NeoGen85 Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 I have been taking the advice of others on here while dating. To be honest, it's help a lot. My biggest problem was feeling out of my league when in fact I learned now matter what person you are sometimes you'll get a "chance" anyway. I've been exploring the dating life in a city that I've lived around for awhile. I had so many encounters but I haven't really found the one. That's okay, because I'm a single working class man enjoying life. A beautiful city, good looking women, family, and the beach 15 minutes away. Although Charleston, SC is hot as balls(humid). It's been a year and half since my ex-girlfriend and I split. At the time that we were dating I wasn't in the position I am now. I didn't have much self confidence. It actually affected my dating life before I got back on my feet. Then I started making things happen and the blessings started to roll in. My name is Joshua. I felt it was a powerful name, and I should live up too it. Now I can say that I am. In all the enjoyment of my life I forgot about my ex-girlfriend. Then a best friend of mine started dating one of her old good friends. The two of us get closer and she's becomes a great friend as well. Yesterday, we meet up for a beer after work and she brings up the old girlfriend. She asked how I felt about the lady in my past relationship and I told her that the feeling was mutual. That night when I fell asleep, I started dreaming about the ex. Bad timing for bringing old feelings back, right? It was strange because we both went our separate ways and never talked again. We were in a interracial relationship. There were people on both sides of the party that vocally did not want to see us together. They thought that she was too good for me or that I was too good for her. It was today that I learned that she caved in on the pressure. With the lack of communication things fell apart. She rebounded with a man immediately and has been with him ever since we broke up. So now it's possibly more than just a "rebound". I want to get in touch with her again but it might be too late. I've heard some negative things about him from her close friends..but it still might be too late. It's not about rescuing her; but finding out why and how she feels now? Should I leave her alone or just keep moving on like I have before?
Author NeoGen85 Posted May 10, 2012 Author Posted May 10, 2012 You're right. To get involve with her would bring up dead history and a man I don't want to deal with. I need to stop wondering, "what if".
InJest Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 Can't hurt to test the waters, just don't set high expectations.
TaraMaiden Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 Can't hurt to test the waters, Actually, there's no guarantee of that..... just don't set high expectations. Don't set any at all..... Let sleeping dogs lie (no disrespect intended) but really, to start wondering, is just going to mess your head up, and possibly screw with hers as well. Try to just put it aside and know that life moves on. It does that for a reason. Goes forward, not backwards.... That would just be nuts.......... right?
stillafool Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 I think it's sad that the only reason you and your ex girlfriend broke up was because it was an interracial relationship. I bet she still thinks about you too and wonders the "what ifs". I guess you should move on as others have said. Maybe someday you will meet again face to face.
joystickd Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 Move on because you don't want someone that can't make their own decisions and let other people influence their life.
RiverRunning Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 You're right. To get involve with her would bring up dead history and a man I don't want to deal with. I need to stop wondering, "what if". This is the best thing you can do. She's with someone else. You haven't spoken to her since, and whether or not her friends hate him, it's none of your business. She gets to decide whether or not she's happy. I can imagine how furious I would be if I had been dating a guy for nearly two years and his ex came along and tried to rip us apart by injecting herself back into our lives. To do it to someone else is just the same. You're romanticizing this past relationship - likely because you haven't had anything serious on the horizon since her, so when you think of love, your mind goes to the latest experience you've had.
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