Aikon Posted May 9, 2012 Posted May 9, 2012 I broke up with my Ex about 2 months ago, but realized how much of a mistake I've made. During our break up I told her that I had no feelings for her even though that was not true I was emotionally stressed from all the negative feedback from the people around us. We were a interracial couple and it felt really uncomfortable, with people giving us dirty stares. I was also afraid to visit her place because of fear of rejection from her parents as well as mines. Now I realized how much I really loved her and it did not matter what people thought, I just want to be with her. She started to date again one week after the break up and had feelings for my friend(he was the one who was comforting her and keeping her up when we broke up, he's from another state and flew over here to see her). I felt like I will lose her forever if I didn't say anything and told her how I felt, she said that she had no more feelings for me and said that she sees me as a good friend. I kept in contact for a month because before we dated we were very good friends, but now it's killing me to see her with someone else and I told her that I didn't want to be her friend that I needed to go no contact if she decides to date my friend. I did what most guys would do and poured out my heart on how I felt about her, I begged and pleaded for a second chance and she said no. I really want her back but I'm losing hope and crushed, is it time to move on?
january2011 Posted May 10, 2012 Posted May 10, 2012 Yes, it's time to move on. You broke up with her and told her that you had no feelings for her. Not exactly actions and words that you can take back. And now that she's dating someone else, your friend no less, you want her back. You can probably see how it looks to her. Besides, there are the issues regarding being part of an interracial couple and her parents' disapproval - beyond a change of heart, what evidence is there that you can now cope with these circumstances that won't ever change? I think some of the important lessons to learn here are to be honest with your feelings (with yourself and your partner) and not to let other people make your decisions for you.
Phanpooh Posted May 11, 2012 Posted May 11, 2012 Let me see, face with it, you just worried that someone treat her better than you did. Some emotions just like jealous, guilty,... Turn your selfish on and kill yourself. Face it, let it go, if she love you, she will do everything to take you back! And if you love her, u know she deserve more. If there isnt love, so turn your evil down, believe me, just be single for awhile and then you will see what happen
Author Aikon Posted May 13, 2012 Author Posted May 13, 2012 (edited) I know for a fact that If she gave me another chance, I would make her happy. I had a constant fear of the relationship not working with all these barriers before and with that mentality it eventually did. My parents did not learn of the relationship until recently, and to my surprise when I sat down and seriously talked to them about this relationship they did not disapprove of it. This is my first serious adult relationship, and I believe it was hers as well. We were intimate fairly quickly(3 months) and she even said that she regret nothing during our relationship, we both lost our V cards to each other. She is young (18) and sometimes I do wonder if it was love or if she was infatuated with me. I felt really emotional when I found out that she wanted to go after my friend 2 weeks later, despite the fact that he knew I still had feelings for her. Not only did he not ask me, but said that he would come over to hang out as friends, on the second day they tried to hide holding hands, I saw the really bad attempt to hide it and I felt so crushed during his entire visit. I had a uneasy feeling and I was a fool to meet up with him, for the weekend because they started getting close right away. I felt betrayed by my now ex friend, he flew all the way here just to see her. I kept thinking to myself out of all girls he had to go after my ex, it showed how much he really thought of our friendship. I am jealous at the fact that she flirted with him as well, she has a amazing personality and is easily likeable. My friend actually had the nerves to say that "feelings are feelings" and he had no control over it. I was so angry that I wanted to punch him right then and there, but I knew it would not improve the situation. He's been a friend for 9 years and had a similar situation happen to him and he was on the receiving end, I treated him like a good friend. I know it is love with her because I don't even mind if they got together, yes the thought of it kills me inside but as long as she's in my arms again that's all that matters, But it seems that she really no longer feels that way about me and it's so painful because she was right in front of me loving me with her full heart and I made the mistake of dumping her. Edited May 13, 2012 by Aikon
favoritepills Posted May 13, 2012 Posted May 13, 2012 Sorry to say this, but you made a mistake and she's realized she can find someone who will treat her better than you did. Just accept this as a lesson learned and do better with the next girl that comes along.
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