lovinglife21 Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 Hey guys, So I had to contact my ex yesterday (something happened to me and I had to go to the police and mention him) so I had to let him now. He was awful to me, as I expected him to be. But in many ways it's made me feel better, I realise now that he has some serious mental problems, in that he couldn't show compassion even in the worst circumstance, and was damn right rude to me again. He was deliberately being that way to me though, which he has done before, it's part of his crazy defence system. I didn't expect him to be there for me in anyway shape or form, but as another human being he should have at least asked if I was ok. To be civil, apparently that is too much to ask. I can honestly say this morning that I no longer love him and quite frankly want him to rot in hell. I feel so bad about breaking no contact though, and really hope that I'm not going to regress. xx
Hope4anangel Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 Don't feel bad about breaking NC, you had to do it. Although, I think part of you must have wanted to break NC and hoped, perhaps, he would flood you with niceness because something bad happened to you (it's the kind of thing I would do/expect). Any decent human being would ask if you were okay. He is obviously a bit of a knob for being angry and not even asking you!! Sounds like he has some growing up to do. At least you have saw his true colours and you know that this guy is not a nice one and perhaps you can go back to NC and try to heal/move on. Hope you're ok xx (see, I ask and I don't even know you!!) 1
headsashed Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 I couldnt agree with angel more,if i was you id just stick to NC because he doesnt give a damn about you.
Author lovinglife21 Posted May 19, 2012 Author Posted May 19, 2012 (edited) Yeah maybe I hoped for something else, but I think maybe I also hoped he would be a dick, cause then I would be able to realise just how ****ed up he is. And I really see that now. Honestly I feel relieved, like I'm not actually imagining that he is this horrible person, he actually is, it's like reality just hit me square in the face. I'm fully ready to move on now. Thanks I'll be ok Honestly until this stuff happened, I was never planning on contacting him again, and I plan on never again still. xx Edited May 19, 2012 by lovinglife21 men.
headsashed Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 good,it sounds like its the reality check you needed,sometimes we all need that reality check to move on with our lives,hope you stick to nc now and full heal,i know ive got along way to go.
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