Joaquin Posted May 13, 2012 Posted May 13, 2012 (edited) OP, you are the kinda guy people want to shake and tell to wake the f... up. You are setting yourself up for a world of misery but your too scared to make a move. Even a spell of being single for a period of time is too much for you to deal with. I can see why your girl has little time for you or shows you any respect. Edited May 16, 2012 by a LoveShack.org Moderator civility & respect
phineas Posted May 13, 2012 Posted May 13, 2012 whatever op. You haven't listened to any of the advice from your last threads & aren't going to listen to any of this advice either. Just don't get why someone would want to live like that, walking on egg shells. Good luck with losing half your crap after she divorces you. 1
Professor X Posted May 13, 2012 Posted May 13, 2012 She acts like she likes me some of the time! I don't find it funny considering you plan on marrying her. Kinda sad actually.
dollface07 Posted May 13, 2012 Posted May 13, 2012 Anyway, she never said anything about the flowers and the note. I asked, "Did you see the flowers I got you?" And she said, "Yes." And several hours later I asked, "Did you read the note I left you?" And she said, "Yes." She never said, "Thank you for the flowers," or, "Thank you for pouring your heart out in that note." When I wrote the note I think I actually cried a little, it was so important to me (what I was saying.) Although, it's all stuff we've said before. Thank you so much for your willingness to obtain insight to better understand what's going on with her. You are such a good, considerate and caring man and she is lucky to have you. I can totally appreciate how her actions may have affected you because I believe last week my bf did the same...he had flowers for me in the back of the car and was going to surprise me but we got in a fight and he called me telling me he has something for me that he forgot to give me and I refused to see him nothing has been the same ever since like almost 2 weeks later...he's just distant somehow and trust ME your girlfriend even though this is going against the female sisterhood or something well she NEEDS you to act in a radically different way even if it hurts you to do so in order to get her attention...trust me my guy did this to me and it forced me to reflect upon his feelings even though i was miserable when he changed his doting behavior...i think she'll be much more considerate and wont act in a disrespectful way to you after you change your caring behavior BUT don't change for 2 weeks that's excessive I believe that a week is enough to grab her attention and she will come to her own conclusion without you needing to spell it out for her. Good luck and don't let this incident change your loving, caring actions forever.
dollface07 Posted May 13, 2012 Posted May 13, 2012 sorry i missed that little tidbit of info...yeah that would be disconcerting to a woman but still it does appear that she needs to be dethroned somehow but in a constructive way not b/c you act out and hurt her with a bender...you both have to talk but she really needs to initiate it at this point.
carhill Posted May 13, 2012 Posted May 13, 2012 Here's my response in a previous thread of yours, which I still believe is applicable. Quote: Why would she say she wants to marry me if she doesn't love me? Scary version? She's letting you love her. "She sleeps on the couch most nights when she stays at my place" "When she does sleep with me if she touches me in her sleep she sort of recoils from me." It sounds to me like the posters suggesting purposeful distancing as a passive method to end the relationship are likely correct. Her 'want' to be married is not matching up with her 'attraction' to you. There can be a lot of 'reasons' for this, but the central issue is you're not feeling desired or loved here. My sympathies. Better such issues happen now than after you're married, trust me.
Bridgey Posted May 13, 2012 Posted May 13, 2012 She definitely has problems communicating and it is not likely that is ever going to change. If you marry her this is what you have to look forward to for the rest of the marriage. What you have to ask yourself is this: Are you going to be happy dealing with these mood swings for the rest of your life? If not, don't marry her. I know this is not something you want to sit down and think about, but its what needs to be done. Don't sit around and wait for her to break up with you. Take charge of your life and decide what is best for yourself.
phineas Posted May 13, 2012 Posted May 13, 2012 She definitely has problems communicating and it is not likely that is ever going to change. If you marry her this is what you have to look forward to for the rest of the marriage. What you have to ask yourself is this: Are you going to be happy dealing with these mood swings for the rest of your life? If not, don't marry her. I know this is not something you want to sit down and think about, but its what needs to be done. Don't sit around and wait for her to break up with you. Take charge of your life and decide what is best for yourself. Yep. and what happens AFTER you marry & you meet someone who is genuinely interested in you & attracted to you? Oh, but your married. To a harpy that won't touch you & sleeps in a different bed. But still it's marriage. 1
Recommended Posts