Monm82 Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 If chicks don't like short guys, then explain how all these race jockey's have extremely hot wives? Because they're celebrities/in sports. 1
WonderKid Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 Its just preferences. I know tons of women that are with shorter guys. You just have to be confident and bold. Women will notice that. 1
Content Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 Im 5'8 and never had a problem getting dates,im not saying tall guys arent attactive to women but online blows the importance of height wayyyy out of preportion..its talked about way more here then in public As far as taller women ive dated plenty,women an inch or two taller then me have had less problems with my height then some really short girls 2
FitChick Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 I never thought about the height problem for men until I joined LS. Now I tend to notice all the short men with wives and girlfriends. 2
Quiet Storm Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 Everyone has a right to be attracted to what they are attracted to..Ill never understand people shaming people for attraction..Im only 5'8 and i have physical preferences and wouldnt want people telling me who i should be attracted to..Granted when some women pick high heels over a potential great guy i shake my head but its their right.. My only question of your post is you say a guy is less likely to approach a 6'2 250 lb Man then a 5'8 160 lb man what does that mean? If a man approaches your boyfriend lets say he beats him up do you think hes gonna carry you away on his shoulder like King Kong? Most women get sexually assaulted when theyre alone and if they get assaulted when there boyfriends there it probably means the guy has a weapon and the size of your boyfriend will not matter at that point.. I also think picking tall men because of status is a little immature but to each his own..different things are important to different people.. Logically, I understand your point. In this day & age, I don't need my own personal bodyguard. However. For me, sexual attraction is not logical. It is primal and instinctual. I can tell myself that a short guy is just as sexy and think of many logical reasons why my preference for a tall man is ridiculous, but actually feeling it is a different story. 1
somedude81 Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 Yeah I think it's retarded that women even care about height. A man's height is meaningless. There are many more factors that determine if a man is a better partner, provider, protector, lover than his height. A woman should be willing to date a man of any height as long as he is within the normal range; 5' to 7'. There should be no preference based on height other than wanting somebody who is in close height to herself.
gibson Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 (edited) Yeah I think it's retarded that women even care about height. Would you not say that men are retarded for caring about a women's looks or weight? A man's height is meaningless. There are many more factors that determine if a man is a better partner, provider, protector, lover than his height. Are you going to start dating fat and ugly women since there are many more factors that determine if she is a better partner and lover than her appearance? A woman should be willing to date a man of any height as long as he is within the normal range; 5' to 7'. There should be no preference based on height other than wanting somebody who is in close height to herself. Nobody gives a damn what you think when it comes to who they should or shouldn't be attracted too. We like who like, we are attracted to who we are attracted too, etc. and there isn't a thing you can do / say that is going to change that. Edited May 19, 2012 by gibson 1
somedude81 Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 Would you not say that men are retarded for caring about a women's looks or weight? Are you going to start dating fat and ugly women since there are many more factors that determine if she is a better partner and lover than her appearance? The vast majority look fine when it comes to their face. The most common reason for a messed up face is because of health related issues. The same can be said of weight. I consider somebody who is obese to be unhealthy. And there is nothing wrong with not wanting to be with somebody if they look unhealthy. That being said, a man being a few inches shorter than average, has no bearing on his health, nor does a man being tall. It has no relevance whatsoever.
Badsingularity Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 (edited) Yeah I think it's retarded that women even care about height. A man's height is meaningless. There are many more factors that determine if a man is a better partner, provider, protector, lover than his height. A woman should be willing to date a man of any height as long as he is within the normal range; 5' to 7'. There should be no preference based on height other than wanting somebody who is in close height to herself. You can't tell human nature what it should and shouldn't do. You know by now that there are many many women who will date men on the shorter side. They have told you so themselves. Over and over and over again. Also. I know you have seen me say something like this before and you don't believe me, but I will repeat it again anyway because it is true. A man who knows who he is, has a strong beleif in himself, a will that no one can break, and a certain calm and quiet fearlessness, but is also kind, compassionate, and understanding will be able to tap into that same primal attraction instinct that Quiet Storm is talking about. I am 5'9" and overweight. The way some women respond to me(including my wife who jumps me every chance she gets) and have acted around me you would swear I was a 6'2" male super model. I am not ofcourse and I have flaws, but to these women they might as well not exist. Please understand that a mans aura, presence, and general belief in himself can have a powerful effect on women. Edited May 19, 2012 by Badsingularity 2
Woggle Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 Because of LS when I see a short man with a wife or girlfriend I can't help wondering if she is really attracted to him.
