Unsure85 Posted May 11, 2012 Posted May 11, 2012 (edited) So im not going to write a whole thing but me an ex were together for 6 1/2 years. Towards the end of the relationship we were fighting because i would tell her i felt like she didnt care, and all she worried about her self. Sex seemed like it was on a schedule and she was never greatfull for anything. She always had family issues, and money issues and i always stood buy her. The last straw was this past august i took her on a vacation with me and the fam everything paid for an all she did was complain about everything from the food, the events we did anything and everything. She made me look horrible in front of my aunts and uncles and cousins. After that trip i broke it off. We still talked form time to time. Around october i stopped talking to her and tried to move on but my mistake was thinking about the old memories and who she was so i broke the N/C rule and we started talking. Things were good seemed like everything was getting better we said we were exclusive but we werent official. I broke no contact around January we seemed like back to our good old days skyping, naughty stuff too on it, sex up until last month thats when things changed. We arent having sex anymore, barely skype, she calls me everyday after work, and when im not working shes around me . She says she loves me but recently told me shes not attracted to me anymore, shes unsure if its physcially or because of the fighitng. Lately all she does is drink when im not around her, and wants to be friends with guys. Im not controlling whats ever but when all of a sudden its something she needs in her life and im never aloud to be around her friends it causes red flags for me and thats when i have an issue. She flat out told me she wants a live seperate from me. Last night we went out to dinner and got drinks and came back to my place and drank more she flat out got undressed talking about going down on her, 3some, and giving me a Bj. We ended up having sex despite her saying no, then she would act as if she wanted it, then no and then act as if she wanted it. She enjoyed it and seemed everything was fine. Today she came over everthing seemed fine we didnt do it because she didnt want me to . Right before leaving she said she loves me. later told me she feels like i took advantage of her because she was drunk. BTW when it comes to being in a relationship she says she doenst want to be in one, when it comes to discussing feelings she doesnt want to talk about it, she tells me she doesnt care if i talk to other girls but yet if i told her i went out and girls were around she acts jealous. My mind is shot sorry for writting everything like crazy. I dont know how to look at the girl i love and just walk away. I know im stupid for sticking around for so long. Also she never cared for FB before when we were in a relationship and now its like her life. Edited May 11, 2012 by Unsure85
TaraMaiden Posted May 11, 2012 Posted May 11, 2012 Well, you're either broken up or you're not. If you are, you need to go no contact, so read the link in my signature. and stick to it. By the sound of it, you won't though, because you will make all manner of excuses, justifications and reasons as to why or how it's impossible for you to implement. Don't worry - that's fine, it's extremely common. You'll weaken, ask questions, and do all the 'wrong' things everyone does before finally getting the message and cutting off all contact and breaking away to heal. Of course, you could 'cut out the middle man' and just go directly to no contact. but like I said, it's going to take you time to see that's your best - and only - option.
Eddie Edirol Posted May 11, 2012 Posted May 11, 2012 She isnt in love with you anymore, but she doesnt want to see you move on before she does. Thats why she gets jealous when you talk to other women. But it seems like she is emotionally done with you, but cant let go until she finds someone new. Thats why she is telling you to talk to other women. So since its over between you two, dont worry about what she does, and start talking to other women. Let her be jealous. it might make her desire you for a minute, but it wont last, so try to cut her off cold turkey. 1
Author Unsure85 Posted May 11, 2012 Author Posted May 11, 2012 Well, you're either broken up or you're not. If you are, you need to go no contact, so read the link in my signature. and stick to it. By the sound of it, you won't though, because you will make all manner of excuses, justifications and reasons as to why or how it's impossible for you to implement. Don't worry - that's fine, it's extremely common. You'll weaken, ask questions, and do all the 'wrong' things everyone does before finally getting the message and cutting off all contact and breaking away to heal. Of course, you could 'cut out the middle man' and just go directly to no contact. but like I said, it's going to take you time to see that's your best - and only - option. Yea thanks im aware of the no contact rule. Your right i do make excuses its just so hard to let go after being with somebody for over 6 years. I am working and going to gym and school so im busy with that but shes alwasy on my mind no matter what. She isnt in love with you anymore, but she doesnt want to see you move on before she does. Thats why she gets jealous when you talk to other women. But it seems like she is emotionally done with you, but cant let go until she finds someone new. Thats why she is telling you to talk to other women. So since its over between you two, dont worry about what she does, and start talking to other women. Let her be jealous. it might make her desire you for a minute, but it wont last, so try to cut her off cold turkey. Yea i figured that, anytime i dont give her attention or mention that she doenst care or tell her to leave she bust out crying and saying how she loves me. She always wants to be around me when im off. Shes like 2 different peple when shes around me shes caring when shes not here shes grouchy and nasty.
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