udolipixie Posted May 26, 2012 Posted May 26, 2012 Seems like you saw as a date she saw as hanging out. Though the 'on a date' and 'intend on dating' does suggest to me that it wasn't a date rather you wanted to date her. THough interesting that to many stating a person is your friend not your date is putting someone down and plain rude.
mortensorchid Posted May 26, 2012 Posted May 26, 2012 Well it depends, have you ever met any of these other people in the room before? If you bring someone to a party, that is pretty much the public announcement that you are officially with this person. If you bring them to a public place (ex. a bar) and you end up seeing a lot of the other person's friends and acquaintances, that's not so public. Once years ago I had an OLD (a second one) with this guy, he suggested that I choose the event. So I brought him to a small bar where they were having live music for their Internet talk show. A few people approached him and asked if this was a date, he said "sort of" (nice middle of the road approach). No one asked me what it was about. Unfortunately for me he threw a huge temper tantrum about something a week or two later, then he sent an email asking if we could be friends. I never responded to it.
thatone Posted May 26, 2012 Posted May 26, 2012 I would not have made that intrusive assumption. I would have said, "Sorry to interrupt, but I used to live in ________ and loved it/hated it." If they had both been wearing wedding rings would you have said, "I know you are both married and having an affair, but I couldn't help but overhear..." Their relationship or lack of one was irrelevant and caused embarrassment. Well that wasnt all i heard, it was the typical get to know you first date type convo. Only after he blew it with the religious thing did i join in.
Author irc333 Posted May 26, 2012 Author Posted May 26, 2012 Well that wasnt all i heard, it was the typical get to know you first date type convo. Only after he blew it with the religious thing did i join in. How'd he "blow it"? You said he was offended by her religious joke, of course, you only ASSUMED he was offended, so you have no real way of knowing he was.
thatone Posted May 26, 2012 Posted May 26, 2012 i was sitting right next to them, i could hear it all. she said something to the effect of "would you get offended if i told a religious joke?" as a test, and he responded with "i don't know, i just don't like it when people make fun of god" and 10 minutes later she went to the bathroom and then ducked out on him. it was fairly obvious.
Author irc333 Posted May 26, 2012 Author Posted May 26, 2012 i was sitting right next to them, i could hear it all. she said something to the effect of "would you get offended if i told a religious joke?" as a test, and he responded with "i don't know, i just don't like it when people make fun of god" and 10 minutes later she went to the bathroom and then ducked out on him. it was fairly obvious. Sounds like she's the loser, not him. For ducking out on him like that. Pretty f-'ing rude, obviously.
Emilia Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 Sounds like she's the loser, not him. For ducking out on him like that. Pretty f-'ing rude, obviously. True but at the same time I couldn't get away fast enough from a guy who got lame over some religious joke.
thatone Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 True but at the same time I couldn't get away fast enough from a guy who got lame over some religious joke. yeah and this particular guy shows up there all the time, the most popular nights at this particular neighborhood bar are tuesdays and wednesdays. i see him in there alone all the time on those days, and from the looks of his facebook he travels alone quite a bit too. if i had to guess, he thinks he wants the 'city' lifestyle of meeting random women and hitting the bars but isn't willing to let go of his small town religious upbringing to do it. i think she zero'd in on that pretty quick and ran.
Author irc333 Posted May 28, 2012 Author Posted May 28, 2012 Though, how come he's not meeting women at church? Well, I can guess why....women in churches are married, at least in the smaller communities...however, the irony of all this...is single people seem to frequent bars/clubs. You hardly ever see any SINGLE people in general in a church. Seems when people get married and have kids, they only attend church for the kids. yeah and this particular guy shows up there all the time, the most popular nights at this particular neighborhood bar are tuesdays and wednesdays. i see him in there alone all the time on those days, and from the looks of his facebook he travels alone quite a bit too. if i had to guess, he thinks he wants the 'city' lifestyle of meeting random women and hitting the bars but isn't willing to let go of his small town religious upbringing to do it. i think she zero'd in on that pretty quick and ran.
thatone Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 yeah, that's true. i feel sorry for those people in a way, their religious upbringing has caused them a lot of baggage in their adult years. but there's a simple solution, turn loose of the church and all of its false morality. they have a choice to make like anyone else, they can't choose to have a fantasy life that doesn't exist.
