No control of my anger

[somedude81]

So it's only May and so far this year, I've broken three video game controllers, one game, threw a shoe through one of my apartment windows after getting a parking ticket and every now and then after reading something on this forum, I get an overwhelming urge to just toss my mouse in disgust. I also occasionally hit myself when I think of something that makes me hate myself. I'm also prone to randomly cursing my old obsession when I'm alone.

 

It it's not obvious, I'm not happy.

 

Thankfully I haven't hurt anybody or broken something really expensive. But this is obviously not good.

 

There are so many things that piss me off and of the few things that I actually enjoy, some of them can end up pissing me off.

 

That controller that I just broke, was my last one. I'm not too eager about buying another one, because without any sort of change, I'll end up breaking that one aswel.

Edited May 12, 2012 by somedude81

[Comfortably Numb]

I actually can relate to you. I used to be very high tempered. And at times violent. I punched my room door off the hinges and split it right down the middle. And many a controller have I broken. Often, before I get to this point. I take a deep breath, and just walk away. Especially, now more so, I have been getting back to working out I do feel less of that anger. I think sometimes life and all the stress just build up. Nowhere to go. Got to stay level headed and realize what the repercussions of your actions will be. Especially when it starts adding up. Controllers aren't cheap! Maybe look into anger management.

[Art_Critic]

Do you take any over the counter decongestants that contain pseudoephedrine ?

[somedude81]

I actually can relate to you. I used to be very high tempered. And at times violent. I punched my room door off the hinges and split it right down the middle. And many a controller have I broken. Often, before I get to this point. I take a deep breath, and just walk away. Especially, now more so, I have been getting back to working out I do feel less of that anger. I think sometimes life and all the stress just build up. Nowhere to go. Got to stay level headed and realize what the repercussions of your actions will be. Especially when it starts adding up. Controllers aren't cheap! Maybe look into anger management.

Problem is that the out bursts are seemingly random. I can be fine, have something happen and then I'm set up.

 

Like Bruce Banner, I'm always angry.

 

Do you take any over the counter decongestants that contain pseudoephedrine ?

Nope, I don't any medications.

[somedude81]

One thing I absolutely hate, is that my apartment complex has an open courtyard that every unit faces, and every single day there's a a bunch of kids making so much fu*king noise. I'd keep windows and door closed so I wouldn't have to hear them, but then my apartment gets so fu*king hot. It's 7 PM and 83 inside and only 70 outside. But if I want to get a cool breeze, I have to deal with the kids.

[ThaWholigan]

Have done this before. I used to actually physically punch myself when I was upset because I wanted to hit something. I used to hit walls, but in my house I always end up going through the plaster, and my mum gets upset.

 

I have extraordinarily long patience and am very tolerant, but that is down to control. I cannot afford to lose it because I lose my temper extremely quickly, so I learned techniques to calm myself down. I started to breathe deeply and count my breaths, then I got into meditation which I do occasionally. I also used to write a lot, songs, poetry etc. So I had channels to put that energy into. I now need to find a physical outlet for that anger, and I have already earmarked martial arts as that channel, however I need to be able to afford it.

 

Now, I am not sure if you can cite anything positive in your life (I hope you can), but if you can't, then this will be a doubly hard process for you. If you repress your anger and you have no outlet, either creative or physical, then you will almost certainly run the risk of it spilling over somehow. It may not be violent, but it will come out, sometimes you may even burst into a fit of tears. I usually experienced both, I would hit stuff (wall, door), then I would cry real hard for about 3 mins. Then I would be fine afterwards.

 

I think you should do martial arts. I believe I recommended it for you in my first ever post on this forum . I think it would be good for your state of mind, it will teach you a level of personal discipline above your current level, you will reap physical, mental and spiritual benefits......and you'll be able to fight on a relatively basic level too .

 

Secondly, I think you need a creative pursuit of some sort. I don't want to hear "but I'm not talented, I can't....", even if you are crap at it, it's still an outlet, and there are torrents you can download to help you. You could write (you're funny, I'm sure writing would suit you), learn guitar or piano, act, do improv etc. Really see what else is out there you can do creatively. Even drawing, learn to draw anime or something, even on a low level, it can be therapeutic. Keeping a journal could be a good way to track your thoughts.

 

You need to reconcile with what's pissing you off and come to terms with it. Then move from there. All the things that you can't change, accept. All the things you can change that you aren't happy with, find ways to change it. There are ways you know.

 

Don't be one of those people who places all these things outside of their control, because you really can change your life and become happier.

[somedude81]

Oh yeah, a body size mirror fell of my wall today for no reason whatsoever. That was really nice. Now I have a huge mess of glass in my bedroom that I just don't want to deal with.

