metalambience Posted May 14, 2012 Posted May 14, 2012 For starters condolences to anyone with a family member in the middle east or hurt by terrorists. My question is are white girls less accepting of middle eastern guys (almost everyone where I live is white) post 9/11 with all the negative imagery, bad portrayals (ex. The Dictator Movie, Fox News, video games, etc), and racial profiling that has been happening? More than one occasion I've had a girl thinking I was a cute latino run the other way when I say i'm middle eastern (and I'm not even muslim/ am clean shaven/ wear European brands). If you're females do you find brown guys visually unattractive, or is it cultural stereotypes that keep you away?
Negative Nancy Posted May 14, 2012 Posted May 14, 2012 there's nothing to be ruined about something that has never been attractive in the first place, if u know what i mean
WhiteChocolate Posted May 14, 2012 Posted May 14, 2012 From observing my Middle Eastern friends, I'd say the people who would run the other way once they find out your ethnicity are ignorant bigots who you wouldn't want to date anyways. Most intelligent, educated, caring, and empathetic individuals realize that not all Muslims are terrorists, and will be able to treat you just like any other person. So I think it's actually a bullet dodged for you. Also, if girls aren't interested in dating you, it won't be all for one reason. One girl may just find you not handsome, another will find you uninteresting, another may just not want to take you home to her parents. People are different and complex, and not everyone has the same motives.
january2011 Posted May 14, 2012 Posted May 14, 2012 Sweeping generalisation coming up: no, terrorists ruined religion, not dating. Dating is about individual preferences. If one girl does not prefer you, then you're going to have to try another girl. One anecdote does not a trend make. And no, I do not find "brown guys" visually unattractive. And while I might have certain prejudices about anyone due to ignorance, getting to know the individual person usually dispels them.
GorillaTheater Posted May 14, 2012 Posted May 14, 2012 When I started college, not long after the Iran hostage crisis, my lab partner in geology was from Pakistan. Good guy. He talked about being confronted by rednecks wanting to know where he was from. He'd tell them he was Mexican. See? There's always options. 1
Author metalambience Posted May 14, 2012 Author Posted May 14, 2012 I don't think being either middle eastern or mexican would bode well with the red necks- though one said he would pay me $0.75 to pick apples hahaha I say I'm from Tuvalu or Comoros or Gambia because they usually don't even know those are countries, let alone what someone from there looks like
GorillaTheater Posted May 14, 2012 Posted May 14, 2012 I don't think being either middle eastern or mexican would bode well with the red necks- though one said he would pay me $0.75 to pick apples hahaha I say I'm from Tuvalu or Comoros or Gambia because they usually don't even know those are countries, let alone what someone from there looks like LOL! "Yeah baby, once you go Nauru, you never go back."
EricaH329 Posted May 14, 2012 Posted May 14, 2012 I personally haven't experienced someone turn down a muslim or a man from the middle east because of terrorism. I've never heard a girl say, "Oh, he was cute, until I realized he looks like a terrorist." I've dated a few muslims, and I still would if I found the right one. Anyone who is turned off of middle easterners because of 9/11 are ignorant. They should be turned off of terrorists, not the entire group of muslims/middle easterners.
Els Posted May 14, 2012 Posted May 14, 2012 Troll? You're the first Middle Easterner I've known to call themselves a 'brown guy'...
Author metalambience Posted May 14, 2012 Author Posted May 14, 2012 Troll? You're the first Middle Easterner I've known to call themselves a 'brown guy'... nope not troll....first be used to being called Sand Nig**r all the time then consider nomenclature norms
El Brujo Posted May 15, 2012 Posted May 15, 2012 nope not troll....first be used to being called Sand Nig**r all the time then consider nomenclature norms Strange... I refer to myself as a honky, and for some unknown reason, this scares the crap out of people. BTW my neighbor and best male buddy is Mexican, but he gets mistaken for Arabic all the time... he does in fact look like Sirhan Sirhan's 1968 mug shot. "Brown" can mean any number of ethnicities.
