just bought.The caption said "come get some" I'm still ignoring & I will try my best to keep it that way. To anyone who's still listening-thank you & I welcome any input ,advice, and even criticism.
ToyWithMe812 Posted May 27, 2012 Posted May 27, 2012 Whoa, he is doing some Buffalo Bill type s**t and you still are relentless with the contact? No offense, but this cat sounds mentally deranged. You either have to put the time in and know how to handle someone like that, or really, let it go. You even state that he is done with you, and you know it, yet he pulls a Buffalo Bill, then "come get some." Please, you guys had your last little psychotic flirt, now it's time to instill the willpower. Don't say you do not have any, we all do. Listen, it does sound that this is something you should do for your own safety. You might think you know him to a T, then one day, el snappo - as if Buffalo Bill were not a good enough clue. You know he's done with you, you know you should be done with him. Regain your footing and when you feel that you are ready, go out with the lawyer. You need not share this with BB, I see no good coming of that.
Author dsw31 Posted May 27, 2012 Author Posted May 27, 2012 Whoa, he is doing some Buffalo Bill type s**t and you still are relentless with the contact? No offense, but this cat sounds mentally deranged. You either have to put the time in and know how to handle someone like that, or really, let it go. You even state that he is done with you, and you know it, yet he pulls a Buffalo Bill, then "come get some." Please, you guys had your last little psychotic flirt, now it's time to instill the willpower. Don't say you do not have any, we all do. Listen, it does sound that this is something you should do for your own safety. You might think you know him to a T, then one day, el snappo - as if Buffalo Bill were not a good enough clue. You know he's done with you, you know you should be done with him. Regain your footing and when you feel that you are ready, go out with the lawyer. You need not share this with BB, I see no good coming of that. I'm sorry ToyWithMe. I don't mean to sound naieve but, what do you mean by "Buffalo Bill type sh*t?" The gun thing? I'm sure he wasn't threatening me with that.He is just craving some attention from me because, he doesn't think I'm serious about being angry at him for his comment last night. I think it was just an effort to get me to respond since I didn't respond to the naked picture earlier. I do take what you're saying seriously though...many ex's have killed before so I wouldn't put it past anyone but, I sure that's the case here at all.I still will not be in contact but I don't want anyone to think he will harm me.He has no reason to.Thanks for your input!
ToyWithMe812 Posted May 27, 2012 Posted May 27, 2012 I'm sorry ToyWithMe. I don't mean to sound naieve but, what do you mean by "Buffalo Bill type sh*t?" The gun thing? I'm sure he wasn't threatening me with that.He is just craving some attention from me because, he doesn't think I'm serious about being angry at him for his comment last night. I think it was just an effort to get me to respond since I didn't respond to the naked picture earlier. I do take what you're saying seriously though...many ex's have killed before so I wouldn't put it past anyone but, I sure that's the case here at all.I still will not be in contact but I don't want anyone to think he will harm me.He has no reason to.Thanks for your input! Wait a minute, you have seen Silence of The Lambs before, yea? Dude, I am talking about him tucking his trouser trout and sending you a picture, that bit of inspired insanity. There is no argument this cat has some serious mental s**t going on, yea? Hypothetically, if one is going to be in a relationship with such a person, it is damned near having a special needs child, not to mention the potential safety risk. Can you just ask yourself, do I still miss him so much, even after he pulled some SOTL on you? Beyond that, he is not exactly an infant and you are letting him get the better of you. If not for your own safety, for your own mental health. There may have been an incomparable passion there, I have felt that and lost it myself. But, in this situation, you already admit you know he's over you. Do not give him any more ammo and instead, do something constructive you enjoy to kill some time, and in the meanwhile, do not f'n contact him - and yes, it is that simple now. Let it go. Regain yourself and go find that lawyer when you are ready. It's your time to rock and roll without him.
BewitchedandBothered Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 First, he fantasizes about punching you in the face, says he wants to kisk your ass when he sees you, poses like the psycho from Silence of the Lambs and is now posing with a gun? Am I reading this right? Sounds extremely unbalanced and you initiated the texting. This has got to stop if you want some normalcy in your life. You are toyng with each other and it is so unnecessary. Why do you want attention from him? Was it the sex? Some people confuse sex and love and miss the intimacy. Again, this guy sounds unbalanced and.....strange.
Dark Phoenix Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 He's having fun with her... there's no harm She knows it too... You people take things WAY TOO seriously
ToyWithMe812 Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 He's having fun with her... there's no harm She knows it too... You people take things WAY TOO seriously Yes, it must be. Fun. Yes, that, or he's having fun until he can begin his Ed Gein saga. Yes, maybe that is the sort of lunacy she is ok with. 1
BewitchedandBothered Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 He's having fun with her... there's no harm She knows it too... You people take things WAY TOO seriously There is fun and there is off behavior. There is also no reason for her to be contacting this guy if she wants to heal.
Dark Phoenix Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 She's still in love with him How about showing some empathy and not telling her what she should and shouldnt be doing. I quit trying, she has more knowledge then me about the situation, shes just emotionally drained trying to get her bearings
ToyWithMe812 Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 She's still in love with him How about showing some empathy and not telling her what she should and shouldnt be doing. I quit trying, she has more knowledge then me about the situation, shes just emotionally drained trying to get her bearings Hell, I empathize, but she isn't asking for empathy. She is asking for someone to talk some sense into her. She is doing herself no good by prolonging contact. I still love my ex, but I know that she totally completely cut me out of her life and wants nothing more to do with me. That is something I have to live with for the rest of my life. She is relaying this Buffalo Bill behavior, sorry, I can think of no better advisement for her than to cut all contact with him, if for nothing else, so she can heal.
BewitchedandBothered Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 I am gracefully bowing out of this dance. It's making me dizzy.
Author dsw31 Posted May 28, 2012 Author Posted May 28, 2012 He is demented in his sense of humor but, so am I. I think he's being cute & he's just doing it because he doesn't want me to drop off the face of the earth.He will not physically harm me..that's something I am 100% sure of.He is also not stupid enough to send evidence to my phone before commuting a crime.I do still love him but I know keeping in contact with him is hurting me so I am trying my best to not ever talk to him again. He just texted me "Didn't you like my pictures?" He is afraid of abadonment.
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