Come on Guys - Is it really that bad out there?

May 23, 2012

I mean a woman appreciates those things in a guy.

Any woman that is worth a crap that you date, enter into a relationship with or marry will not just "appreciate" those things in a guy. They WANT, NEED, SEEK, DESIRE, LONG FOR, etc. those things will all their heart, mind, body and soul.

It's just that she has multiple guys chasing after her, so even if you have some of those things that match with her, you're competing with another guy who has matching stuff too or is better looking, etc.

If you "ARE" what I tell you to become you will never think, worry about, consider or be threatened by another guy ever again.

And she will choose.

No she won't... there isn't a choice to make as far as she is concerned.

Edited May 23, 2012 by gibson

May 23, 2012

Its not as bad as dudes make it out to be on here OP.

I feel im an average dude, but any time I have droughts its due to my own inaction. And even then sometimes I stumble upon a good time if I happen to meet a girl whos a bit assertive.

May 23, 2012

Any woman that is worth a crap that you date, enter into a relationship with or marry will not just "appreciate" those things in a guy. They WANT, NEED, SEEK, DESIRE, LONG FOR, etc. those things will all their heart, mind, body and soul.

If you "ARE" what I tell you to become you will never think, worry about, consider or be threatened by another guy ever again.

No she won't... there isn't a choice to make as far as she is concerned.

Lol man.

Are you a woman disguised as a male poster?

May 24, 2012

Lol man.

Are you a woman disguised as a male poster?

Nope... I am all man.

Create a thread and post EXACTLY what I said...

You sound very young so let me share with you some advice, knowledge and wisdom on "The Secret" to attracting and keeping the attraction with woman.

I am a guy but my "spidey senses" are picking up traces of desperation, neediness, trying to hard, you trying to be the person you think your date wants, you taking yourself and dating way to seriously, etc.

Now a woman's "spidey senses" are 1,000 times better than mine. Women can spot a man with the above "qualities" a mile away. They find them unappealing and are not attracted to them.

My advice / "The Secret"

1. Get your self-worth, self-esteem, self-image, confidence, "mojo", identity, validation, approval, etc. from within.

2. Have a life / adventure / passions / goals / dreams / etc. of your own instead of trying to make a woman your EVERYTHING.

3. Character, integrity, security, values, morals, sense of humor, sense of adventure, fun, confidence, respect, leadership, etc. play a major role / influence (much more than looks) on who women are attracted too, date, enter into relationships with, fell in love with and marry.

4. Be yourself.

5. Invite a woman to share and take part in your life / adventure / passions / goals / dreams / etc.

Once you learn and do all of that, you will have my kind of success.

and then add in your response and mine...

I mean a woman appreciates those things in a guy.

Any woman that is worth a crap that you date, enter into a relationship with or marry will not just "appreciate" those things in a guy. They WANT, NEED, SEEK, DESIRE, LONG FOR, etc. those things will all their heart, mind, body and soul.

It's just that she has multiple guys chasing after her, so even if you have some of those things that match with her, you're competing with another guy who has matching stuff too or is better looking, etc.

If you "ARE" what I tell you to become you will never think, worry about, consider or be threatened by another guy ever again.

And she will choose.

No she won't... there isn't a choice to make as far as she is concerned.

See what kind of responses you get from the women that you respect, admire, trust and value on here.

EDIT: Nevermind... I will do it for you.

Edited May 24, 2012 by gibson

May 24, 2012

Lol man.
Are you a woman disguised as a male poster?

for the majority of people out there it is not as bad as many of the posts on LS would have you believe. I have worked at numerous different companies, and the % of singles in them is that not that much. I think it is tougher for guys when they are younger, but things swing back as they get older. Gibson's advice is excellent, though I think he underplays the importance of looks (not just in terms of being handsome/pretty but having strong masculinity/femininity), it definitely amplifies 1-4. Also you need to factor in people's expectations and the length of their check off/dealbreaker lists as to how difficult it will be to find someone.

May 24, 2012

Can some regular posters please, PLEASE, come back me up that I've tried everything, and looks aren't everything?

I don't stalk you well enough to be able to say that you've tried everything, but you've certainly told us that you've tried everything. I see no point in denying you your reality. Does that help?

Oh, and looks aren't everything. They're definitely something, though.

May 24, 2012

Though this is actually pretty fun: last month, they decided they'd try making me GAIN weight by eating a ton more.

... And I didn't. My body, no matter the amount of calories, stays right between 120 and 130 pounds.

In that case you might as well tell them to stick their silly diets and switch to eating the "eat what the heck I want" diet. You'll still be between 120 and 130 pounds, but you'll be eating your favourite foods all the time and won't have to feel guilty about cheat days and you won't need to waste time recording what you eat. Sounds like a win to me!

May 24, 2012

You just freaking proved my point. That an attractive woman could still have problems dating, because of her confidence level/personality. So, being attractive is not everything. Thus, it can be difficult for attractive women to date as well.