kaylan Posted May 15, 2012 Posted May 15, 2012 (edited) Lol terrorists didnt do anything. Its just that for the time being, brown men arent overtly sexualized in Western culture the same way Asian women and Black men are. For all the negative stereotypes that black men have to put up with, we still get sexually fetishized anyways. So based on that Id think a few bad brown apples who decide to be terrorists arent going to make everyone who meets you dislike you. I think brown men just havent had their chance in the spotlight yet due to the totality in which Western culture view them. Honestly though dude, if you are brown, have an American accent, have some style, and are a good looking cat, you will have plenty of women who find you to be sexy and wanting to jump your bones because they find you exotic. The thing which holds brown men back is culture clash though, not terrorists making them look bad.When I started college, not long after the Iran hostage crisis, my lab partner in geology was from Pakistan. Good guy. He talked about being confronted by rednecks wanting to know where he was from. He'd tell them he was Mexican. See? There's always options. Lmao. Mexican isnt an option today though. Rednecks dislike Mexicans too now. Edited May 15, 2012 by kaylan
mesmerized Posted May 15, 2012 Posted May 15, 2012 Lol terrorists didnt do anything. Its just that for the time being, brown men arent overtly sexualized in Western culture the same way Asian women and Black men are. For all the negative stereotypes that black men have to put up with, we still get sexually fetishized anyways. So based on that Id think a few bad brown apples who decide to be terrorists arent going to make everyone who meets you dislike you. I think brown men just havent had their chance in the spotlight yet due to the totality in which Western culture view them. I dunno about that, a lot of middle eastern men are apparently considered very attractive. Indian men are considered less attractive where I am and there is an obvious distinction in looks between Indians and middle eastern people. To respond to the OP, yes, the stereotypes have ruined it for middle eastern people in general as people here find the culture strange or scary. 1
kaylan Posted May 15, 2012 Posted May 15, 2012 But I hear middle eastern men having the same problems as Indian men. And these are American guys without accents. And they tend to have similar physical characteristics. They also similarly have culture clashes with people of non Eastern culture...thats where I see the problem arising from. A lot of women dont wanna deal with what they see as a super conservative and religious culture. I really dont see the obvious distinction on looks unless we are talking about very dark indians. Either way, Middle Eastern and Indian people come from the same genetic totem pole and can both vary in their looks. Its possible for an Egyptian to look similar to a north Indian and look very different from a Yemeni. Based on what Ive read on these forums, and heard from other folks, the culture clash seems to keep people apart...that or the assumption that there will be a culture clash without giving things a shot.
insertnamehere Posted May 15, 2012 Posted May 15, 2012 Did you see how many wives bin Laden had? Clearly brown men got game.
mesmerized Posted May 15, 2012 Posted May 15, 2012 But I hear middle eastern men having the same problems as indian men. And these are American guys without accents. And they tend to have similar physical characteristics. They also similarly have culture clashes with people of non Eastern culture...thats where I see the problem arising from. I really dont see the obvious distinction on looks unless we are talking about very dark indians. Either way, Middle Eastern and Indian people come from the same genetic totem pole and can both vary in their looks. Its possible for an Egyptian to look similar to a north Indian and look very different from a Yemeni. hmmm, maybe I don't see it. Would you say greek or italians look like indians as well? Personally, I'm mistaken to be from those countries a lot yet I was never mistaken for being indian. In fact I jokingly told a few indian guys I'm indian and they didn't believe it. And I don't know, I just go with what women tell me. A lot of women here tend to find middle eastern guys attractive and date them. I think the culture is a bigger obstacle for middle eastern men (they're considered threatening, it's no secret how bad women are treated in Islam) than their looks. Again, this could be the area that I live in.