[Feelin Frisky]

Prozac really worked for me for that. And a month's supply at Walmart is $4. You could keep breaking stuff but indulging your anger like that could also mean breaking blood vessel in your head one day. If you survive, you may have to be spoon fed.

[freestyle]

Do you own a punching bag?

 

Seriously, if you took the time to put on boxing gloves, and show the bag who's boss---you could work a lot of that out of your system.

 

There's nothing wrong with being angry--is just a matter of learning how to channel it properly---so you don't have to buy new stuff..........

[gaius]

Do you own a punching bag?

 

Seriously, if you took the time to put on boxing gloves, and show the bag who's boss---you could work a lot of that out of your system.

 

There's nothing wrong with being angry--is just a matter of learning how to channel it properly---so you don't have to buy new stuff..........

What he said. I always have my weight set on standby in case I need to wear myself out.

[somedude81]

Nah, I don't have a bag or any room in my apartment to put one. It would certainly help with my urge to break things when I get mad. Which is just way too often.

 

I do need to look into more ways to express myself.

[Comfortably Numb]

Adjustable dumbbells, weight bands. Kettle balls. Lots of means to release energy constructively that require very little room.

[ThaWholigan]

Nah, I don't have a bag or any room in my apartment to put one. It would certainly help with my urge to break things when I get mad. Which is just way too often.

 

I do need to look into more ways to express myself.

If you can afford it, get one of those freestanding punch bags from Everlast. I want to get one but I have no room. I barely have enough room to swing my kettlebell about .

 

How do you feel like expressing yourself? What do you seem drawn towards?

[Star Gazer]

One thing I absolutely hate, is that my apartment complex has an open courtyard that every unit faces, and every single day there's a a bunch of kids making so much fu*king noise. I'd keep windows and door closed so I wouldn't have to hear them, but then my apartment gets so fu*king hot. It's 7 PM and 83 inside and only 70 outside. But if I want to get a cool breeze, I have to deal with the kids.

 

I had a similar problem living in LA at one particular apartment complex/building (it was like Melrose Place, 2 stories surrounding a pool), and I turn into a major b*tch when I'm hot OR disturbed by noise.

 

I found the perfect solution: I moved.

 

Problem solving, SD. C'mon now.

[OhHey]

One thing I absolutely hate, is that my apartment complex has an open courtyard that every unit faces, and every single day there's a a bunch of kids making so much fu*king noise. I'd keep windows and door closed so I wouldn't have to hear them, but then my apartment gets so fu*king hot. It's 7 PM and 83 inside and only 70 outside. But if I want to get a cool breeze, I have to deal with the kids.

 

Ceiling fan, air conditioner?

 

I think finding a solution to the reasons you get so pissed is what you have to do not merely getting a punching bag. This isn't normal to be 30 years old and breaking things out of rage. Even I do not get that pissed off.

 

It's the irritations in your life doing it...like sour relationships and the stuff you say on here. That will take time to fix, but you can learn better ways to control your anger over it for now. I find my anger fuels the pedals on my MT bike...When I get mad I'll power stroke that bitch till I sweat bullets.... Then I will calm down.

 

Our you seeing a counselor man? You're one that I worry about on here besides Vehzn and Ross.... All three of ya shout out signs that I know and feel....I know how bad it gets.

 

I hope you're getting offline help with your problems as well.

[firemanq]

During the divorce, I split lots of fire wood, in really small pieces. Then I went to the woods and dropped more trees, took them home and made more firewood. The gym helped some, but the firewood was the best. Then, after the divorce, when I started dating again, I calmed down and fixed the holes in the sheet rock.

[somedude81]

Adjustable dumbbells, weight bands. Kettle balls. Lots of means to release energy constructively that require very little room.

Weight lifting doesn't actually help. And I have tried lifting while angry to blow it off and it just doesn't do anything.

I had a similar problem living in LA at one particular apartment complex/building (it was like Melrose Place, 2 stories surrounding a pool), and I turn into a major b*tch when I'm hot OR disturbed by noise.

 

I found the perfect solution: I moved.

 

Problem solving, SD. C'mon now.

I've been in SoCal for four years and this is the forth place I've lived in so far. It's easily the best place and the rent is cheap. But the kids really hurt the place. I think I'll start looking for other places soon.

How do you feel like expressing yourself? What do you seem drawn towards?

Nothing. There isn't anything.

 

It just feels like I'm passing time. But there isn't anything coming.

Ceiling fan, air conditioner?

Ceiling fan is always going. Air conditioner can only keep the place from getting above 80 no matter what I set it to. I'm hot at around 73.

I think finding a solution to the reasons you get so pissed is what you have to do not merely getting a punching bag. This isn't normal to be 30 years old and breaking things out of rage. Even I do not get that pissed off.