I mean, I could just as easily turn around and say "Show me an attractive guy with a reasonable personality who can't get a woman."

She's come a long way.

May 24, 2012

She's come a long way.

... Yeah, well, this thread is seriously making me swing back. I am sick to death of guys complaining around me and TO me how hard they have it... like women are just getting swarmed with numbers and offers.

Well I am never swarmed. I'm not even sprinkled. I'd give anything right now to have someone to make out with... just a nice make-out, and I can't find a single interested guy (my male friends are concerned it'd "compromise our friendship.")

So either I'm a freak, or even uglier than I had already claimed. That's the only conclusion male posters on this board lead me to believe, and it's getting far too mentally exhausting to fight it.

May 24, 2012

You live in Utah?

May 24, 2012

... Yeah, well, this thread is seriously making me swing back. I am sick to death of guys complaining around me and TO me how hard they have it... like women are just getting swarmed with numbers and offers.

Well I am never swarmed. I'm not even sprinkled. I'd give anything right now to have someone to make out with... just a nice make-out, and I can't find a single interested guy (my male friends are concerned it'd "compromise our friendship.")

So either I'm a freak, or even uglier than I had already claimed. That's the only conclusion male posters on this board lead me to believe, and it's getting far too mentally exhausting to fight it.

Well, I've said this before (I've seen the batwoman pic) and you looked good. But, I don't want to deny your experience, so I'll just leave it at that.

May 24, 2012

... Yeah, well, this thread is seriously making me swing back. I am sick to death of guys complaining around me and TO me how hard they have it... like women are just getting swarmed with numbers and offers.

Well I am never swarmed. I'm not even sprinkled. I'd give anything right now to have someone to make out with... just a nice make-out, and I can't find a single interested guy (my male friends are concerned it'd "compromise our friendship.")

So either I'm a freak, or even uglier than I had already claimed. That's the only conclusion male posters on this board lead me to believe, and it's getting far too mentally exhausting to fight it.

Guys who say the dating game is very easy for women don't really know what they're talking about

It's very easy for the 10% of women who are young, thin and pretty but the rest definitely have to struggle the same or more than men do

Do you approach guys at all BTW? Do you not even have any success approaching guys if you're as confident as you seem to be on here?

May 24, 2012

No...

My exhusband is your age and obese and has a child (non custodial) and he has more date offers than nights I am not really sure what's going on here.

Perhaps it's living in a major metropolitan area. Dating is not THAT hard, male or female.

Its hard to believe that anything could be as hard as some posts make dating out to be on this forum. I was very scared starting as a single mom, but so far none of that weirdness.

May 24, 2012

It's very easy for the 10% of women who are young, thin and pretty but the rest definitely have to struggle the same or more than men do

You're arguing apples and oranges with her... Some of the "thin and pretty and the rest" can and do certainly struggle, they're just a different form of struggles. Some may deem them as reasonable struggles, others not.

But, you wouldn't possibly know what those struggles are, unless you've asked some of them.

It's difficult to understand how someone, who looks like you do, and says he struggles with finding a girlfriend, can't see the other side of the fence?

May 24, 2012

You're arguing apples and oranges with her... Some of the "thin and pretty and the rest" can and do certainly struggle, they're just a different form of struggles. Some may deem them as reasonable struggles, others not.

But, you wouldn't possibly know what those struggles are, unless you've asked some of them.

It's difficult to understand how someone, who looks like you do, and says he struggles with finding a girlfriend, can't see the other side of the fence?

This. Almost everybody has their own struggles, no matter how well off they may seem or how trivial those struggles look to everyone else.

May 24, 2012

No, its not so bad out there, its actually really good.

Too often its assumed attractive people have it made when it comes to dating and finding love. That's not the case.

May 24, 2012

Come on People!

I thought it was COMMON KNOWLEDGE that finding and ending up with the person you eventually will marry or whatever it is you are looking for is a process that takes time.

Meaning...

You will get rejected, date around, date some winners, date some losers, have several long term relationships that end in a break up, get screwed over, screw some people over, have disappointments, have ups and downs, good days, bad days, make mistakes, learn from your mistakes, your GF / BF picker becomes more selective as you mature and grow, etc.

I am starting to wonder if I am the only person who knows / realizes this.

May 24, 2012

Come on People!

You will get rejected, date around, date some winners, date some losers, have several long term relationships that end in a break up, get screwed over, screw some people over, have disappointments, have ups and downs, good days, bad days, make mistakes, learn from your mistakes, your GF / BF picker becomes more selective as you mature and grow, etc.

And then you'll get divorced an have to do it all over AGAIN....well hopefully not but for some it will happen

May 24, 2012

Being a man who has not been out in the dating scene since before I was 20 years old (Now 36 years old). Is it really that bad where an average guy is not able to date an average girl?

Having read other threads - Why do you feel this way? Are you consistently being rejected by women of an equal plateau or do you have the fear of being rejected?

I believe that every girl I asked out has been in my league.

