amythan Posted May 17, 2012 Posted May 17, 2012 Hi, I am dating this guy and everything is going well but I am not sure about what he wants. In the past I got mistaken and i do not want to go through the same again. I do not want to speed things up or have a commitment right now but i want to know if he sees this as a casual thing (and in this case i would step back) or if he is looking for a relationship. He mentioned he would like to be back to his country so this is why I think he is maybe not that serious. He looks like a good guy, but you never know. We went out a few times and we have slept together. Thanks for your comments !
FrustratedStandards Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 Eek. Don't ask. That's the way to ruin it if it's going somewhere. Just go with the flow. You don't want a serious relationship so just enjoy it for what it is.
goldengirl11 Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 Hi, I am dating this guy and everything is going well but I am not sure about what he wants. In the past I got mistaken and i do not want to go through the same again. I do not want to speed things up or have a commitment right now but i want to know if he sees this as a casual thing (and in this case i would step back) or if he is looking for a relationship. He mentioned he would like to be back to his country so this is why I think he is maybe not that serious. He looks like a good guy, but you never know. We went out a few times and we have slept together. Thanks for your comments ! I personally would ask him where he sees it going. I have regretted not doing so before, especially if have got intimate. Best of luck!
mortensorchid Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 I'd ... Consider moving on. If he has said that he wants to go back to his country of origin soon, and if he has not said "I love you" or anything even close to it by now, he won't say it and you're not coming with him if and when he does move. But whatever you do, don't ask him. It's as good as over if that happens. 1
oaks Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 Just ask him "where is this going?" Since you already said you would take a step back if he only wants something casual then I can't see a down-side to asking and finding out (but perhaps the other posters in this thread will tell me what I'm missing).
newmoon Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 i have always found that if you want to know the answer to this type of question it is best to ask, or ask in a 'reverse' way. instead of asking him what his intentions are, tell him what yours are - what are your needs and can he meet them. start there. tell him what you want and then ask if he can provide that or not. 1
surferchic Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 To a certain extent I understand the reasoning behind not askng when the relationship is too young. However, after you've been seeing someone for a certain period of time what's wrong with asking or having some sort of dialogue about the subject.
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