cocorico Posted May 14, 2012 Posted May 14, 2012 Also, if your friends see you hanging around bars a lot they're likely to think poor guy is unhappy let's buy him a drink, while if they see you in classy restaurants, at movies and at gigs always with the same woman they will think whoa! That's serious! Maybe we should warn his wife. So a LTA would be more risky.
cocorico Posted May 14, 2012 Posted May 14, 2012 Another risk with a LTA is what happens if the A is discovered. With a string of ONS the BS is unlikely to go and hunt them all down but with a LTA especially if the BS finds love texts there is a greater risk of bi g hunted down by the BS.
Gfkr2 Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 Also, if your friends see you hanging around bars a lot they're likely to think poor guy is unhappy let's buy him a drink, while if they see you in classy restaurants, at movies and at gigs always with the same woman they will think whoa! That's serious! Maybe we should warn his wife. So a LTA would be more risky. Bingo. That is exactly how it happens. In many instances the LTA continues through, going underground until the BS falls back into his or her comatose ways. The LTA definately has more risks, but the reward is a deep and personal relationship that has often been missing in the M. It is very addicting, trust me. 1
Gfkr2 Posted May 20, 2012 Posted May 20, 2012 It's interesting that you should post this because the MW I'm seeing is a complete paradox. She is leading a double life, since I've been with her for many years; however, she is also a terrible liar at the same. When her H asks her where she's been or what she had for dinner, she'll come up with an answer but it's obvious that he's not buying it. She'll break out in a laughing fit, or will exhibit some type of behavior that makes the H roll his eyes. She isn't a good liar at all. The main thing that she has going for her is her flexible schedule / career which makes it hard for the H to establish a routine or pattern indicative of red flags, since it involves quite a bit of travel. The main thing she really has going is the husband is likely a cuckold. You might be surprised to know that he has a very good idea of what is going on, but is to chicken or complacent to stop it. This happens more often than people know where the woman is of higher status, more beautiful, makes more money, whatever than the "lucky" husband. The cockold ignores what is going on because he lacks the confidence to leave the M, or at least demand an end to the affair. Cuckollded husbands are afraid to confront the WS wondering what if she says "no" to ending the affair, or worse yet seeks to end the M.
Radagast Posted May 21, 2012 Posted May 21, 2012 The main thing she really has going is the husband is likely a cuckold. You might be surprised to know that he has a very good idea of what is going on, but is to chicken or complacent to stop it. This happens more often than people know where the woman is of higher status, more beautiful, makes more money, whatever than the "lucky" husband. The cockold ignores what is going on because he lacks the confidence to leave the M, or at least demand an end to the affair. Cuckollded husbands are afraid to confront the WS wondering what if she says "no" to ending the affair, or worse yet seeks to end the M. I don't think this dynamic is exclusive to married women / other men scenarios. I have seen similar situations where women have aged badly or let themselves go and are no longer in the same league as their husband and so are willing to tolerate his dalliances because they know that if they insisted on a choice he would be unlikely to choose in their favour and they would stand to lose considerably. In situations like those the Long Term Affair is definitely the greater threat as the unfaithful spouse may continue to invest heavily in the affair in a way they would not in a series of one night stands and may well find themselves asking why they're staying in a marriage that's not "up to spec".
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