zanzi Posted May 24, 2012 Posted May 24, 2012 This guy I have known for five weeks, we hooked up and not long after ( this is where the alarm bells went off in my brain- such a short time to confess love) he was telling me he was falling in love with me. Now he's my boyfriend. We just went away together. But not long afetr we got together I honestly was having thoughts like "do I really want this?" and " do I really love this guy, do I want to be with him?" And every time I asked myself the answers to those questions, I came back with confused incertain feelings. My desire to be with him is sometimes shaky at best. He is a wonderful guy, but for some reason a part of me is spooked and wants to get away from a relationship taht pretty much jumped out of nowhere. I know that sounds silly but it feels very sudden, and he seems so sure. I have had recurrant thoughts about breaking up with him, when I am with him though I feel more like I love him. But when I'm not with him, I start feeling these feelings more strongly. I am afraid of hurting him as I am not heartless and do actually care about his feelings. I am also aware that If I dont know my own feelings I am being dishonest essentially with myself and him. What is your opinion?
udolipixie Posted May 24, 2012 Posted May 24, 2012 My opinion is that one doesn't necessarily have to be in love with someone to be their boyfriend/girlfriend. If you like the idea of being his girlfriend (sex & companionship) to me it's irrevelant if you love him. If you dislike the idea of being his girlfriend then bail out. Do your questions of "do I really want this?" & " do I really love this guy, do I want to be with him?" stem from taking the boyfriend and girlfriend relationship to be a dynamic leading to marriage or long-term serious committment? If so it's probably best suited to bail if you have doubts or consider love to be important for such a case. As for him telling you that he's falling in love with you depending on how long/well he knows you it's may be best suited to disregard any significance to it.
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