Grizzkid Posted May 6, 2012 Posted May 6, 2012 I need a little help explaining this text. Really randomly tonight she messaged me saying "But you didn't have to cut me off! Now your just somebody that I used to know!.. Totally just came on the radio and I thought of you haha" I made her listen to this song once and she couldn't believe that I'd listen to music like that. Other than that there's no reason to text me something like that. Is she just bringing back that memory or saying this because those lyrics pretty much sum up what happened between us?
SilverLining Posted May 6, 2012 Posted May 6, 2012 It's a pretty pathetic bid for attention. Depending on what's going on (are you NC? Did she screw you over? Did you screw her over?) don't respond to it. If you are going NC then she's trying to break the wall to get you to talk to her. If she screwed you over, she's trying to talk to you again, but it's probably not because she changed her mind...probably she wants to get back a little of the power she once had with you. She's not messaging she wants you back, she's messaging you the line from a song. Finally, if you screwed her over, then it's kinder to just ignore her so that she can move on. 1
jennisfora Posted May 6, 2012 Posted May 6, 2012 he dumped her to pursue something...a marine corps officer training. my ex posted that song on fb after dumping me, i hate that song because of it. it is about a dumper being mad because the dumpee wont be friends with him, and did NC...i just have no sympathy for the singer, who is in the position of the dumper, you dont have to be friends with someone you dumped, and you can be shut out, it is perfectly fine. being dumped hurts, the person needs to think of themselves, because the dumper is not thinking of them or their feelings, if they dont think of their own, then no one is...anyway, i hate that song. im just someone he used to know, but you know what, it was his doing, as it is yours. have you told her you regret breaking up with her? have you told her you felt it was a mistake? 1
Author Grizzkid Posted May 6, 2012 Author Posted May 6, 2012 I screwed her over but it was under weird circumstances. I didn't cheat or anything. I just cut her off to focus on the Marines and College. But now I realized I f'd up and I really wish I had her back. I already texted her back saying "That's kind of funny you mention that considering our situation" and a few hours later I got a text saying "You just ruined that song for me haha" Maybe she's is just being friendly? idk. Cause I really doubt she wants me back because she already has a new bf and seems really happy with him.
SilverLining Posted May 6, 2012 Posted May 6, 2012 I just really can't stand the whole - I have something to say to someone and instead of just telling that person, I'll send a song lyric. Ugh. Regardless of why he dumped her then, he dumped her. And so he should just go NC on her because then she has the best opportunity to move on. Speaking as someone who did the breakup/get back together thing for years, when my ex refused to talk to me, didn't answer my texts, and didn't return my calls it pissed me off in the moment but looking back it prevented me from acting sillier and it helped me get my head straight faster. When he was in contact with me, he just ended up using me and making things so much worse. 1
jennisfora Posted May 6, 2012 Posted May 6, 2012 she isnt 100 percent happy, or she wouldnt be texting you. im pretty sure her current bf would probably have mixed feelings if he knew she was texting her ex, unless he is abnormally secure. i would tread carefully. if she continues texting, i think you should ask her if she would be willing to get back together down the road, and see what she says. just to see if that is her motivation, she may want you back, but be afraid of rejection, plus she is still with someone. but she definitely still has feelings, i thnk she is testing the water to see if you are still interested in her. you are the dumper, so it is kinda up to you. typically dumpees have been burned all ready, and are reluctant to get burned again, plus there is the complication of her being with someone, so just see if she sees a possible future, and go from there, if she does, she may break up with this guy who was a rebound, pretty quick. she may be waiting for the okay that you are interested in her.
Author Grizzkid Posted May 6, 2012 Author Posted May 6, 2012 I really feel like she's 100% happy with him and maybe just trying to take the friend route with me. I would love to know how she truly felt without trying to decipher through all of these subliminal messages. And I don't want to just come out and ask because of the whole bf thing. I've never even told her how I felt because I believe if its meant to be than its meant to be. I don't want to spill all of my feelings out on the table just to try and get her back. Especially when she has a bf right now. I think it'll just make matters worse because then she'll be split between me and him. And even if she did come back to me she might still have unresolved feelings for him and cause us trouble. So, I think it'd be best if I just let things with them take its course and then take it from there.
jennisfora Posted May 6, 2012 Posted May 6, 2012 that is probably wise. if you are going to do that, try not to read too much into it. i would not initiate too much, if any contact while she has a bf. be polite to her, of course, but, probably best to do your own thing, and try not to focus on her. i still think this guy is a rebound, and still find it hard to believe she is as happy as you think. i didnt text recent exes while with someone...not unless i wanted drama. i have never been a drama addict, but some women are. she started dating him right after being dumped pretty much didn't she? you don't get over people that fast unless you have all ready checked out, and it doesn't sound like she had, so she started dating this guy before she was over you, so in the end, this current guy will probably be hurt, which is why you never date someone who has just left a relationship...you can't turn feelings off like a faucet.
favoritepills Posted May 6, 2012 Posted May 6, 2012 I admire that you can stay level-headed about this situation even though you still have feelings for her. Go with your instinct; if she truly wants to come back to you, she will eventually. In the meantime, take the high road, either don't reply or just say something short and polite.
Author Grizzkid Posted May 6, 2012 Author Posted May 6, 2012 I gotta say talking all this out on this forum really makes me feel so much better. Today is the first day in a long while that I feel like I can think clearly. I feel as though everything will work out in time. I mean there's only 2 choices; either we'll get back together or I'll have to move on. I just gotta quit worrying about it and enjoy life. Nothing positive is going to come from this senseless depressed feeling. Summer break is right around the corner and i'll have plenty of opportunities to meet new girls. Feel so happy and almost relieved right now. Thanks everyone for your input
EgoJoe Posted May 6, 2012 Posted May 6, 2012 That song is about a two time dumpee and a rebound girl who wised up. Not a dumper.
Warrior Posted May 6, 2012 Posted May 6, 2012 It means: hey I will try to provoke him, by bringing up the past memories and hurting him. Thats what it means
Author Grizzkid Posted May 7, 2012 Author Posted May 7, 2012 Idk man. I know her pretty well and she's a little to innocent and nice to send a text aimed at hurting me. This is going to sound weird but I think it had no meaning it all. I'm thinking the song just came on in her car and she was reminded of me and than decided to text that... Tbh I really don't care anymore haha
Zabs Posted May 8, 2012 Posted May 8, 2012 Sometimes, all a person can do is express themselves through music..but is what they are trying to say worth listening to? There's a lot to be said for straight talk..because subliminals are real hard work and require a great depth of knowledge about the other person..and indeed yourself!!! Much love, Zabs xx
MissBrunette84 Posted May 8, 2012 Posted May 8, 2012 She wouldnt have said it if she didn't expect a reply. Just depends if you want to play that game.
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