MaxNoob Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 The vast majority look fine when it comes to their face. The most common reason for a messed up face is because of health related issues. Woman with unattractive faces have a much harder time getting dates and it usually has nothing to do with their health. It would make my job a lot easier if I could assess a triage situation just by looking at people's faces, but it doesn't work that way. A droop on one side of the mouth might indicate a stoke and unequal pupil sizes could be a head injury, but usually the face isn't going to indicate anything. I've had cases where a woman looks perfectly normal and is complaining of nothing other than stomach cramps, and 2 minutes later she's dying from a heart attack.
somedude81 Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 Woman with unattractive faces have a much harder time getting dates and it usually has nothing to do with their health. It would make my job a lot easier if I could assess a triage situation just by looking at people's faces, but it doesn't work that way. A droop on one side of the mouth might indicate a stoke and unequal pupil sizes could be a head injury, but usually the face isn't going to indicate anything. I've had cases where a woman looks perfectly normal and is complaining of nothing other than stomach cramps, and 2 minutes later she's dying from a heart attack. Women with unattractive faces are uncommon. I made a thread about this a while ago.
udolipixie Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 (edited) Gals who care about their mate's height tend to do so out of attraction. Taller guys may look better to them or they may associate height with masculinity, security, comfort, and such. Same as guys tend to care about their mate's age and associate youth with femininity, beauty, attractiveness, fun, and exciting. Generally a person's traits don't matter if the other isn't attracted to them. Profound personality traits and accomplishments not mattering if a guy doesn't meet the height requirement is the same as how none of a gals traits matter if she isn't attractive to a guy. In fact most guys wouldn't even have gotten to know these profound personality traits and accomplishments because they wouldn't have approached a gal they found unattractive or weren't attracted to. To me fortunately you're a guy and you have far more leeway than gals do when you attempt in person. Edited May 19, 2012 by udolipixie 1
ThaWholigan Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 This short thing is getting tiring. Please guys, shift your focus AWAY from height, your focus on it is not doing you or your sanity any good. I guarantee you, your height is not stopping you from getting women. I'd bet my life's work on it.
Geoffrey Arnold Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 Maybe this old post of mine will give you some insight http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/325242-am-i-shallow-18.html I made a blog post about your comment here because If found it so amazing. Please take a look at it and let me know what you think. The Social Complex - The Most Interesting Thing I've Read Today Thanks, Geoff A.
Geoffrey Arnold Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 I originally came here in response to a thread about people lying about their height on online dating sites. Since it is locked I guess I will just start from the top. Why do even intelligent women actually care about the height of their mate? I am more than 4 std deviations above normal intelligence and have made over half a million dollars in algorithmic day trading. In person I usually make a strong impression on people but I have ran into some friction when it comes to competing men of greater height... In online dating it seems like a height of less than 6 ft automatically disqualifies you from consideration... No matter how intelligent the woman is all your profound personality traits and accomplishments get multiplied by 0 if you are under 6 ft. In person this isn't true, and I reguarlly humiliate guys who are taller than me... But often times if I do so I am just being "bitter and emotionally immature" and if I don't say anything then the naive perception that the taller guy (who probably mows lawns for a living and is worth 1/10th what I am financially) is more competent persists. I am sorry but I don't feel that some drooling floppy eared moron should get preferential treatment over me just because he is a few inches taller. He is less capable in every way, even in physically combat intelligence and ingenuity is a more potent weapon than just plain size. There is no such thing as "should" in dating. Nothing is fair when it comes to attraction and dating. It sucks that many (most?) women will reject a superior short man for an inferior tall man, but those are the breaks. We all have our irrational likes and dislikes when it comes to dating, and its all good so long as we respect the irrational choices of other people as well. The people who make bad choices mostly hurt themselves in the long run. With all of that being said, I don't think that there is anything wrong with a short man who decides to lie about his height in his profile. After all, nothing is fair in dating. A short guy who lies about his height will increase the number of women he can potentially date. In some cases, exponentially. Geoff A.
