Gulf-Delta Posted May 24, 2012 Posted May 24, 2012 Ever date men without the intention of falling in love? Or is a woman falling in love with a dude they date an inevitability? Do they expect/want to fall in love when they date someone initially?
Alexanda Posted May 24, 2012 Posted May 24, 2012 I don't, but I want to fall in love. If falling in love happens then it happens. I have never been in love with a guy though. I haven't met the right guy yet.
sid3 Posted May 24, 2012 Posted May 24, 2012 That's likely to be a case by case question. Just as difficult to answer is why an extremely attractive lady doesn't date at all.
pteromom Posted May 24, 2012 Posted May 24, 2012 Sure. I've dated guys just for fun, KNOWING that I wouldn't fall for them. But - I've also fallen for guys I had no intention of falling for, so it is dangerous to date someone you don't want a LTR with.
Author Gulf-Delta Posted May 24, 2012 Author Posted May 24, 2012 (edited) I see. So women do casually just date a guy just to date them, eh? I just ask because, I'm in no position to fall in love with someone right now, but still like seeing woemn, enjoy their company....dating I guess. I just don't know what women usually expect or hope for in a new relationship... Edited May 24, 2012 by Gulf-Delta
Ruby Slippers Posted May 24, 2012 Posted May 24, 2012 I have dated casually a couple of times just for the fun, companionship, and sex - and I was completely honest with the guys all along. But it didn't take long for me to figure out that this doesn't work for me. One of you inevitably begins to bond and fall for the other. If the sex is really good and the guy is strong and masculine, I tend to start falling, even if he's not that great on paper. So I'm not going to get tangled up in these situations anymore. I don't like to be cavalier with people's feelings - even if all the facts are out on the table the whole time. It just doesn't feel right.
Author Gulf-Delta Posted May 24, 2012 Author Posted May 24, 2012 I have dated casually a couple of times just for the fun, companionship, and sex - and I was completely honest with the guys all along. But it didn't take long for me to figure out that this doesn't work for me. One of you inevitably begins to bond and fall for the other. If the sex is really good and the guy is strong and masculine, I tend to start falling, even if he's not that great on paper. So I'm not going to get tangled up in these situations anymore. I don't like to be cavalier with people's feelings - even if all the facts are out on the table the whole time. It just doesn't feel right. I see....so it's a case by case basis then? For some, it's inevitable, for some there's just casual fun/sex/companionship? I don't want a woman to fall in love with me right now
udolipixie Posted May 24, 2012 Posted May 24, 2012 Some do and I'm one as I multi- date guys to entertain and amuse myself.
Ruby Slippers Posted May 24, 2012 Posted May 24, 2012 I see....so it's a case by case basis then? For some, it's inevitable, for some there's just casual fun/sex/companionship? I don't want a woman to fall in love with me right now I think there are plenty of women out there who just want a FWB or even just a f*ck buddy. But you can't count on these situations lasting too long or being totally without drama or hurt feelings. If you want a situation like this, I say just be honest and prepare yourself for some fallout - but that's true with all relationships. I think it helps to seek out someone who's not really your type, or suitable for long-term partnership. That can help mitigate that desire to bond for the long haul.
pteromom Posted May 25, 2012 Posted May 25, 2012 I see. So women do casually just date a guy just to date them, eh? I just ask because, I'm in no position to fall in love with someone right now, but still like seeing woemn, enjoy their company....dating I guess. I just don't know what women usually expect or hope for in a new relationship... Depends on the woman. Best bet is to just be upfront and open about what you want, and try to find someone who wants the same.
Author Gulf-Delta Posted May 25, 2012 Author Posted May 25, 2012 I think there are plenty of women out there who just want a FWB or even just a f*ck buddy. But you can't count on these situations lasting too long or being totally without drama or hurt feelings. If you want a situation like this, I say just be honest and prepare yourself for some fallout - but that's true with all relationships. I think it helps to seek out someone who's not really your type, or suitable for long-term partnership. That can help mitigate that desire to bond for the long haul. I see. I've some female friends about it as well and some of them seem to say the same. Just seems like women are moreso intent on emotion connection, so once they fall in love easily/quickly if they find a guy they like. No girls I've ever met have really been described as casual daters. Seems like most women are intent on dating guys with the intention of trying/wanting to fall in love. But I guess it stands that it just varies depending on the persons involved all around.
DuchessKaye Posted May 25, 2012 Posted May 25, 2012 Ever date men without the intention of falling in love? I usually date with no intention of falling in love. I've dated guys only to kill time. And I used to be the kind of person who lives in the moment. Whatever happens, happens. If he turns out to be the guy that sparks out my interest, great! If not, we can always be friends. But guess what? When I started dating my recent ex, I thought I would never ever fall in love with him. And I really had no plans to fall in love with anyone... But...amazing things do happen... he made me fall in love...
Ruby Slippers Posted May 28, 2012 Posted May 28, 2012 Just seems like women are moreso intent on emotion connection, so once they fall in love easily/quickly if they find a guy they like. No girls I've ever met have really been described as casual daters. Seems like most women are intent on dating guys with the intention of trying/wanting to fall in love. When you start having sex with / mating with someone, it sets off a chain of chemical reactions in the brain, which creates a natural bond. The healthiest offspring are supported by a bond that endures through pregnancy and early toddlerhood, at least. If a woman is mating with a man, it is very much in her best interest and that of the couple's genetic code to let this bond develop. Contraception blocks the offspring, but not the bonding process. You can fight it and try to outsmart nature - but even for people with a solid understanding of what's going on, this is not easy to do.
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