Recognize and replace fearful thoughts

[paperboy48]

I saw this on a website earlier today..

 

Recognize and replace fearful thoughts.

When you’re holding onto a relationship, it’s usually more about attachment than love. Love wants for the other person’s happiness. Fear wants to hold onto whatever appears to make you happy so you don’t have to feel the alternative.

 

You might not recognize these types of fearful thoughts because they become habitual. Some examples include: I’ll never feel loved again. I’ll always feel lonely. I am completely powerless. Replace those thoughts with: All pain passes eventually. It will be easier if I help them pass by being mindful. I can’t always control what happens to me, but I can control how I respond to it

 

 

 

Does anyone actually agree with this?

 

Love wants for the other person's happiness - If you are in love with someone and they are no longer in love with you, them being happy does not make you continue to love them.

[skywriter]

Thank you for posting that paperboy.

 

It gives me comfort in reading those words and I will reread them often.

 

Best wishes to you and yes I do agree with love wanting their loved ones to be happy. I've loved and lived this.

 

I believe we do fear letting go because of our own individual feelings, such as, the habit of loving this particular person, for so long and hoping, if we love them enough, that they will in turn love us back.

 

And finally the three sentences are simple genius at is best, and I can bear witness to it's truth.

 

As for loving someone and them not loving me back. I can only say this now, it's his loss. He chose after three children, purchasing a home, getting in debt, to realise he didn't love me.

 

It took yrs to come to terms with this and now I can say honestly. I wish him no ill. I wish him love and happiness. As an adult woman, how can I carry all this anger and bitterness? It's a burden I don't want for myself.

 

I want to be happy therefore I choose to be.

Edited May 24, 2012 by skywriter

[paperboy48]

Thank you for posting that paperboy.

 

It gives me comfort in reading those words and I will reread them often.

 

Best wishes to you and yes I do agree with love wanting their loved ones to be happy. I've loved and lived this.

 

I believe we do fear letting go because of our own individual feelings, such as, the habit of loving this particular person, for so long and hoping, if we love them enough, that they will in turn love us back.

 

And finally the three sentences are simple genius at is best, and I can bear witness to it's truth.

 

As for loving someone and them not loving me back. I can only say this now, it's his loss. He chose after three children, purchasing a home, getting in debt, to realise he didn't love me.

 

It took yrs to come to terms with this and now I can say honestly. I wish him no ill. I wish him love and happiness. As an adult woman, how can I carry all this anger and bitterness? It's a burden I don't want for myself.

 

I want to be happy therefore I choose to be.

 

Good for you - someday I may be there. For now, I am nowhere near!

[BewitchedandBothered]

You must also love yourself---hence a very good reason to let go of someone who doesn't share your feelings. And if you truly love someone, let them go, if that's what they want. We mourn their loss but we get over it in time. If you keep trying to hold onto someone who doesn't want to stay, it's not about love, it's about being selfish and not wanting to be alone. But.....love yourself first!!!!

[CopingGal]

But the person has to be an adult and admit they do not want to stay. They can't lie and tell you they are happy with you and then make up lies not to see you and cheat on your behind your back. In order to be mature and let someone go, they have to be honest with you and tell you they no longer want to be in the relationship with you.

[nanbullen]

It makes sense except what does it mean/how do you be 'mindful'?