Badsingularity Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 I don't think that there is anything wrong with a short man who decides to lie about his height in his profile. After all, nothing is fair in dating. A short guy who lies about his height will increase the number of women he can potentially date. In some cases, exponentially. This may be true, but once they find out that he lied about it. They will be turned off and have a hard time trusting him.
Cracker Jack Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 Yeah, I think it's best to just keep it real about yourself. You might get more prospects in the process, but it might end up just being a huge waste of time. Give her the opportunity to accept you and your height instead of lying about it just to get a date outta her.
Geoffrey Arnold Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 This may be true, but once they find out that he lied about it. They will be turned off and have a hard time trusting him. Most will. But at least he went on the date and he has a chance. For some men, without the lie, there would have been no date in the first place. Plus, it's not true that women care about the lie than they do the height. The fact that he is "shorter than expected" would be more of a turn off than the fact that he lied. Some guys could get around this by wearing shoe lifts. I wouldn't suggest the shoe lifts, but the option is available. Geoff A.
Geoffrey Arnold Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 Yeah, I think it's best to just keep it real about yourself. You might get more prospects in the process, but it might end up just being a huge waste of time. Give her the opportunity to accept you and your height instead of lying about it just to get a date outta her. On most dating sites, members have the ability to filter people out based on various characteristics (i.e., don't show me any profiles of men shorter than XYZ). With that being the case, the profiles of some men won't even be seen by any but a very few women. So I don't see anything wrong if these men want to lie in order to get a chance. The lie is going to come out eventually anyway. It's a self-correcting lie. Geoff A. 1
Quiet Storm Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 I made a blog post about your comment here because If found it so amazing. Please take a look at it and let me know what you think. The Social Complex - The Most Interesting Thing I've Read Today Thanks, Geoff A. I read your blog post. I say in my post that I can't explain my attraction to tall men, and I offer some possible reasons for it. I am not saying those reasons are valid. I was simply trying to find some insight into my own attraction. I don't blame short men for being short, and I mentioned confidence because the short men that do have success with women are often confident & outgoing. If short men do feel discriminated against in the dating world, it is something they have to come to terms and deal with. You can't change other people. People make judgements about others all the time. Letting those judgements get you down kills confidence. Insecurity is unattractive. I don't have an imaginary son. I have two real ones, and a daughter. My oldest is already 6'2" at 16. My youngest is 8. I love them equally no matter what their height. Again, I was simply trying to explore the possible reasons why I prefer a tall guy. Maybe there is some subconscious reason that remains from our ancestors, that has to do with furthering the species. I don't know. Oddly, it seems that the commenter is completely unconcerned that her imaginary short son might face height bigotry. Instead, she seems to be mainly concerned with the prospect that he might develop an inferiority complex based on his treatment. It's not that I am unconcerned that a short son may face hate bigotry, it's just that I accept that people judge others. People are cruddy. It is not shocking to me, it's just the way it is. I am in an interracial marriage with biracial children. We are judged daily. We accept that others judge us, and although unfair, it's reality. Wishing it wasn't so doesn't change it. We could get angry at the injustice of it all, but what good does that do? It would make us angry and bitter. The people doing the judging don't give a crap that you are upset. We don't live in some dreamworld where everyone is fair and non judgmental, and my kids know that already. I raise my kids to be confident, despite the judgement of others. I raise my kids to not be concerned with what others think. I hope that my parenting style will result in confident adults that thrive and succeed in spite of the judgements of others. I don't think short men deserved to be discriminated against, but that doesn't change my sexual attraction. You are trying to make sexual attraction logical, and it is not. As I have said before, it is primal and instinctual. I don't consciously choose my attraction. It is something that happens behind the scenes in my brain, that I am not aware of. Intellectually, I admit that it is illogical and ridiculous, but that doesn't mean my panties will get wet for a short guy. And then, at the end of her commentary, she says (without a hint of irony) “I don’t think I should’ve had to consider the plight of short men when choosing my mate.“ Judging by her misguided but well-thought-out philosophy on the subject; it seems that this is a lie. Clearly she did consider the plight of short men when she chose her husband. I met my husband at fifteen. I am 36 now. I was not thinking about the plight of short men at that time. He was tall and confident, and I noticed him across the high school gym. He flirted, I flirted back and 21 years later, I still think he's hot.
