If your ex betrayed your trust and hurt you, would you want them to apologize?

[sakiiru]

I'm not talking about an apology to get back together or anything like that. If they were sincerely sorry for what they did, and they apologized, would it:

 

- help the healing process

- be considered a selfish move on their part

- just interrupt your healing process and you would rather not hear from them at all?

[desertsessions]

i would really appreciate it, if i knew it was sincere.

[lilyblue]

i would really appreciate it, if i knew it was sincere.

 

Agree. It would help me heal.

[Coffee20]

i would really appreciate it, if i knew it was sincere.

 

yes, if he would really mean it, it would definitely help me a lot

[MissBrunette84]

Yes, if he meant it and really meant it then yes as I've admitted my faults, apologised and even tried to better myself. He, on the other hand says nothing. So to admit anything would be nice lol

[shayla]

A sincere apology would have helped me alot. If he would have told me, "I'm sorry for the way this all happened, I got caught up and there was never a good time to tell you." I would have been pissed, no doubt, but I would have appreciated his honesty.

 

Instead I got, "We've been broken up for a year, we need to get on with our lives, sorry I took your 2 years....a complete lie.

 

We were still together, we had been together for 3 years, and the life I was supposed to get on with was the life we were still sharing together.

 

And that is what still makes me so furious.

[Radu]

I'm not talking about an apology to get back together or anything like that. If they were sincerely sorry for what they did, and they apologized, would it:

 

- help the healing process

- be considered a selfish move on their part

- just interrupt your healing process and you would rather not hear from them at all?

 

My ex's did hurt my trust and did hurt me. What hurt the most was the fact that they didn't care if they hurt me.

 

I don't want an apology from them, an apology would mean face time or acces to me.

 

I just want them gone from active memory, from my thoughts ... it's enough.

[sakiiru]

My ex's did hurt my trust and did hurt me. What hurt the most was the fact that they didn't care if they hurt me.

 

I don't want an apology from them, an apology would mean face time or acces to me.

 

I just want them gone from active memory, from my thoughts ... it's enough.

 

What if they did something that didn't require face time, like a letter?

[spice4life]

In my case, I know an apology would help my healing process. I would then be able to completely let go.

 

In answering your other question about face to face or a letter; I prefer face to face, but I don't think he has the courage to do that. The way I was betrayed was extremely hurtful and has left me scarred. I simply cannot get past the way he went about it and he never offered an explanation. It would help if he just came clean with me and apologize like he requested of me (and I honored his request without hesitation because I did truly love him and care about him). I guess our characters are different in that way. When I have wronged someone, I am more than willing to right that wrong and have no problem admitting my mistakes. I think it helps one grow and evolve.

 

It's nice to dream, but I don't think it will ever happen though.

[Joaquin]

To my mind someone who apologises for something they did is doing so to make themselves feel better. It's actually quite a selfish act, unless it is followed up by true remorse which is shown through actions, not words, and usually by not doing the same thing again.

 

Unfortunately, in relationships that are over the person doesnt get the chance to show such true remorse, so settling for a 'I'm sorry I screwed your best friend...' from someone who turned you over is a bit pathetic. But I suppose some people like to hear it, although they aren't the one really benefitting from it.

 

Closure comes from within.