believe_believe Posted May 26, 2012 Posted May 26, 2012 I will try and keep it short.... I am 24 year old (m), and have been with my gf of the same age for 3 years. We met at university and were friends for 3 years before we started dating. Our relationship was great. We had a few up and downs but nothing unusual, we have always been able to talk and communicate through things, which made us understand each other through stressful times. Recently I moved away for a new job...(about 2 hours away by car), I also had a work trip I had to go to for 3 and half weeks. While I was out there she began telling me that she wanted a break and was not happy for a year! This shocked me to the core! It came out of nowhere and I was fighting, and backed into the corner. Yes there was crying, begging and pleading......we just stopped talking until I was back. I began pressuring her for a an answer if she knew she wanted to end it as I felt she was leaving me in limbo land. This had gone on for a week until I found this forum! She has word for word got G.I.G.S! Before I was so cut up not knowing why and her not giving me a reason, or being able to make her ind up. But this is now the answer I needed, even though she doesn't understand what's going on herself. She has been unsure, going out, spending the last month not at home but with a friend, not even talking to her parents. She said she wants to be selfish as she has never been and doesn't want to rely on anybody any more. I was hurt as over the past year I have taken steps for this relationship, introducing her to my family, being invited to my family functions with myself and my family making effort. Although over the past year I was very stressed with final examinations for university (which she had already done as she is a year older). I was living on my own with no family or friend support, and treated as a gf, friend and family remember. I was very stressed and couldn't make much time for her. This is my mistake but I always acknologed this and spoke to her. She said she understood and I told her i know it wasn't good enough but it was important for me to pass so we can both move forward. I would say this is only temporary and once I have this out the way then I will be there... Then as soon as I passed and finished and was ready...she has decided she wants to end things. Giving me mixes messages, flipping from saying she want's tp, but then saying she doesn't know and feels pressured to make a choice. I have to go back to her city for a week for work (which we planned to spend together only 5 weeks ago), we have both been off for the week I have been back from holiday and she refused to see me. But we have agreed to meet on Moonday (if she still sticks to the plan). I agree that we do love each other, but I need to know how to proceed and how to end it and does it sound like that is what she really wants? I am even wondering whether i hould pring the G.I.GS explanantion out and show her to give her some reasoning for her thoughts. I really know she is the one for me and me for her, but we do need this time for ourselevs to reonnect with friends and have our own lives. The past 3 years we only wanted/had each other...and now that has grown t resentment. I know that we can work on all this and work on ourseleves... I want to proceed in a way where if it does end for good I have done it the right way. But I do want this back at some point and need to act keeping that in mind.... I have not proof read....but will respond and add anything to clarify... Thank you guys so much! don't feel as alone! Sorry for spelling mistakes... X
gibson Posted May 26, 2012 Posted May 26, 2012 Yes it sounds like a classic case of G.I.G.S. to me. I would read through all the posts in the main G.I.G.S. thread, read the two threads in my signature below and the following one too: Dumped by someone with G.I.G.S.? All your Questions are Answered within this thread!
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