Geoffrey Arnold Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 I read your blog post. I say in my post that I can't explain my attraction to tall men, and I offer some possible reasons for it. I am not saying those reasons are valid. I was simply trying to find some insight into my own attraction. I don't blame short men for being short, and I mentioned confidence because the short men that do have success with women are often confident & outgoing. If short men do feel discriminated against in the dating world, it is something they have to come to terms and deal with. You can't change other people. People make judgements about others all the time. Letting those judgements get you down kills confidence. Insecurity is unattractive. I don't have an imaginary son. I have two real ones, and a daughter. My oldest is already 6'2" at 16. My youngest is 8. I love them equally no matter what their height. Again, I was simply trying to explore the possible reasons why I prefer a tall guy. Maybe there is some subconscious reason that remains from our ancestors, that has to do with furthering the species. I don't know. It's not that I am unconcerned that a short son may face hate bigotry, it's just that I accept that people judge others. People are cruddy. It is not shocking to me, it's just the way it is. I am in an interracial marriage with biracial children. We are judged daily. We accept that others judge us, and although unfair, it's reality. Wishing it wasn't so doesn't change it. We could get angry at the injustice of it all, but what good does that do? It would make us angry and bitter. The people doing the judging don't give a crap that you are upset. We don't live in some dreamworld where everyone is fair and non judgmental, and my kids know that already. I raise my kids to be confident, despite the judgement of others. I raise my kids to not be concerned with what others think. I hope that my parenting style will result in confident adults that thrive and succeed in spite of the judgements of others. I don't think short men deserved to be discriminated against, but that doesn't change my sexual attraction. You are trying to make sexual attraction logical, and it is not. As I have said before, it is primal and instinctual. I don't consciously choose my attraction. It is something that happens behind the scenes in my brain, that I am not aware of. Intellectually, I admit that it is illogical and ridiculous, but that doesn't mean my panties will get wet for a short guy. I met my husband at fifteen. I am 36 now. I was not thinking about the plight of short men at that time. He was tall and confident, and I noticed him across the high school gym. He flirted, I flirted back and 21 years later, I still think he's hot. To be clear, I never said that attraction is rational. Unfortunately, your rationalization of that attraction is misguided and borderline heightist at times. So, for instance, it would not be racist for a man to say "I'm not attracted to Black women". But it might be racist for him to say "there is a good evolutionary reason why black women are the least desired females of all of the races". Do you see the difference? Additionally, while there is value in recognizing that people are cruel, it is not helpful to believe that humans cannot change cultural norms. In this age of Gay Rights, it's clear that notions of social acceptability can be changed through effort. Thanks for responding. Geoff A.
