waiting4u Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 So I've been single just a little while but I went ahead and reactivated my profile on an online dating site. I've done this before and find that I only meet someone I actually want to date every couple months or so - I'm picky so it's rare - but this time I've been talking to someone who I really like so far. The only problem is that I have a suspicion that he makes a LOT more money than I do. I'm not poor, but I'm a teacher and a single mom with a pretty modest income and some hefty student loans that need paying. I don't live extravagantly. I would NEVER date a man for his money, but I also don't want to get involved with someone who I might really like, only to be dumped early on because he discovers I'm not particularly wealthy. I also don't want to be perceived, because I'm a single mom, as a gold-digger. This guy is like an aero-space engineer or something. It freaks me out. Should I just not even bother going out with him?
SJC2008 Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 You are educated and have a good job with a decent salary. I wouldn't worry about it at all. Usually the women are worried when it's the other way around. Does he know you're a teacher?
pteromom Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 You are only a "gold digger" if it is all about taking and not about giving. There is more to a relationship than money, so if he has a lot of money, great. You can have a lot of whatever YOU have to offer. I would absolutely date him - a good salary isn't everything, but it's definitely a benefit. It allows for fun dates and travel, and of course, if things work out, it's better to be in a LTR/marriage where you don't have to worry about money. 1
Ruby Slippers Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 I've been dating some guys with money lately, and I got some good advice: Evaluate the guy for who he is, regardless of how much money he has. This keeps it nice and simple. Yeah, I need to be with someone who can support himself. But beyond that, it doesn't matter. What matters (to me) is that we're a good match for something lasting. 1
WonderKid Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 Money doesn't make relationships it slaves them. As soon as the money's gone your partner's real colors come out.
FitChick Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 I don't understand this sudden flurry of concern with dating men who make more money than the women. Trust me, I know from experience that these men don't care as long as they are enjoying your company so you shouldn't care either.
Ruby Slippers Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 I don't understand this sudden flurry of concern with dating men who make more money than the women. Trust me, I know from experience that these men don't care as long as they are enjoying your company so you shouldn't care either. Dating guys with a lot of money is a new thing for me, and it does introduce certain concerns. But ultimately, I think you just have to consider each guy for who he is.
fucpcg Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 I've had years I've made $25,000 and I've had years I've made over $250,000. Either way, I play my volleyball leagues, my softball leagues, I hike my dog all over any forest within 100 or so mile radius of me, and I grill my own dinners especially the summer months like now. As you can see, my life isn't built around money. When I've had the good years, the security of it is definitely nice, and maybe I spent more around the house than usual, but not much else changed. Who would I be looking to date those big dollar years? The same girl I always look for, an outdoorsy, comedy club loving, appreciator of The Arts. Seek similar interests, the money won't matter, to him or to you. 1
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