They've all rejected me.

May 24, 2012

You're arguing apples and oranges with her... Some of the "thin and pretty and the rest" can and do certainly struggle, they're just a different form of struggles. Some may deem them as reasonable struggles, others not.

Yea they're the same kind of struggles when a rich man can only afford the Porsche that costs $150,000 instead of the one that costs $300,000

I feel terrible for the rich men in that situation :(

May 24, 2012

Yea they're the same kind of struggles when a rich man can only afford the Porsche that costs $150,000 instead of the one that costs $300,000

I feel terrible for the rich men in that situation :(

Here you go:

-You’re an object to men.

-You never know why someone likes you.

-You can be intimidating without trying.

-You can come across as aloof even if you’re just shy.

-You’re instantly hated by a lot of other women.

-You’re assumed to be dumb by many men.

-You may be insecure, but people have trouble believing it.

-Men see you as a trophy and all the good guys see you as unattainable and high-maintenance.

-The few men that do approach her are all players who like to play head games just to get into her panties and claim her as a trophy.

-Comments like "your so hot, I want to *blank* on your t*ts.

-Cheap verbal shots from men to make you feel bad about yourself

-Because they’re pretty, generally, nobody gives a f*ck about how hard they may have it ----> which, you just verified with the comment you posted above.

Thank you.

May 24, 2012

Here you go:

This is what the average girl complaining about dating problems sounds like. Hell this is pretty much an exact quote copied from one of the pretty young posters here

"I'm a pretty young girl and dating sucks. There's always a stream of good looking and fun guys who want to have sex or maybe have casual fun, but it's hard to find a guy who is good looking, has the perfect personality and is looking to have a relationship". Keep in mind this is just hot girls who have men approach them, she could have 10 times more success if she actually approached men her self

This is the equivalent of a rich man with a Porsche complaining that it only goes 200 MPH instead of having the top of the line Porsche that goes 250 MPH. Sorry I can't take that seriously, not when I've never been approached by a girl in my life outside of drunken parties and I've never had a girlfriend at the age of 23

Look up the term "first world problems"

May 24, 2012

"I'm a pretty young girl and dating sucks. There's always a stream of good looking and fun guys who want to have sex or maybe have casual fun, but it's hard to find a guy who is good looking, has the perfect personality and is looking to have a relationship"

Which thread are you referring too?

Keep in mind this is just hot girls who have men approach them, she could have 10 times more success if actually approached men her self

Well, you're considered "hot" aren't you? Soooo, what's stopping you?

Insecurity, maybe?

Refer to above post:

"You may be insecure, but people have trouble believing it"

May 24, 2012

Here you go:

-You’re an object to men.
-You never know why someone likes you.
-You can be intimidating without trying.
-You can come across as aloof even if you’re just shy.
-You’re instantly hated by a lot of other women.
-You’re assumed to be dumb by many men.
-You may be insecure, but people have trouble believing it.
-Men see you as a trophy and all the good guys see you as unattainable and high-maintenance.
-The few men that do approach her are all players who like to play head games just to get into her panties and claim her as a trophy.
-Comments like "your so hot, I want to *blank* on your t*ts.
-Cheap verbal shots from men to make you feel bad about yourself
-Because they’re pretty, generally, nobody gives a f*ck about how hard they may have it ----> which, you just verified with the comment you posted above.

Thank you.

This is all exaggerated. I have worked with women who were close to 10s before.

-If you are smart, people will think you are smart.

-Guys will respect you and back off, especially if you have a BF.

-Why would you want to be friends with petty, trite bitches anyway unless you are one yourself, then you probably hate them too.

-If the good guys aren't good looking, you don't want 'em anyway, so you don't want them approaching.

-Vulgar statements like that get made to a lot of women, hot or not.

May 24, 2012

And then you'll get divorced an have to do it all over AGAIN....well hopefully not but for some it will happen

Considering you thought you met "the one" at the young and tender age of 20 who you later married.... How much of the following did you really know and experience?

Come on People!

I thought it was COMMON KNOWLEDGE that finding and ending up with the person you eventually will marry or whatever it is you are looking for is a process that takes time.

Meaning...

You will get rejected, date around, date some winners, date some losers, have several long term relationships that end in a break up, get screwed over, screw some people over, have disappointments, have ups and downs, good days, bad days, make mistakes, learn from your mistakes, your GF / BF picker becomes more selective as you mature and grow, etc.

I am starting to wonder if I am the only person who knows / realizes this.

I am only asking because if I use myself and my friends as an example at 20:

1. We had no idea who we where and we didn't know our a55 from a whole in the ground at 20.

2. We had no idea what LOVE was.

3. We had no idea what FOREVER really meant.

4. What I value, what I think matters, what I think is important now is drastically different than what I thought at 20.

5. We changed more from the ages of 20 - 25 than we have from 25 - 35.

6. Did I mention how immature, clueless and dumb we were back then?

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Come on Guys - Is it really that bad out there?

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