gibson Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 Though, how come he's not meeting women at church? Well, I can guess why....women in churches are married, at least in the smaller communities... WRONG! God gave him a brain and deductive reasoning skills which he chooses not to use. If he doesn't go to church, goes to a small church (not very many single people) or goes to a church that doesn't have a singles program... He does get the fact that God wants us to "help ourselves" and therefore.. His own worst enemy. however, the irony of all this...is single people seem to frequent bars/clubs. You hardly ever see any SINGLE people in general in a church. Seems when people get married and have kids, they only attend church for the kids. WRONG! I just went to a singles event at my Church and their were 1,200+ single people that attended. It was 65% women to men and the "talent" (gorgeous women on the inside and out) and amount of "talent" was better than any bar or club than I have ever been too. I have also participated in Charity Events, Volunteering Opportunities, Community Service Projects, Fundraisers, Black Tie Events, Professional Organizations, etc. which also attracted a lot of "talent" that also blew away any bar or club that I have been too. Why? These are generally going to attract higher quality individuals. They are donating their time, energy and effort to worthy causes or self-improvement. So a large majority of the individuals that attend these things are more giving, understanding, compassionate, charitable, selfless, caring, etc. Not only are the things I listed above a lot fun and rewarding. You also get to make a difference in your community and someones life. Not to mention, expand your horizons, make new friends and acquaintances and surround yourself with people that generally have the qualities you would look for / desire in a partner. i feel sorry for those people in a way, their religious upbringing has caused them a lot of baggage in their adult years. Hahahahahaha! Their sword cuts both ways. I have come across just as many (if not more) people with baggage who didn't attend church. turn loose of the church and all of its false morality. What false morality is it that you are speaking of? Treat others the way you want to be treated? Don't lie, steal and cheat? Since when did morals, values, character, integrity, honor, honesty, etc. become a bad thing? If you ask me, the world needs more of it! they have a choice to make like anyone else, they can't choose to have a fantasy life that doesn't exist. What fantasy life are you referring too? To meet someone he values, respects, admires, cherishes, honors, adores and loves? Throughout our 20s my friends and I were just "having fun", focusing on our careers, experiencing the world, partying, dating around, etc. so we spent plenty of time in bars and clubs with people who were also in that "phase" of their life. Having said all of that... I did not / have not met too many women or men who were into "the scene" that were actively pursuing or wanting to meet "the one". Not to mention, there wasn't many were what I would consider "marriage material" (neither were my friends and I back in the day). This guys problem is this... He is "fishing" in the wrong pond. Any idiot with half a brain knows that bars in clubs are generally full of people who are having / looking for a good time and use alcohol to facilitate this process. Why this comes as any surprise or the fact he would be offended by it, is beyond me. Pond A Church (Ones that are conducive to where he is in his life), Charity Events, Volunteering Opportunities, Community Service Projects, Fundraisers, Black Tie Events, Professional Organizations, etc. Pond B Bars and clubs Which pond do you think is going attract / have more of the "fish" he is looking for?
Author irc333 Posted May 28, 2012 Author Posted May 28, 2012 Depends on the church, if he's in a LARGE city, usually they're more liikely to have singles ministries, while small towns aren't much geared toward the singles. Though, if he DOES have singles group at his churches, but still attends bars....well....yeah, I can see how it's on him and he should be attending functions at the church, not at a bar for pete's sakes. lol Other than charitable organizations or black tie events, there's also special interests groups, like "Movie Night" groups, or perhaps a Hiking/Kayaking group. He should try Meetup.com, there's TONS of opportunities there. Good quality people, too. I have noticed that some of the singles church functions are now utilizing Meetup. WRONG! God gave him a brain and deductive reasoning skills which he chooses not to use. If he doesn't go to church, goes to a small church (not very many single people) or goes to a church that doesn't have a singles program... He does get the fact that God wants us to "help ourselves" and therefore.. His own worst enemy. WRONG! I just went to a singles event at my Church and their were 1,200+ single people that attended. It was 65% women to men and the "talent" (gorgeous women on the inside and out) and amount of "talent" was better than any bar or club than I have ever been too. I have also participated in Charity Events, Volunteering Opportunities, Community Service Projects, Fundraisers, Black Tie Events, Professional Organizations, etc. which also attracted a lot of "talent" that also blew away any bar or club that I have been too. Why? These are generally going to attract higher quality individuals. They are donating their time, energy and effort to worthy causes or self-improvement. So a large majority of the individuals that attend these things are more giving, understanding, compassionate, charitable, selfless, caring, etc. Not only are the things I listed above a lot fun and rewarding. You also get to make a difference in your community and someones life. Not to mention, expand your horizons, make new friends and acquaintances and surround