Mindfr3ak Posted May 26, 2012 Posted May 26, 2012 (edited) Uhm,sorry about the title,I couldnt think of a better name for this one.So,after about 4 months I think that I've finally got over my ex.I dont yet know if this is really the case,but im waaay better now.I've travelled to Rome for a few days since its fairly close to me,worked on myself,changed most of my clothes and got a new fresh image and still it didnt help me to completely get her off my mind.The only time I really felt depressed in about a month is 3 days ago,when we had our anniversary,but apart from that I definitely dont feel like I used to feel when i started the whole NC thing.As I already said,I dont know if Im over her completely yet,but I guess you are the only ones that can tell me that.She isnt the first thing I think of in the morning but still when I dont have anyone to talk to,I think of her,but thats probably just because I used to speak with her 24/7.About an hour ago,my friend told me that she contacted him and asked him if Im alright and if I have a new gf yet,that she misses me and regrets all she has done to me,and she asked him if I would be happy to be with her once again.I dont really know why but now that she has finally noticed her mistakes and wants me back,I feel like its too late.I dont believe that she wont hurt me and leave me again,and I couldnt care less if she finds a new bf.So,I dont know if I've finally got over her or is it just a stage of getting over her,but I feel fresh and better now,and I finally understand that NC is not a trick for getting back with that person,but to allow yourself to heal and move on.And yes,one more thing,is it normal that I now see her as a different person?Every time I think of her and about the happy moments we've been through,I say to myself "I love her but she isnt the same person anymore,those moments wont happen again",and I feel strange but better,so is that normal? Edited May 26, 2012 by Mindfr3ak
Savage4 Posted May 26, 2012 Posted May 26, 2012 Glad to hear you have worked on yourself and are doing better. I think part of the reason breakups hurt so much is to force people to grow and improve themselves in the process. We can't tell you if you are over her or not. You are the only one that will truly know that. The fact that you feel the way you do is a good sign though. As far as NC, it primarily allows you to heal and move on but it is also happens to give most people the best chance of getting their ex back. It's the best of both worlds. It is normal to see your ex in a different light after you move on and lose feelings for them. This is the point where many people whose hearts were crushed realize that they dodged a bullet and are actually thankful their ex broke up with them. In your situation: 1. You have worked on yourself and feel like a better person now 2. You feel like she is too late; you are moving on 3. She has lost your trust. You feel she may hurt you again 4. You don't care if she finds a new boyfriend 5. You feel 'fresh' and 'better now' 6. You see her in a different light; perhaps from an outside perspective for the first time. The fog has cleared and you see her the way she truly is 7. You don't think things could ever be the same again if you got back together With all that ^^^ in mind why would you ever get back together with her? Keep doing what you're doing! 1
Author Mindfr3ak Posted May 26, 2012 Author Posted May 26, 2012 In your situation: 1. You have worked on yourself and feel like a better person now 2. You feel like she is too late; you are moving on 3. She has lost your trust. You feel she may hurt you again 4. You don't care if she finds a new boyfriend 5. You feel 'fresh' and 'better now' 6. You see her in a different light; perhaps from an outside perspective for the first time. The fog has cleared and you see her the way she truly is 7. You don't think things could ever be the same again if you got back together With all that ^^^ in mind why would you ever get back together with her? Keep doing what you're doing! Yes,you are totally right about that.There is simply no way to get back with her,I just lost all my trust for her,and love is sometimes not enough,and even though all my dreams of future included her,giving her another chance would be like giving her another bullet since the first one missed me.
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