Joexfm Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 Forgive me for the long post but I need some insight to this situation. I was dating this girl that I have always had some sort of feelings for for a few years. In January we hit it off and started going on some dates. Although she was away at college, we would work it out to see each other despite the distance and things were going great. Last month we would not see each other at all because we had very busy schedules and our communication became very off, but I understood because we both had busy schedules. At some points though we would not talk at all and I became worried that things were getting too distant. I saw her again in the beginning of may for the first time in weeks and things were a little better, but then again after that our communication was off because she was busy with finals and senior activities. We barely talked then. I went down to visit her yesterday and all though we had a good time hanging out, I feel that that spark that we had was going out. My strong feelings for her did not feel like they were there as strong and she was kind of being the same way. She was being very distant that night. I'm not sure what to really do at this point. I'm really confused and I feel hurt that things don't feel like they're going the way I thought they would be. I really do not want to lose her because we were friends before this whole thing happened and she is a great girl that I want to keep, relationship or no relationship.
betterdeal Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 It can be very disorienting when your relationship goes beyond the first few months. This is because we become infatuated to begin with as a way to create a strong bond. Now you'e moving into a different period in your relationship; one where although you might not experience the crazy so much, you feel more at one with the other person. This is not to say you'll never have passion again with one another, but it will be part of the relationship, not all of it. Don't worry too much. If you guys are ready for it, you'll find ways to make it work. Part of which is talking to one another about these things. Better to ask, does she feel the same way and what would she like your relationship to become than to worry without knowing. So, in short, try not to worry, it's natural, and talk with one another.
Author Joexfm Posted May 19, 2012 Author Posted May 19, 2012 It can be very disorienting when your relationship goes beyond the first few months. This is because we become infatuated to begin with as a way to create a strong bond. Now you'e moving into a different period in your relationship; one where although you might not experience the crazy so much, you feel more at one with the other person. This is not to say you'll never have passion again with one another, but it will be part of the relationship, not all of it. Don't worry too much. If you guys are ready for it, you'll find ways to make it work. Part of which is talking to one another about these things. Better to ask, does she feel the same way and what would she like your relationship to become than to worry without knowing. So, in short, try not to worry, it's natural, and talk with one another. Thank you for the insight on this. These past 2 months have been really tough on me and I am afraid to move forward with this because I am afraid to really communicate how I feel about this situation. The distance has made things really hard and I am not sure how to rekindle things now.
betterdeal Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 Well, maybe tell her that too. Tell her you'd like to rekindle things and you're afraid and you don't know the answers, but that you want to work with her to make it work again. If she doesn't feel the same way, then may accept that and take a break from one another and get on with life.
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