Quiet Storm Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 (edited) So, for instance, it would not be racist for a man to say "I'm not attracted to Black women". But it might be racist for him to say "there is a good evolutionary reason why black women are the least desired females of all of the races". Do you see the difference?I don't think exploring the possible reasons for attraction is biased. Again, I don't know why I prefer tall men. It is just a preference. Why do I prefer NY style foldable pizza over thick crust? Am I biased against thick crust? No. It's just something I like better. Everyone has their likes and dislikes, and not all of them can be logically explained. I agree that social norms can be changed. It would not have been legal for me to marry my black husband if that were not the case, and I am grateful for that. But IMO, social change is about tolerance and acceptance. Not preference. Short men are already tolerated and accepted. They have the same legal rights as others. Some women may not prefer them. And that's okay. Edited May 20, 2012 by Quiet Storm
Geoffrey Arnold Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 I don't think exploring the possible reasons for attraction is biased. Again, I don't know why I prefer tall men. It is just a preference. Why do I prefer NY style foldable pizza over thick crust? Am I biased against thick crust? No. It's just something I like better. Everyone has their likes and dislikes, and not all of them can be logically explained. I agree that social norms can be changed. It would not have been legal for me to marry my black husband if that were not the case, and I am grateful for that. But IMO, social change is about tolerance and acceptance. Not preference. Short men are already tolerated and accepted. They have the same legal rights as others. Some women may not prefer them. And that's okay. Why did we go from talking about people to talking about pizza? Your analogy is invalid but I will leave it at that. First of all, there is a difference between a preference and a requirement. Preferring "A" over "B" does not suggest a bias against "B". But requiring "A" to the exclusion of "B" (that is "I would never 'B'") does suggest a bias against "B". But again, It is OK to have irrational bias against other people when it comes to dating. However, it is wrong to try to rationalize your requirements or sexual attractions through social prejudice. It's not O.K. to cite social prejudice in order to rationalize your romantic attraction. And finally, what do you mean by "short men are already tolerated and accepted"? That statement is false on its face and it makes you look like you are not making an argument in good faith. Unless, of course by, "tolerated and accepted" you meant "regarded as inferior and subject to social discrimination in terms of employment opportunities". You yourself (in the post which sparked my blog post) said that "It seems that taller men have it easier in many aspects of life, not just dating.". So now how can you now say that there is no heightism? How can you say that short men are "accepted"? Geoff A.
Quiet Storm Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 Why did we go from talking about people to talking about pizza? Your analogy is invalid but I will leave it at that. First of all, there is a difference between a preference and a requirement. Preferring "A" over "B" does not suggest a bias against "B". But requiring "A" to the exclusion of "B" (that is "I would never 'B'") does suggest a bias against "B". But again, It is OK to have irrational bias against other people when it comes to dating. However, it is wrong to try to rationalize your requirements or sexual attractions through social prejudice. It's not O.K. to cite social prejudice in order to rationalize your romantic attraction. And finally, what do you mean by "short men are already tolerated and accepted"? That statement is false on its face and it makes you look like you are not making an argument in good faith. Unless, of course by, "tolerated and accepted" you meant "regarded as inferior and subject to social discrimination in terms of employment opportunities". You yourself (in the post which sparked my blog post) said that "It seems that taller men have it easier in many aspects of life, not just dating.". So now how can you now say that there is no heightism? How can you say that short men are "accepted"?I talked about pizza because to me, my preference for a tall man is just another one of the many things that I like. There is nothing wrong with it. It isn't hurting anyone. I'm already married, so no short guys are missing out . You say that by making height a "requirement", it suggests bias. Maybe it does. But sexual attraction is necessary in a relationship and I would not want to be with someone I don't feel that for. I must have desire for my partner, in order to be content in a relationship. The reason I said that short guys are already accepted and tolerated is because you were suggesting that this is a cultural thing that can be changed like Gay Rights. It's not the same. Short men already have the same rights as everyone else. Many people accept gay & interracial marriage, but giving those groups rights did not change anybody's preference. It created an environment of acceptance and tolerance for the choices and preferences of others. So respect my right to have preferences, dude. But anyway, I'm done with this thread and the height debate. Bottom line is that I think tall men are more sexually attractive and I don't know why.
Recommended Posts