momto3boys Posted May 7, 2012 Posted May 7, 2012 My ex-husband is always telling me i need to change this or that. I change it, then there seems to be something else wrong that i need to change. I have finally came to the conclusion that i will never be who he wants me to be. I will never make him happy. I am also sick of being the blame for everything. I always admit my faults and i also apologize for everything. He never takes blame. I had been moping around feeling like i was the worst person in the world and all of my relationships were doomed because i had so many flaws that my ex pointed out. My ex makes me feel like im such a mess up. But i have really realized a lot of the marriage issues is because of his selfishness. I am also just sick of him not doing anything for our kids. Barely calls to check on them, doesnt always pay child support (i filed, it hasnt gone through court. We have 2 kids together and he only wants to pay 200 a month. Suppose to pay 800 a month. My oldest sons father pays 365 just for one child!) He goes out to eat, goes on fishing trips, gets new clothes and we are struggling and he says he cant afford to give me any more than 200. I am starting to get annoyed by this. I use to walk on egg shells because i didnt wanna push too much child support and him not want to work things out, but now i am starting to get the bigger picture and realize it doesnt matter if he gets mad, i need the help for my kids. I think im really starting to get over everything now. It feels good. Just had to share 1
Green Light Posted May 7, 2012 Posted May 7, 2012 My ex-husband is always telling me i need to change this or that. I change it, then there seems to be something else wrong that i need to change. I have finally came to the conclusion that i will never be who he wants me to be. I will never make him happy. I am also sick of being the blame for everything. I always admit my faults and i also apologize for everything. He never takes blame. I had been moping around feeling like i was the worst person in the world and all of my relationships were doomed because i had so many flaws that my ex pointed out. My ex makes me feel like im such a mess up. But i have really realized a lot of the marriage issues is because of his selfishness. ^^^THIS is exactly the reason that my wife and I have been separated for the past two months. I was constantly under her microscope and being told that I need to change while in her mind she was 100 percent perfect. Believe me, she wasn't! After a while a person just can't take it any more. Congrats on moving on! I'm doing the same myself.
Author momto3boys Posted May 7, 2012 Author Posted May 7, 2012 ^^^THIS is exactly the reason that my wife and I have been separated for the past two months. I was constantly under her microscope and being told that I need to change while in her mind she was 100 percent perfect. Believe me, she wasn't! After a while a person just can't take it any more. Congrats on moving on! I'm doing the same myself. glad you are doing the same!!
jaymz Posted May 7, 2012 Posted May 7, 2012 I understand too! Glad I am out of it now, I am much happier and my personality has come back. He has a responsibility to those kids and should pay. In the UK its against the law and there are powers to take the money direct from salary rather than rely on him paying you directly. May be worth a look into or speak to a lawyer. It does take time for things to settle down and you seem to be moving in the right direction, keep it up.
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