kaylan Posted May 15, 2012 Posted May 15, 2012 (edited) My point was that Indians dont all look the same, nor do Middle Eastern folks. The middle east is large and varied and so is India. I wouldnt go on what the average person thinks people looks like. A girl might tell me shes not attracted to Latin American men because shed assume they are all short brown men (which many americans assume since a lot of our Latin American folks are Mexican) But Latin Americans (Mexicans included), can be of any race and therefore of many different types of looks. Its possible for an Indian of one region to look very different to an Indian of another region. Same goes for Middle Eastern people. Which means its also possible for an Indian person to look dissimlar to Indian of certain regions of Indian, but similar to some people of the Middle East. If I didnt know Ahmedenijad (Iranian President) was Iranian, someone could tell me he was Pakistani or Indian and Id believe it. Hell, even I have been told before that I have "Asian eyes" even though Im 100% African American. Though I could easily fool people and tell them Im half or a quarter Southeast Asian if I wanted to. Ive tested it on a few occasions and was always met with a "I knew you were mixed with something" type of answer. Edited May 15, 2012 by kaylan 2
mesmerized Posted May 15, 2012 Posted May 15, 2012 My point was that Indians dont all look the same, nor do Middle Eastern folks. The middle east is large and varied and so is India. I wouldnt go on what the average person thinks people looks like. A girl might tell me shes not attracted to Latin American men because shed assume they are all short brown men (which many americans assume since a lot of our Latin American folks are Mexican) But Latin Americans (Mexicans included), can be of any race and therefore of many different types of looks. Its possible for an Indian of one region to look very different to an Indian of another region. Same goes for Middle Eastern people. Which means its also possible for an Indian person to look dissimlar to Indian of certain regions of Indian, but similar to some people of the Middle East. If I didnt know Ahmedenijad (Iranian President) was Iranian, someone could tell me he was Pakistani or Indian and Id believe it. True, I guess for me it's just easier to tell them apart since I'm from the area. Others might not see it. Just like how a lot of Europeans or Asians look the same to me. And Latinos have some hot ass men! Men from Argentina and Brazil specifically, YUM!
EricaH329 Posted May 15, 2012 Posted May 15, 2012 The thought that some middle eastern women are treated poorly has crossed my mind. That may be a reason why some women steer clear of M.E. men. Personally, i've noticed the one who are from America don't treat women poorly. Not the M.E. men i've dated, at least. They were all very polite and considerate. I do think that, as far as who dates them goes, it's a personal preference. I don't tend to find Indian men attractive, but I do find M.E. men attractive.
irin Posted June 16, 2012 Posted June 16, 2012 i have a few white friends that strictly date arab guys. marhaba!
El Brujo Posted June 16, 2012 Posted June 16, 2012 Relax, this too shall pass. A hundred years ago, the Chinese were demonized in the US so much that the Pacific states passed laws that said you had to either be black or white to own land---Chinese people were considered neither black nor white. And before that, after the Irish Famine of the 1840s, the Irish were demonized. Nowadays Chinese-Americans and Irish-Americans aren't so stigmatized. Eventually the negativity toward Middle Easterners will peter out.
mickleb Posted June 16, 2012 Posted June 16, 2012 (edited) it's no secret how bad women are treated in Islam I'm going to go ahead and disagree with you on that one. I would say the reverse is true. I teach mostly Muslim students and have witnessed a huge amount of respect given from the men to the ladies. The version of Islam favoured by military dictatorships is, of course, all about control. Please remember that the majority of people who live with such oppression are normal, decent people like you or I, and they despise the brutal interpretation of their faith that is enforced upon them. And that all religions have extremist interpretations that (by definition) most people would not advocate. One could argue that strict Catholicism is no picnic for women, either, but there would still be many who have had very positive experiences via such an upbringing. To the OP, I would say that, of course, the demonisation of Islam in the press since 9/11 has done few Middle Easterners many favours but would also say that, sadly, ignorance is everywhere and always will be. (I'm pretty ignorant on a good deal of subjects, myself!) Dating tends to showcase ignorance because (by its nature) it involves so much judgement. Fortunately, in most countries, if we are happy with who we are, it doesn't matter why others might not be. P.S. There's something quite hilarious about your thread title, I'm hoping that was intentional? Edited June 16, 2012 by mickleb
Sanman Posted June 16, 2012 Posted June 16, 2012 Troll? You're the first Middle Easterner I've known to call themselves a 'brown guy'... Lol, not necessarily. I refer to myself as a brown guy all the time. You just need a sense of humor. What can brown do for you?
Emilia Posted June 16, 2012 Posted June 16, 2012 I'm going to go ahead and disagree with you on that one. I would say the reverse is true. I teach mostly Muslim students and have witnessed a huge amount of respect given from the men to the ladies. That's because you don't know what it's like to be patronised in a paternal society. When you are trying to do something and the men push you aside to help the 'little woman'. That's a mild form of it. OP, no it's not that I would think that you are a terrorist, it's that I have no desire to date a man who has overtly paternalistic views, that's all.
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