Anyone disagree no contact is not always the right thing? Can we be friends?

[woodstok]

Just wondering if anyone out there thinks the no contact rule is not always the best thing to do? My ex and I have been broken up for about 3 weeks now and yes i suffered and hurt because even though it was only 8 mothns and 5 of those we lived together it hurts to lose her. She has lied to me about many things and i know she is already seeing someon new who she more than likely met while still with me and that is not cool. The thing is i know i could not take her back because i would never be able to truly trust her again, but at the same time i know she is going through a tough time at home and she really has no one to talk to so i would like to be a friend. I did not contact her for the 1st week and even after that she called me 3 times but i refused to answer the phone until she left me a message saying to please answer my phone. I did eventually talk to her and we talked about us and even though i know what she has been up to and she has been untruthful with me, she thinks i am a dumbass and have no clue what she is up to. anyways i dont actively try to call her, i text her in the mornings and this just started yesterday after we started talking finally and i wish her a good day and leave it at that, she usually responds but unless its important i dont respons and she calls me later in the day just to see what is up, our conversations are nice and friendly, even though at times i would love to say look i know your lieing to me about this but i figure why make it easy for her to move on by me getting mad at her seeing somone else and us fighting. I want to just be there for her even though i am and know i have to move on i cant wait for her and i wont, is anyone here agree somtimes contact is ok? Is anyone here friends with an ex and remains good friends? How is the relationship and how did things evolve? We talk about hanging out maybe getting together to watch a movie, dinner, even talked about going out this saturday to a club to dance. I wont lie i love her and would like to have her back but i know i deserve better and what she is doing is wrong and for me to take her back i would lose respect for myself, anyways anyone got some advice? Is it cool to talk from time to time and hang out and is it possibel to be friends?

[honey2005]

When my boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me and he said he wanted to be friends, I tried it. I mean, how can you just stop talking to the one person that has meant everything to you for the past 3 years of your life? I stayed online waiting for him to write me, I would lay in bed and wait for him to call, and on the nights he did get online to write me, he would stay for a few minutes, then say he had to go to call his girlfriend. Everytime I talked to him it would hurt so much, and the night would always end with me crying. I thought that being friends would work, but I see now that it won't. Maybe after I've had time to move on, I can be friends with him, and maybe it's the same for you. I used to be sooo close to my ex, but now thinking about him makes me cry. You can try being friends, but I'm not sure it will work out. Good luck though:)

[beautiful]

She has lied to you? Why would you want to hang on to someone like that? Take care of yourself, find out why you want tobe with someone who treated you so poorly...............it takes 2 for everything and not knowing her side of this story I don't want to judge her. I am sure you had some doings in this situation.

 

 

Move on! Staying friend with ex's is a lost cause. EX'S are EX'S for a reason!