yourself with people that generally have the qualities you would look for / desire in a partner. Hahahahahaha! Their sword cuts both ways. I have come across just as many (if not more) people with baggage who didn't attend church. What false morality is it that you are speaking of? Treat others the way you want to be treated? Don't lie, steal and cheat? Since when did morals, values, character, integrity, honor, honesty, etc. become a bad thing? If you ask me, the world needs more of it! What fantasy life are you referring too? To meet someone he values, respects, admires, cherishes, honors, adores and loves? Throughout our 20s my friends and I were just "having fun", focusing on our careers, experiencing the world, partying, dating around, etc. so we spent plenty of time in bars and clubs with people who were also in that "phase" of their life. Having said all of that... I did not / have not met too many women or men who were into "the scene" that were actively pursuing or wanting to meet "the one". Not to mention, there wasn't many were what I would consider "marriage material" (neither were my friends and I back in the day). This guys problem is this... He is "fishing" in the wrong pond. Any idiot with half a brain knows that bars in clubs are generally full of people who are having / looking for a good time and use alcohol to facilitate this process. Why this comes as any surprise or the fact he would be offended by it, is beyond me. Pond A Church (Ones that are conducive to where he is in his life), Charity Events, Volunteering Opportunities, Community Service Projects, Fundraisers, Black Tie Events, Professional Organizations, etc. Pond B Bars and clubs Which pond do you think is going attract / have more of the "fish" he is looking for?
Imported Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 Though, how come he's not meeting women at church? Well, I can guess why....women in churches are married, at least in the smaller communities...however, the irony of all this...is single people seem to frequent bars/clubs. You hardly ever see any SINGLE people in general in a church. Seems when people get married and have kids, they only attend church for the kids. The biggest slut I know is very religous and goes to church regularly. I don't mean to say she is outragously slutty, but she gets around. If you're descrete and fairly nice, she's all about giving you a blowjob.
gibson Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 The biggest slut I know is very religous and goes to church regularly. I don't mean to say she is outragously slutty, but she gets around. If you're descrete and fairly nice, she's all about giving you a blowjob. First, we all have free will. Second, attending church doesn't make one religious. Third, there are idiots, aholes, hypocrites, freaks, weirdos, etc. in all walks of life, groups, organizations, companies, etc. and yes even within churches. Do you honestly believe her pastor or the Bible is instructing her to be "slutty"? She wants to sleep around and doesn't care what God, her church or anyone else thinks or says about it. She chooses to do this by her own free will and Religion plays no part in it.
Imported Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 First, we all have free will. Second, attending church doesn't make one religious. Third, there are idiots, aholes, hypocrites, freaks, weirdos, etc. in all walks of life, groups, organizations, companies, etc. and yes even within churches. Do you honestly believe her pastor or the Bible is instructing her to be "slutty"? She wants to sleep around and doesn't care what God, her church or anyone else thinks or says about it. She chooses to do this by her own free will and Religion plays no part in it. First of all, I only said she was a slut and a church goer. Reads the bible and so on. Second of all, what makes a person religious "by your difinition"? She calls herself a religious person, who are you to judge??? Third of all, there are self rightous people everywhere thinking they are the end all authority and here to lecture people as if they know better and their **** don't stink. Do you honestly believe I said anything about her pastor or the bible telling her to be slutty? I suggest you read again, because I said nothing like that. Most likely it was her strict upbringing by overbaring parents, denying any of her sexual urges that got her being slutty.
gibson Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 what makes a person religious "by your difinition"? She calls herself a religious person, who are you to judge??? When did I say SHE wasn't religious? Reread what I wrote... Second, attending church doesn't make one religious. I didn't even mention her and what I said, is true. You can be religious and not attend church. You can be religious and attend church. You can not be religious and attend church. I have read Einstein's theory of relativity and theory of special relativity. Even took courses on them. Doesn't mean that I understand, follow, get or can explain what I read, was told or taught. there are self rightous people everywhere thinking they are the end all authority Welcome to life. Do you honestly believe I said anything about her pastor or the bible telling her to be slutty? You are the one calling her slut and pointed out her religious affiliations, not me. I simply said that her religious affiliations had nothing to do with the fact that she wants to sleep around. Most likely it was her strict upbringing by overbaring parents, denying any of her sexual urges that got her being slutty. Maybe she loves sex, maybe she is doing what a lot of other men and women her age are doing... which is, having lots of sex with multiple partners. However, what is undeniable... She has say / control over what she does or doesn't do and regardless of her parents, church or what you or I think... she is CHOOSING to be slutty.
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