Badsingularity Posted May 17, 2012 Posted May 17, 2012 (edited) Yeah it surprises me how many women are too patient. I would have left if a man told me that....wouldn't even last by the 3rd year. Too bad. My wife and I were together for over four years before we got married and our relationship is great. I have to disagree with people saying that four years is too long to wait before getting married. You can't even truly know someone in less than two years and my wife and I were still learning something new about eachother every once in a while all the way up until we got married. Another thing. If you were truly in a good relationship and truly loved the person your were with. Why would you abandon that just because they weren't in any hurry to get the government involved in your relationship? Edited May 17, 2012 by Badsingularity 1
FrustratedStandards Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 He doesn't want to marry you because he doesn't see you as his wife. He doesn't see spending his entire life with you. That's why you bringing it up all the time is annoying and makes him angry. I've been there before. Marriage marriage marriage talk. It gets really annoying to the point where you want to yell "I don't want to marry you now go away!!" He doesn't want to hurt your feelings which is why he is making excuses. I had a man propose to me. He just got laid off, had car problems, and we didn't live together. So trust me. Those aren't excuses. If a man really wanted to, he would. All you have to do is go sign some papers.
samsungxoxo Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 (edited) Too bad. My wife and I were together for over four years before we got married and our relationship is great. I have to disagree with people saying that four years is too long to wait before getting married. You can't even truly know someone in less than two years and my wife and I were still learning something new about eachother every once in a while all the way up until we got married. Another thing. If you were truly in a good relationship and truly loved the person your were with. Why would you abandon that just because they weren't in any hurry to get the government involved in your relationship?Well but everything in life has its limits. I'm sure very few women would be happy being a ''forever gf only''. What if a decade passes by and man refuses to proceed the relationship to the next level. In that instance it's logical for the woman to leave than keep on endlessly waiting for an ''I don't know where is this heading''. If the OP wants marriage, it's not fair for her to keep on waiting years for him to be on that page. Unfortunately she will have to break up with her bf if marriage is her goal. Edited May 18, 2012 by samsungxoxo
Badsingularity Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 [quote=samsungxoxo;4008514 If the OP wants marriage, it's not fair for her to keep on waiting years for him to be on that page. Unfortunately she will have to break up with her bf if marriage is her goal. It seems some women think that being married is more important than the man they are marrying or the relationship they have with that man. Ironically this kind of thinking usaully ends in divorce or an unhappy marriage. Something to think about. 1
samsungxoxo Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 It seems some women think that being married is more important than the man they are marrying or the relationship they have with that man.No both are important, not only marriage itself but the man considers me as wife material, it would mean that I mean a lot to him than just a gf he likes to hang out with. That's basically his way of saying ''I want to spend the rest of my life with you and willing to face all the goods and bads within this union''.
smith9800 Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 I think his reasoning that he wants to live with you first is valid enough. I wouldn't consider marrying someone I hadn't lived with. Having said that, marriage just doesn't sound as important to him as it is to you.
6ft180natl Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 It seems some women think that being married is more important than the man they are marrying or the relationship they have with that man. Ironically this kind of thinking usaully ends in divorce or an unhappy marriage. Something to think about. Exactly, to me someone who is willing to break up because they can't get married is a sign that they probably are not be the one to marry since I wouldn't want a wife who considers me so easily replaceable anyway.
Oxy Moronovich Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 It seems some women think that being married is more important than the man they are marrying or the relationship they have with that man. Ironically this kind of thinking usaully ends in divorce or an unhappy marriage. Something to think about. Exactly, to me someone who is willing to break up because they can't get married is a sign that they probably are not be the one to marry since I wouldn't want a wife who considers me so easily replaceable anyway. Both these quotes are top notch and insightful. I never thought of it before but it's true.
Phennyphen Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 I think the question you have to ask yourself at this point is not "why wont he marry me?" but "why do i even want to marry him?"
pink_sugar Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 Being together period for that amount of time and not living together yet is quite some time. I wouldn't give him any ultimatums at this point, but ask yourself this, what is preventing you two from living together now? You've been together for some time to make this move. Next question is, what steps is he taking to become more financially stable? Is he going to school, going through training, is he looking for one stable, better paying, long term position?
pink_sugar Posted May 18, 2012 Posted May 18, 2012 To me it isn't a piece of paper, its a legal document that says we are binded together. Its jot about the dress, the cake, the ceremony or anything. I was planning on going up yo Maine getting a small ceremony done at the light house and then going home to have a party in the yard with friends and family. The ceremony cost 3,500.00 together we could save that much in a year. I was also going to rent a dress and then just biy a cheap white one for the reception at home. So its really not about all the typical stuff I'd also recommend checking out places like houseofbrides.com or ebay. They have dresses for the fraction of the price versus buying one in a store. You'll have to do a price comparison to renting when and if it comes to that point.
Rahstyles Posted May 19, 2012 Posted May 19, 2012 He wont marry you because his a punk.. also his looking to see if theres other options besides you.. Dont stay with that guy your waisting time.
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