 

It's the irritations in your life doing it...like sour relationships and the stuff you say on here. That will take time to fix, but you can learn better ways to control your anger over it for now.

Yes, it is my life that fuels my anger and it is getting worse. It feels like I'm changing. And not in a good way. I just feel like fate's punching bag. It has to bring me down.

I find my anger fuels the pedals on my MT bike...When I get mad I'll power stroke that bitch till I sweat bullets.... Then I will calm down.

When I ride, my thoughts come out in full force. I try to avoid long rides because I'm just angry the whole time.

 

Our you seeing a counselor man? You're one that I worry about on here besides Vehzn and Ross.... All three of ya shout out signs that I know and feel....I know how bad it gets.

 

I hope you're getting offline help with your problems as well.

I've already seen a few counselors. They haven't really done anything for me. A counselor only treats the symptoms and not the actual problem.

 

Somehow I'm going to have to get my issues fixed before I end up hurting myself or somebody else. And that thought scares me.

[OhHey]

 

Somehow I'm going to have to get my issues fixed before I end up hurting myself or somebody else. And that thought scares me.

 

Don't be afraid to get the required help for yourself. They can give you the tools to cope and manage those thoughts as well as drugs if need be.

 

Don't feel ashamed or any of that bull****....life is damn hard and sometimes we need some TLC to get back on track.....

 

Dude, if you think "someone" is going to get hurt when you get in those moods.... Walk into a hospital and don't be afraid to let go....they'll help you and at least deter the immediate threat....you get what I am telling you here?

 

 

 

Please get some phone numbers and things in plain site if you need them.

[whichwayisup]

So it's only May and so far this year, I've broken three video game controllers, one game, threw a shoe through one of my apartment windows after getting a parking ticket and every now and then after reading something on this forum, I get an overwhelming urge to just toss my mouse in disgust. I also occasionally hit myself when I think of something that makes me hate myself. I'm also prone to randomly cursing my old obsession when I'm alone.

 

It it's not obvious, I'm not happy.

 

Thankfully I haven't hurt anybody or broken something really expensive. But this is obviously not good.

 

There are so many things that piss me off and of the few things that I actually enjoy, some of them can end up pissing me off.

 

That controller that I just broke, was my last one. I'm not too eager about buying another one, because without any sort of change, I'll end up breaking that one aswel.

 

Time for anger management and find another therapist. Seriously, letting things like this get to you so much is going to ruin your life.

 

I've already seen a few counselors. They haven't really done anything for me. A counselor only treats the symptoms and not the actual problem.

 

Somehow I'm going to have to get my issues fixed before I end up hurting myself or somebody else. And that thought scares

 

Keep looking. Even try CBT (cognitive behaviour therapy). WHen you find the right person, you'll know immediately.

[FitChick]

Go outside for a run or buy a rebounder and run and jump on it.

 

Buy some guided meditation tapes.

 

Cut back on caffeine and sugar.

 

Don't start down that slippery slope of pharmaceuticals.

 

Actually, the one things that would help you quickly is the Lefkoe Method. Can you afford a $200 phone session? You might get relief in one session, depending on which beliefs you eliminate.

[Teknoe]

You can't change what you don't admit.

 

It's a great first step that you've admitted your anger issues, SD. Now, find some potential solutions and different strategies to employ.

 

Now that you've taken the first step to admitting it, what are you going to do next? You have two choices basically:

 

1. Do nothing

2. Try something

 

What are you going to do?

[Els]

Not the Lefkoe method again.... >_>

 

Point blank, FitChick, no student is ever going to pay $200 for one phone session. Especially as most universities offer counselling for free. Which may be a good idea to go to.

[snug.bunny]

I've already seen a few counselors. They haven't really done anything for me. A counselor only treats the symptoms and not the actual problem.

 

That's true. A licensed therapist can't fix you, only you can fix YOU. But, you seem anti-therapy, which means you are not open to it. So, there ya go...

[TheBigQuestion]

Not the Lefkoe method again.... >_>

 

Point blank, FitChick, no student is ever going to pay $200 for one phone session. Especially as most universities offer counselling for free. Which may be a good idea to go to.

 

A substantial portion of FitChick's posts are dedicated to essentially advertising the Lefkoe Method as the solution for whatever ails a poster. At what point is this ban-worthy? Does the Lefkoe Method cure lupus and the common cold too, FitChick? Will a $200 phone session make me run the 40-yard dash faster? Go peddle your snake oil somewhere else.

 

SD: Here is my suggestion: Anger Room Dallas About Us |

 

[Mme. Chaucer]

Actually, the one things that would help you quickly is the Lefkoe Method. Can you afford a $200 phone session? You might get relief in one session, depending on which beliefs you eliminate.

 

Do you get a kickback when somebody goes to that link or signs up for the "session"?