Author irc333 Posted May 17, 2012 Author Posted May 17, 2012 A smallish southern town where anyone has been coupled up since college. And to clarify, I'm not counting those out of my age range. There are 21 year olds who are single, but that does nothing for me. Yeah, in my smallish town...there's like late teens, early 20's cute cashier's though....but some have baby bumps or have thug-like boyfriends., have nose rings or some crap. There was this one VERY pretty and rather unbelieveably intelligent cashier, probably hardly drinking age....I noticed a wedding ring on her finger....she said she was married with 2 children, adn ONE on the way. I kept myself tongue in cheek and almost said, "Dang how OLD are you , you hardly look even drinking age, and your married with children??" I remember after I got out of the military and I moved back into town, early 20's, and that's when I was trying to scope out women my age. There's actually a small town vocational school where I live, and I started my education there, but I couldn't flirt or hit on any women, because they were either 1. Engaged 2. Were still dating dudes they went to the local highschools with. And it was a pretty unsocial campus, too, after noon time, it was desolate..most classes are over with and everyone goes home.
Disenchantedly Yours Posted May 17, 2012 Posted May 17, 2012 You are creating the exact problem you claim you don't like Irc.
Oxy Moronovich Posted May 17, 2012 Posted May 17, 2012 This thread is BullSh*t. I would have loved to be married by now...at least ideally. But I am not. Don't you dare tell me it's because my expectatione are so enormous is the only reason a woman is single. I have dated men of all heights, weights, looks and financial backgrounds. Please stop supporting stereotypes for women and relationships when you do not want the same stereotypes made about men and relationships. Yes, you've dated a variety of men but married to none of them. So the common denominator here is you. Besides, how the hell can you be "ideally" married?
FrustratedStandards Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 I don't think that's it. The 50 year old single guy that I mentioned in your other post, he isn't shallow at all. In fact, he wanted to get married with this one woman he loved so much, but the problem was.....his ego and his mom. First of all, he had this "i'm the man so what I say goes" attitude, and his mom lives with him. But that's not the problem. He takes his mom on his vacations with his girlfriends, his mom still does his laundry, she cooks for him. This guy doesn't even know how to be independent from her! That's why they didn't get married. She doesn't want to live with her husband while he depends on his mom for everything. So no, I wouldn't say it's shallowness. Shallow people still get married. It's the ugly and shallow people who have it easier to find partners since there are so many of these people out there.
fishtaco Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 What about people that are not married because they don't want to? So is it worth it to intentionally get divorced once so you won't have these assumptions hanging over you?
xxoo Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 What about people that are not married because they don't want to? So is it worth it to intentionally get divorced once so you won't have these assumptions hanging over you? If a person doesn't want to marry, that's fine and great. People start wondering when a person claims to be looking for a marriage partner at 40+, but has never married up to that point. For right or wrong, people wonder, and make assumptions.
FrustratedStandards Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 What about people that are not married because they don't want to? So is it worth it to intentionally get divorced once so you won't have these assumptions hanging over you? There are plenty of people who don't want to get married, but eventually they will settle. No one wants to end up alone. If they can't even settle, then that's an even bigger indicator of their problems.
fishtaco Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 There are plenty of people who don't want to get married, but eventually they will settle. No one wants to end up alone. If they can't even settle, then that's an even bigger indicator of their problems. What do you mean by settle? LTR?
FrustratedStandards Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 What do you mean by settle? LTR? By settling I mean marrying or getting serious with the next best thing. If at a certain age you still haven't found anything decent, then you may as well be with anyone at all. It's far better than dying alone. That's why people get less and less picky as they get older. They just want to be with someone and it gets to a point where you don't care who it is, as long as you're not alone.
xxoo Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 By settling I mean marrying or getting serious with the next best thing. If at a certain age you still haven't found anything decent, then you may as well be with anyone at all. It's far better than dying alone. That's why people get less and less picky as they get older. They just want to be with someone and it gets to a point where you don't care who it is, as long as you're not alone. Some people grow up and figure out what is important (connection, love) and what is not (looks, bank acct). When in love, there is no settling.
Author irc333 Posted May 18, 2012 Author Posted May 18, 2012 Good point, when people start reaching the AARP stage in their lives....they definately will stop being picky. LOL Seen it myself and from what I hear from the employees at the retirement communties. People pretty much go for whatever is available. By settling I mean marrying or getting serious with the next best thing. If at a certain age you still haven't found anything decent, then you may as well be with anyone at all. It's far better than dying alone. That's why people get less and less picky as they get older. They just want to be with someone and it gets to a point where you don't care who it is, as long as you're not alone.
iris219 Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 Some people grow up and figure out what is important (connection, love) and what is not (looks, bank acct). When in love, there is no settling. Good point, when people start reaching the AARP stage in their lives....they definately will stop being picky. LOL Seen it myself and from what I hear from the employees at the retirement communties. People pretty much go for whatever is available. When I use the term “settling” I think of ending up with someone I don’t love. Maybe this works for some people once they get to a certain age. It’s not that hard to find attractiveness or money. It’s very difficult to find someone you have a real emotional connection with and who you’re compatible with. When IRC says women are picky, that to me means they are holding out for someone they will fall in love with. When they meet this person, you’d be surprised how little looks or money matter. 1
xxoo Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 When IRC says women are picky, that to me means they are holding out for someone they will fall in love with. In that regard, none of us can be too picky! Marriage without genuine love (not based on looks or money) just won't work. 1
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