Not really sure what to make of it.....

[asd159]

Right first of all - I don't really class this as a break up but just looking for some perspective on it all as it's messing with my head!

 

I met this girl at work in January (shes 20 and I'm 27) and thought about asking her out but found out she was engaged so kinda blocked any efforts so I left it.

On a work night out, a couple of months later, I found out she ended it and never really wanted to be with the guy, so we talked and we started a casual 'relationship' (we went on a few trips, round each others houses and to bars etc.).

 

We text each other everyday for hours and spoke at work too - which all culminated in her saying she loved me and she never felt this comfortable with anyone.

 

I fell for this girl in a big way and told he I loved her too.

 

I always wanted more and try to shift the whole 'casual' tag from it, but she said it didn't make much of a difference saying 'I don't want anyone else or you to find anyone else', seemed fair.

 

During the time we were together she text me twice saying she wanted to end it but because of how I felt I talked her round.

The third time she wanted to end it - I decided not to battle back - but she was saying things like 'I can see us moving in together, Marrying and having kids but it's not what I want at the moment' and 'we don't have anything in common'.

 

We kinda argued over text and now she's ignoring me and refuses to talk to me, even tho I texted her saying 'Lets at least be civil as we have to work with each other'.

 

I know I shouldn't be that bothered by it all but after what she said and how I feel about her it just frustrates me

 

Any input would be helpful

 

[KathyM]

Just let her go. She's not invested in the relationship at all, and she's obviously ambivalent about being together, she feels you don't have enough in common with each other, etc. Trying to hold onto something that doesn't work is an exercise in futility. And for her to be making claims of possible future marriage and children with you in the same breath she's distancing herself from you sounds to me like she wants out of the relationship, but she doesn't have the guts to let that sink in with you, so she's giving you false hope to let you down easier. Just let her go. This is not a relationship that has long term potential.