Author DuchessKaye Posted May 10, 2012 Author Posted May 10, 2012 Say what........... Yeah... While we were hangin out at his place with his sibs and friends. I cooked, cleaned the whole kitchen, prepared and made the bed. And that's when he told these people that yeah, I can make a good housewife. You didn't take this compliment quite seriously, did you?
joystickd Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 MOVE ON? Should I? I know I want to go away... but I'm planning to come back when I am already confident about myself... that's if... if and only if... he'd still be single by then... You shouldn't have to come back. He should realize what he had and want to be with you.
FitChick Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 DuchessKaye is obviously from a culture where this ("housewife") is important in a woman so I wouldn't criticize her for it. That's why I think her job is not important to her boyfriend.
joystickd Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 Yeah... While we were hangin out at his place with his sibs and friends. I cooked, cleaned the whole kitchen, prepared and made the bed. And that's when he told these people that yeah, I can make a good housewife. You didn't take this compliment quite seriously, did you? I have a rule if we ain't married there is no need to cook and clean and make my bed. That also includes living together. There is no need to marry you if you are already doing the duties of a wife
Author DuchessKaye Posted May 10, 2012 Author Posted May 10, 2012 Nah, don't be changing yourself and doing sh't you don't want too in order to impress him or whatever. If he is into you, he'll take you for who you are now no matter if you are below his $$$$ level or not. BTW screw surgery to be like his model exes....Are you kidding? You're freakin hot! I saw the pics! No human is worth going to this length for. Thanks! But if I am freakin hot... What about this exes? Goddesses???
threebyfate Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 He's starting to commit... everything is going exactly the way I want it... He actually just introduced me as his girlfriend to all his sibs and some friends. He even told them that I will make a good housewife. But... now that I'm getting to know more and more about him, and now that I'm meeting all these people that surround him... I feel insecure... like, I don't fit into his world... And that's why I would want to upgrade myself, and change not just a little bit, but A LOT!Based on the list of improvements expressed within this thread, does everyone that he's introduced you to, meet the same standards?
FitChick Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 But if I am freakin hot... What about this exes? Goddesses??? Obviously being a good housewife is more important to him or he'd still be with those women, right?
Author DuchessKaye Posted May 10, 2012 Author Posted May 10, 2012 I have a rule if we ain't married there is no need to cook and clean and make my bed. That also includes living together. There is no need to marry you if you are already doing the duties of a wife I don't know but if I really don't want a messy place. So, I always make sure that his place is clean all around when I am there. But, that's just me. And also, I don't want him to cook for us, he knows no sh't about cooking, so I am in charge...
Heart Of A Lion Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 I kind of feel the need/urge to also reach the achievements that he has... so that he can proudly introduce me to his family and colleagues... I want to be as successful as him, I want to be as sociable as him, I want to be as gorgeous as his exes, I want to have this and that of being one of the upper classes, I want to overflow with benjamins. All along I've been happy with what I have, I've been contented with what I can make. But now, NO! I want more... I'm wanting more because I want to be the best and be the perfect match for him. And I was thinking if I should let him go now while I am pursuing all these things that I am wanting or should I let him stay while I am upgrading myself... Men generally don't care about what a woman makes or how successful she is. The other way around isn't necessarily true. A study has shown that women rate the same man as 500% more attractive if he owns his own house. Personally I don't give a f*ck if a woman owns her own house or if she lives in a slum. It's probably also why Russian bride websites are so popular among Western men, they don't care that the woman makes $250 per month. That's often not the case the other way around though. I've heard a lot of women say that they don't care what a man makes, but when you then look at what types of men those same women go for, then their behavior shows that they do heavily focus on the man's income/wealth. That's why I just don't believe that when that comes out of a woman's mouth. The studies doesn't lie, women do care about the wealth and income of a man. A woman that says that she doesn't care about that sort of thing then actually claims to be the exception to the rule. I'll believe it when I see it. I've heard women say that they don't care about the wealth and income of a man, but end up talking about their exes as losers with dead end jobs. Which has me thinking: "Hey but I thought you said you didn't care about that sort of thing." 1
Author DuchessKaye Posted May 10, 2012 Author Posted May 10, 2012 Based on the list of improvements expressed within this thread, does everyone that he's introduced you to, meet the same standards? His Mom and Dad are professionals... Business Runners... Siblings are multi-degree holders like him... Friends are all in nice suit... I couldn't help myself but feel intimidated... My Mom and My Dad are successful people, I know, but my sibs, ugh, Dance Instructor, Photographer and the youngest is just helping my Dad in his plantation... Me? I just took Education in college... I'm supposed to teach little kids on nursery...
threebyfate Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 His Mom and Dad are professionals... Business Runners... Siblings are multi-degree holders like him... Friends are all in nice suit... I couldn't help myself but feel intimidated... My Mom and My Dad are successful people, I know, but my sibs, ugh, Dance Instructor, Photographer and the youngest is just helping my Dad in his plantation... Me? I just took Education in college... I'm supposed to teach little kids on nursery...So you've collected all the traits you perceive as positive, from a number of individuals and have created a consolidated standard for yourself? Do you realize how irrational that is?
matte123 Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 If you don't feel like he's the one for you, then it's better to leave than waste your time and his time on the relationship. I don't think this is what your issue is based on your other questions. It's normal to feel like you're not good enough since we all feel this way at some point or another. You should stay true to yourself and improve yourself for YOU only. This includes undergoing plastic surgery although I think you do not need it since you're beautiful already Do not change yourself for another person in order to fit into their world and match their lifestyle. That being said, I think you should work on accepting and loving yourself.
Author DuchessKaye Posted May 10, 2012 Author Posted May 10, 2012 Duchesskaye-take it from me-youre hot...i'm a bloke,i know these kind of things. His exes are exactly that exes....you have nothing to compete with as they are exe's .Gottit? Most men (whisper this) like to feel strong/powerful/intelligent/wise/cultured and a little bit moreso than their significant others.Maybe your man likes you EXACTLY the way you are.Stop looking for problems,enjoy what you have. If you don't feel like he's the one for you, then it's better to leave than waste your time and his time on the relationship. I don't think this is what your issue is based on your other questions. It's normal to feel like you're not good enough since we all feel this way at some point or another. You should stay true to yourself and improve yourself for YOU only. This includes undergoing plastic surgery although I think you do not need it since you're beautiful already Do not change yourself for another person in order to fit into their world and match their lifestyle. That being said, I think you should work on accepting and loving yourself. Got it! Got it! Thanks...
persevere Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 What to do when you 'feel' like you aren't good enough?? Put that crazy thought totally out of your mind. Have confidence in yourself. NO ONE is better than you are. If you have that, but not an arrogant tone to it, it's contagious. Women (and men) like someone who is true to themselves. People are essentially the same, with similar hopes and fears. Meet them and know yourself.
Disillusioned Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 It's a catch-22. If you're awesome, those kinds of worries are so small they're not even an issue for you. And if you're a bum or a sad sack, you shouldn't worry, because you're not impressing anybody anyways. :-p
Recommended Posts